2876: Life Without the Constraints of Time and Money by Craig Stephens of RetireBeforeDad on Financial Independence

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: This is Optimal Finance Daily.

[00:00:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Life Without the Constraints of Time and Money by Craig Stephens of RetireBeforeDad.com.

[00:00:10] [SPEAKER_00]: And I'm your host and personal finance enthusiast, Diana Merriam.

[00:00:14] [SPEAKER_00]: We're going to get right to it and continue optimizing your life.

[00:00:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Life Without the Constraints of Time and Money by Craig Stephens of RetireBeforeDad.com.

[00:00:30] [SPEAKER_00]: It's summer break for our kids.

[00:00:33] [SPEAKER_00]: They don't have much to compare this summer to, but life is good.

[00:00:37] [SPEAKER_00]: No school, no homework, no job, no workday calendar, no bills to pay.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_00]: They had Lucky Charm cereal for dinner Saturday night.

[00:00:46] [SPEAKER_00]: Parenting fail.

[00:00:48] [SPEAKER_00]: The marshmallows are way bigger today than when we were young.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Man, kids have it good these days.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Last week they had swim lessons and zoology camp.

[00:01:00] [SPEAKER_00]: The rest of their time was spent at the pool, playing around the house, in front of the

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_00]: TV or eating snacks.

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm envious.

[00:01:08] [SPEAKER_00]: Mom manages their days like an office administrator.

[00:01:11] [SPEAKER_00]: The kids just have to put on their shoes and stand still for some block.

[00:01:16] [SPEAKER_00]: They don't even fight some block anymore because leaving the house usually means they're going

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_00]: somewhere awesome.

[00:01:21] [SPEAKER_00]: The only real constraints on their lives are bedtime and the amount of sugar they're allowed

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_00]: to ingest.

[00:01:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Walking far from home.

[00:01:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Quitting my job to go backpacking the world for 14 months in my 20s was one of the best

[00:01:37] [SPEAKER_00]: decisions I've ever made.

[00:01:38] [SPEAKER_00]: I saw a lot of cool stuff and met interesting people every day.

[00:01:43] [SPEAKER_00]: But one of the greatest benefits was the freedom from responsibility.

[00:01:48] [SPEAKER_00]: I left the US without anything tying me down.

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_00]: The few material possessions I owned stayed at my parents' house.

[00:01:56] [SPEAKER_00]: There was no rental property yet, no girlfriend, no kids, no debts, no life complications.

[00:02:03] [SPEAKER_00]: My expenses rarely exceeded $20 per day.

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_00]: With a few thousand dollars in the bank, I was free to travel without the constraints

[00:02:12] [SPEAKER_00]: of time and money.

[00:02:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Early in our trip, my travel partner and I rented motorbikes and explored the city and

[00:02:20] [SPEAKER_00]: outskirts of a town called Hue in Vietnam.

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_00]: We rode helmetless, as was the norm, cruising the beautiful landscape, stopping at the occasional

[00:02:31] [SPEAKER_00]: historic tomb or palace.

[00:02:33] [SPEAKER_00]: At one such palace pit stop, we returned to our motorbikes and found them adorned with

[00:02:39] [SPEAKER_00]: lotus flowers.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Two giggling little girls hid behind some bushes and ran off when we tried to thank

[00:02:46] [SPEAKER_00]: them.

[00:02:47] [SPEAKER_00]: We rented motorbikes in other cities in Vietnam, Cambodia, and Thailand.

[00:02:53] [SPEAKER_00]: It was so much fun to explore that way.

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_00]: I was in good company.

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_00]: We had no destination and nowhere to be.

[00:03:00] [SPEAKER_00]: We just drove wherever the road took us, wind in our hair, oblivious to how dumb it was

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_00]: to ride without a helmet.

[00:03:08] [SPEAKER_00]: I had all the time and money I needed to do exactly what I wanted to do every single day.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I never felt so free in my life.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_00]: That's the feeling I want to recreate in retirement, not just while traveling, but every day.

[00:03:25] [SPEAKER_00]: Sunset soon forgotten

[00:03:28] [SPEAKER_00]: After the final leg of my trip was over towards the end of 2002, I was broke and living with

[00:03:35] [SPEAKER_00]: my parents for about seven months.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_00]: When I finally landed a job, I started taking on grown-up responsibilities.

