3070: Stealth Wealth Fail AND The Wall Of Fear by Doc G of Earn And Invest on Success with Money

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[00:00:30] This is Optimal Finance Daily. Stealth Wealth Fail by Doc G of EarnAndInvest.com I loved my Prius. I'm not a car guy. I'm really not. But when my Prius started to fail after 120,000 miles, I took an active interest in picking my new mode of transportation. I had a few caveats. I was driving 100 miles a day and wanted either a hybrid or fully electric car.

[00:01:00] And I needed something safe for the snow. Preferably four-wheel drive. My first instinct was to get another Prius. In fact, a full electric model would be perfect. I loved the brand. It drove nicely. The maintenance was reasonable. I certainly liked the price. Yet I couldn't pull the trigger.

[00:01:19] My previous car would slide in the icy winter weather. And I was concerned that an accident was just a slip away. After a few weeks back and forth and a number of test drives, my wife finally piped in. Why don't you get a Tesla? My immediate reaction was negative. Why spend so much money on an asset that sorely depreciates? This was before I became aware of the Phi community, but my mind was still in the right place.

[00:01:47] But she had a point. Teslas are super safe, available in four-wheel drive, and were the only model at the time that allowed the kind of range I was looking for. I couldn't believe what I was doing. Any doubts disappeared with the test drive. It was butter. Imagine my complete indifference to cars erased in a matter of minutes. The way it leapt forward with just a small push on the acceleration and then stopped just as fast when my foot released.

[00:02:17] The shape, the lack of sound, the cool electronic gadgets on the inside. Intoxicated, unwittingly drugged with finesse and speed. Drunk on power and control. Mere minutes later, I was putting down the first payment and ordering a little beauty of my own. This was so unlike me. I don't wear expensive clothes or jewelry.

[00:02:42] In fact, I rarely buy anything for myself other than food and the most minimal bare necessities. It's not that I couldn't afford more. Like most of the Phi community, material things just don't excite me. Stuff rarely nourishes my inner needs or brings anything more than the most transitory flex of happiness. The Tesla arrives and everything changes. And it is everything.

[00:03:07] Two years later, 40,000 on the odometer, and I feel a flash of pleasure every time I climb into the front seat. This non-car guy is now a car guy. It's carried me through thrashes of rain and blizzards of snow, stopping on a dime, rarely slipping. This is by far the most advanced car I've ever driven. And so the story ends happily ever after. Or not.

[00:03:33] You see, everything changed after I pulled up in that technological beauty. Friends, family, colleagues, and associates looked at me differently. They all commented on the car. Then I was dropped from two lucrative directorships for no clear reason. Social situations became awkward, and I could sense a new tension with friends and neighbors. Was it the Tesla? Was I just dreaming?

[00:03:59] Maybe stealth wealth was my comfortable modus operandi, and now I felt unnecessarily exposed. It's all possible. I may never know. No matter how much I love the car, no matter how much I enjoy each place it takes me, if I had to do it over again, I wouldn't. I would have gotten another Prius. The Wall of Fear by Doc G of earnandinvest.com

[00:04:28] My mother, the accountant, threw out 10 million. With 10 million, you'll have nothing to fear. And I just took it, accepted it, calculated the number of years, and I was off. But it didn't feel right. So I asked my financial advisor. A few weeks later, and after much information was solicited, I was given an 85% chance of my money lasting through retirement. He went on and on about Monte Carlo and all sorts of other rubbish, and I accepted it. See? Nothing to fear.

[00:04:57] I put my head down and went back to work. I kept saving, kept investing. But it didn't feel right. The accountant had a number, but never really asked how much I wanted to spend each month. The financial advisor asked about my spending, but refused to consider my investment in real estate in the equation. The confusion swirled, and my anxiety and fear increased at a faster rate than my net worth. So I went to the internet and found all the websites that I'm sure you're familiar with.

[00:05:26] There, I discovered the 4% rule, the 3.5% rule, and 25 times. I calculated and recalculated. I played around on fire calc. My conclusion over and over again was the same. I had nothing to fear. Enough. I have enough. Comfortably enough. But don't think the journey didn't change me.

[00:05:50] I fired my financial advisor, saved me $18,000 a year, and moved my investments to Vanguard. I canceled my life insurance policy, $3,000. My car could be charged at the local dealership, $1,000 plus free coffee. I became a master of mint. I signed up for personal capital. My life now optimized, my side hustles in place, I was ready to retire. Yet, I couldn't. It was not that I love being a doctor so much.

[00:06:20] I don't. It's something much more sinister. The wall of fear has overtaken me. I have scaled a lifetime to reach the top, but now am paralyzed by the height. How do I move forward? I have become a victim of the what ifs. What if the market crashes? What if real estate evaporates? What if I can't find healthcare? And then the more difficult questions. Am I anything outside of being a doctor?

[00:06:50] What if this is the best it gets? Will my life have lost meaning? As my mind turns, the one more year phenomenon bursts into my psyche. Next thing I know, I'm volunteering for extra shifts, more consulting. The money piles up. Maybe I should travel more, spend more time with the kids, start a blog. But then I stand atop the wall and only see a path leading down, not up. I want to keep moving up.

[00:07:23] You just listened to the post titled, Stealth Wealth Fail and The Wall of Fear. Both by Doc G of earnandinvest.com. And now a word from our sponsors at Betterment. When investing your money starts to feel like a second job, Betterment steps in with a little work-life balance. They're an automated investing and savings app, which means they do the work. While they build and manage your portfolio, you build and manage your weekend plans.

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[00:09:38] I found the article about the Tesla so interesting because it didn't go where I thought it was going to. And frankly, I feel a bit conflicted about it. On one hand, I do think luxury is a weakness, and it's a slippery slope to get too much satisfaction from material possessions. On the other hand, Doc G spent his money on something he really loved. That car brought him a lot of joy.

[00:10:03] And it's a little sad to me that he let other people's opinion of him ruin a good thing. We mostly talk about this phenomenon when it comes to being modest about our material possessions. Many of us worry that if we don't have a nice car or clothes or house, that people will judge us for it. When I've talked about this in the past on this show, I'd say things like, other people's opinions of you are none of your business. And I stand by that.

[00:10:29] I think we need to manage our money in a way that aligns with our values, not in a way that pleases our social circles. So Doc G, if you're listening to this, I'd encourage you to go ahead and enjoy the car. If people treat you differently for it, perhaps it's time to find some new people. Because as the famous quote goes, those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

[00:10:55] And I'll say this about fear and the what ifs that can paralyze us when it comes to big decisions about money, work, and our livelihood. What if you let your greatest fear be the pain of unrealized potential versus the fear of what could go wrong? Once you reach a certain point of financial stability, continuing to work in a job you don't love has much higher opportunity costs. And while the reward for financial independence might be an existential crisis,

[00:11:26] what if we trusted that what's on the other side of that wall of fear is worth the climb? That'll do it for another edition of Optimal Finance Daily. Thank you for continuing to listen. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll see you tomorrow where optimal life awaits. Thank you. Thank you.