3595: Financial Advice From the In-Flight Safety Handbook by Brad with BudgetsAreSexy on Financial Preparedness

[00:00:00] This Father's Day, do more with Dad and spend less with low prices guaranteed at The Home Depot. Get him fired up with a new grill and accessories, like the NexGrill 5 Burner for just $299 so you can spend more time together while he becomes the grill master he was always meant to be. Or build memories with savings on top brand power tools so you can tackle projects side by side. Gift more and do more together this Father's Day with help from The Home Depot. Exclusions apply. See homedeepot.com slash price match for details.

[00:00:30] Study and play. Come together on a Windows 11 PC. And for a limited time, college students get the best of both worlds. Get the Unreal College Deal. Everything you need to study and play with select Windows 11 PCs. Eligible students get a year of Microsoft 365 Premium and a year of Xbox Game Pass Ultimate with a custom color Xbox wireless controller. Learn more at windows.com slash student offer. While supplies last. Ends June 30th. Terms at aka.ms slash college PC.

[00:01:00] This is Optimal Finance Daily. Financial advice from the In-Flight Safety Handbook by Brad with BudgetsAreSexy.com. I know what you're thinking. How in the world can an In-Flight Safety Handbook help me financially? I want to focus today on one specific part of those instructions. Skip ahead to the part about securing your oxygen mask in case of changes in the cabin pressure.

[00:01:24] Now, I know you're really confused, but bear with me. After hearing many stories of financial struggle and dealing with the raw emotions that come with it, I want to discuss something that seems to be a pretty common issue among struggling families. I've received more than a dozen comments about this issue just over the past six months, so I finally decided to write about it. Do you tend to worry more about those around you?

[00:01:49] No, I'm not talking about your husband, your wife, or young children. I'm talking about other family and even friends. One of the most common reasons I hear for people not being able to save an emergency fund or keep one once they have it is that they're constantly helping others. Every time they turn around, they see someone in need and feel obligated to help. Their compassion and guilt will not allow them to look the other way.

[00:02:11] They feel there is no choice. So if we have figured out that the reason we cannot help ourselves is because we're too busy helping others, then at least we recognize the problem. You have two choices. You either keep helping or stop helping. Here is where the rest of the oxygen mask instructions come in handy. Quote, remember to secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others with theirs. End quote.

[00:02:36] Quote, why do they tell you to do that? It's not because they don't care about the person you may have to help. It's because you have a better chance at helping them once you're sucking back some oxygen. You are no good to anyone if you pass out. Secure your own mask, then be compassionate. You'll be in a better position to do so. Secure your own mask first. So how can you apply this to your financial situation?

[00:03:02] That's easy. Save an emergency fund for yourself before you start passing out money like you don't need it. Secure your own future first, because before you know it, that oxygen mask won't be enough. And retirement will be right around the corner. Wait just a second, though. Once you have that emergency fund in place, it doesn't mean you're home free. Your oxygen mask may not yet be properly secured. There is more work to be done. Your emergency fund is to be used when you have an emergency.

[00:03:30] If you have extra money in your budget to help out that month and it doesn't require the use of your security fund, then by all means, help out. Using your emergency fund to help out is like putting your oxygen mask on someone else. Where does that leave you? Think about it. You want to help, and Lord knows I want you to help, but you have to do it right so you can be the most effective. What about compassion? Am I asking you to let your elderly parents starve to death? Absolutely not.

[00:04:00] What I am asking you to do is consider other alternatives. Is there another way to help that doesn't include playing financial roulette? Sure there is. You just have to find it. You certainly won't find it if you don't look for it. I volunteer with my church's mercy team, and when someone needs a financial push in the right direction, I'm right there. That's not all they do, though. They help people with rent and mortgage, groceries, electric bills, other utilities, and more.

[00:04:28] I also happen to know that there are so many other churches and organizations that are ready to step in and help out in tough financial situations. If your elderly parents fail to pay the rent, call around. Someone, somewhere will help you. Dealing with leeches There is another component to this topic. Leeches should be the easiest to deal with, just for the simple fact that they live off of the sweat of others, which sometimes makes it easier to pull the plug.

[00:04:57] They most often are kids, which makes it tough for the parents because they feel even more guilty. Leeches play off that guilt, and will suck it dry until it's time to find their next unsuspecting host. I've seen it so many times. Heck, it's in my family. I've sure been irresponsibly immature with my money before. I was always broke, too. Typical story. Child-adult is bad at managing his money. When he does have money, he's too busy buying things to make him happy instead of acting responsibly.