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_00]: I moved to a different city, bought a car with debt, and signed a lease to rent a room

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_00]: for $750 a month.

[00:03:50] [SPEAKER_00]: A few years later, I bought a condo and s*** got real.

[00:03:54] [SPEAKER_00]: My monthly housing payment jumped to more than $2,300.

[00:03:59] [SPEAKER_00]: I made enough money to cover the payment, but very little, if anything, was left over

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_00]: to invest.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I started to feel the weight of my decision just a few nights after closing.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_00]: The payment was too big.

[00:04:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I was lonely and unhappy living by myself.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_00]: It was the fall of 2006.

[00:04:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Alone each night, I listened to an album called The Creek Drank the Cradle by Iron & Wine

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_00]: in the darkness of my dwelling over and over again.

[00:04:30] [SPEAKER_00]: I didn't own any lamps yet.

[00:04:32] [SPEAKER_00]: The album is quiet and melancholy, but it's beautiful and uplifting at times, too.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't stop listening.

[00:04:40] [SPEAKER_00]: Traveling long-term again was out of the question now that I was a homeowner.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Work was no longer optional, a factor I didn't consider before buying.

[00:04:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Soon came the real estate crisis, then the banking crisis, and suddenly I was underwater

[00:04:55] [SPEAKER_00]: and the value of my home was down $50,000.

[00:04:59] [SPEAKER_00]: In just four years, I went from being completely careless and free to being trapped by the

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_00]: weight of what was supposed to be part of the American dream.

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_00]: I've never felt more constricted.

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Promising Light

[00:05:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Buying a condo felt like the right move at the time.

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_00]: I missed the previous 15 years of steep real estate appreciation, and I didn't want to

[00:05:24] [SPEAKER_00]: miss out on the next 15.

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_00]: The room I was renting was in a house with two other guys.

[00:05:30] [SPEAKER_00]: Becoming a homeowner would make me feel like a more serious person, I thought.

[00:05:35] [SPEAKER_00]: Getting my own place was a step up the maturity ladder.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_00]: I was 31 years old and single.

[00:05:42] [SPEAKER_00]: I thought a condo might help my dating life, too.

[00:05:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Right or wrong, I don't know.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_00]: That was a factor in my decision to buy the condo.

[00:05:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Unfortunately, I gave up a lot of freedoms when I bought my place.

[00:05:55] [SPEAKER_00]: My cash flow was gone.

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_00]: The goal I set to change careers to become a financial advisor was dead, too.

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_00]: I couldn't afford a career change.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_00]: But I justified the purchase because it was supposed to be the next step in life.

[00:06:10] [SPEAKER_00]: The plan was to travel the world, get a job, buy a home, settle down with a partner, raise

[00:06:15] [SPEAKER_00]: a family, then retire and travel the world again.

[00:06:19] [SPEAKER_00]: While living in that condo, I met my future wife through a friend who worked at a nearby

[00:06:23] [SPEAKER_00]: restaurant.

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_00]: We dated.

[00:06:25] [SPEAKER_00]: She moved in.

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: We married.

[00:06:28] [SPEAKER_00]: This financial mistake became the place where we began our lives together.

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_00]: If I hadn't bought the condo when I did, I never would have met Mrs. Retire Before Dad

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_00]: and we wouldn't have the life we share today with our kids.

[00:06:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Upward over the mountain.

[00:06:43] [SPEAKER_00]: When I bought the condo, I still had one foot planted in the past.

[00:06:48] [SPEAKER_00]: I wasn't ready to be an owner.

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_00]: I tell potential homebuyers to be sure you're ready.

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Most first-time homebuyers barely know what they're getting into.

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Today, I'm much more grounded in the present.

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Being a family man in the suburbs is exactly where I want to be.

[00:07:06] [SPEAKER_00]: But we have a mountain to climb before we can be free to live without the constraints

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_00]: of time and money.

[00:07:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Sharing your life with someone else, starting a family together, and raising children requires

[00:07:18] [SPEAKER_00]: sacrifices.

[00:07:19] [SPEAKER_00]: We've chosen to give our kids a childhood similar to those that our parents gave to

[00:07:24] [SPEAKER_00]: us.

[00:07:25] [SPEAKER_00]: A home in the suburbs, good schools, a safe and friendly community, summers playing at

[00:07:30] [SPEAKER_00]: the pool, vacations at the beach, and a non-working parent to enable all the fun.

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_00]: We chose this lifestyle knowing its costs and constraints.

[00:07:41] [SPEAKER_00]: Plenty more days of exploring the unusual are still ahead, both as a family and as empty

[00:07:47] [SPEAKER_00]: nesters.

[00:07:48] [SPEAKER_00]: But we're willing to wait a few years while we maximize financial security by investing

[00:07:54] [SPEAKER_00]: for retirement, building income streams, and saving for college.

[00:07:59] [SPEAKER_00]: That's where we are today.

[00:08:01] [SPEAKER_00]: In the meantime, this summer reminds me of one of mine as a kid, spending entire days

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_00]: at the pool with friends, playing release at night in the neighborhood, and having very

[00:08:11] [SPEAKER_00]: few responsibilities.

[00:08:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Our only limitations were the creativity of our play and the calendar days left before

[00:08:19] [SPEAKER_00]: the start of the school year.

[00:08:21] [SPEAKER_00]: Now I get to watch my children experience it too, over and over again.

[00:08:30] [SPEAKER_00]: You just listened to the post titled, Life Without The Constraints Of Time And Money

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_00]: by Craig Stevens of retirebeforedad.com and I'll be right back with my commentary.

[00:08:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Buy low, sell high.

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Buy low, sell high.

[00:08:46] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a simple concept, but not necessarily an easy concept.

[00:08:51] [SPEAKER_00]: Right now, high interest rates have crushed the real estate market.

[00:08:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Prices are falling and properties are available at a discount, which means Fundrise believes

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[00:09:41] [SPEAKER_00]: This is a paid advertisement.

[00:09:44] [SPEAKER_00]: I like to think that life offers a buffet of potential experiences, and at different

[00:09:51] [SPEAKER_00]: times of our lives, we're invited to eat from different areas of the buffet.

[00:09:57] [SPEAKER_00]: The experience of putting down work as we know it for longer than a weekend or typical

[00:10:02] [SPEAKER_00]: vacation can be life-changing.

[00:10:05] [SPEAKER_00]: If you can set yourself up financially to take a sabbatical or an extended period away

[00:10:11] [SPEAKER_00]: from W-2 work, I highly recommend it.

[00:10:15] [SPEAKER_00]: I experienced this when I walked the Camino, which is a 500-mile trek across northern Spain.

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_00]: I took two months off of work, and not only that, I made myself completely inaccessible

[00:10:28] [SPEAKER_00]: during this time.

[00:10:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Before this trip, I rarely took vacations.

[00:10:33] [SPEAKER_00]: I would often have unused vacation time at the end of the year.

[00:10:37] [SPEAKER_00]: And even when I did take a vacation, I would often work anyway so that I would have less

[00:10:42] [SPEAKER_00]: email to dig out of when I got back.

[00:10:46] [SPEAKER_00]: Walking the Camino was my first real experience of truly not working, and it was extremely

[00:10:53] [SPEAKER_00]: eye-opening.

[00:10:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Stepping away from work helped me see how much of my self-worth was tied to professional

[00:11:00] [SPEAKER_00]: achievements.

[00:11:02] [SPEAKER_00]: It helped me experience myself without any demands, and I discovered things about myself

[00:11:08] [SPEAKER_00]: that I'm much better for.

[00:11:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Putting down traditional work created space.

[00:11:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Space to decompress, space to reflect, and space to learn.

[00:11:19] [SPEAKER_00]: Our culture tends to put work up on a pedestal and insinuates that if you're not hustling

[00:11:26] [SPEAKER_00]: to achieve something, you must be lazy.

[00:11:29] [SPEAKER_00]: This is common criticism for people who retire early, as if they aspire to sit down and do

[00:11:36] [SPEAKER_00]: nothing.

[00:11:37] [SPEAKER_00]: But giving yourself some space from work to experience something else just might lead

[00:11:43] [SPEAKER_00]: to more fulfillment from work when you get back to it.

[00:11:47] [SPEAKER_00]: And that should do it for today.

[00:11:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Have a happy rest of your day, and I'll see you on the Tuesday show tomorrow, where your

[00:11:53] [SPEAKER_00]: optimal life awaits.