[00:05:27] Perhaps said kid still lives with mommy, and mommy continues to wipe his mouth every time he makes a mess. The parent in that situation is enabling bad behavior, and even encouraging it. What that kid needs is a job and some financial management classes, not someone to coddle him in the name of helping him. One of the best books you can find on setting boundaries in your relationships was written by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, and it's called, you guessed it, Boundaries.

[00:05:55] This book will show you how to help in the right way, at the right time, and as you see fit. You must set boundaries. P.S. Boundaries are not having your 40-year-old son, who still lives at home, running to mommy every time he gets a cell phone bill. Conclusion. You cannot be there for everyone all the time, no matter how hard you try. Sometimes you just have to take a step back and find another way to help those in need. Sometimes people need to be allowed to help themselves, you know, like you, for instance.

[00:06:25] You're not blessing others by destroying yourself. If you don't have the money, then you just can't do it, and I would personally qualify not having your own emergency fund as not having the money. You need that first, then you need some extra money to help save those around you. It's equally important to know when you're hurting someone rather than helping them. Work harder at getting yourself in a position to offer assistance. As they say, save yourself. Now you can save the world. Until then, learn how to say no.

[00:06:54] Give it a try. I bet you'll make great progress, and you'll feel a lot better about your situation after you do. Good luck. You just listened to the post titled Financial Advice from the In-Flight Safety Handbook by Brad with BudgetsAreSexy.com. My philosophy with money? It's a tool for freedom, not a source of anxiety. Wealthfront helps you tune out the noise and earn more on every dollar with a high-yield cash account and sophisticated, easy-to-use investing products.

[00:07:24] The Wealthfront Cash Account offers an industry-leading APY, no monthly fees, and easy transfers to Wealthfront's expert-built investing products. Right now, you can earn up to 4.3% variable APY on your uninvested cash in the Wealthfront Cash Account. You start with a 3.3% base APY from program banks. New cash account clients can get an OFD-exclusive 0.75% APY boost

[00:07:51] for your first three months on up to $150,000 balance. Then you can add another 0.25% APY increase above the base APY, no expiration date or balance limit, just by enabling direct deposit of $1,000 a month, plus open, fund, and maintain an investing account. Join the million-plus people trusting Wealthfront. Visit wealthfront.com slash OFD. Terms and conditions apply. This is a paid endorsement of Wealthfront. Client experiences will vary.

[00:08:21] Wealthfront brokerage is not a bank. The base APY is as of January 30th, 2026, and subject to change. For more information, please see the episode description. Do you hear that? Sounds like breakfast is ready. Because Quaker's coming in hot with morning nutrition, 100% whole grain oats, and a good source of fiber to fuel the rhythm of your morning and kickstart your day.

[00:08:47] And that sounds absolutely delicious. Fuel to start whatever's next. Quaker, official sponsor of FIFA World Cup 26. Hey! Hey! Hey! Brad is a guest author on Budgets Are Sexy. He's the creator of EnemyOfDebt.com, a personal finance blog motivating and inspiring financial discipline by focusing on behavior and truth. Brad hopes by teaching personal responsibility, debt-free principles,

[00:09:17] and the importance of planning, people can learn how to take control of their finances one step at a time. So you can check out EnemyOfDebt.com for more from Brad. I've found that if you offer monetary assistance begrudgingly or with any kind of resentment because you're fearful of how it might affect your own financial situation, it can lead to problems in the relationship. It can also be tough to determine what is helpful and what is enabling. So here's an example. I had a friend in high school

[00:09:46] who was a little bit older than me and she was behind on her car payments. She needed $900 to get caught up because she was paying $450 per month for a brand new car that she clearly couldn't afford. I was saving for my own car, but I wouldn't need that money for a good six months. So I decided I'd help her with the understanding that she would pay me back before I needed the money to buy my own car. Now this friend of mine was working at a pizza parlor. She wasn't having a temporary money issue.

[00:10:16] She was living outside her means and actually just couldn't afford this brand new car. It was like pulling teeth trying to get her to pay me back and the relationship ended over it. Now looking back on it, I probably would have been more helpful to her by not lending her the money. I could have helped her work on applications for higher paying jobs or think about how to cut other expenses or offer to give her rides to work so she could get rid of this car she couldn't afford. All that being said,

[00:10:46] there are so many other ways to give that many times can be more powerful than money. Give your time and talents. Volunteer. Be present as emotional support for someone. Having compassion for others and wanting to help is a wonderful quality. Let's just make sure that it's deployed in ways that are actually helpful. That should do it for another edition of Optimal Finance Daily. I'll be back tomorrow as usual, so I'll see you there where optimal life awaits.