2241: 3 Powerful Rituals for Building New, Healthy Relationships by Angel Chernoff of Marc and Angel on Dating & Friendship

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: This is Optimal Relationships Daily, episode 2241, 3 Powerful Rituals for Building New, Healthy

[00:00:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Relationships by Angel Chernoff of MarcandAngel.com

[00:00:12] [SPEAKER_00]: Hello everybody!

[00:00:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm your host and narrator Greg Audino, and this is ORD, or Optimal Relationships Daily,

[00:00:19] [SPEAKER_00]: one of the five daily shows we offer here in the Optimal Living Daily Podcast Network,

[00:00:23] [SPEAKER_00]: which all cover different facets of personal development.

[00:00:26] [SPEAKER_00]: As always, I have an article for you today that I will read and then offer my commentary on.

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_00]: So with that, let's hear this post from Angel Chernoff as we optimize your life.

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_00]: 3 Powerful Rituals for Building New, Healthy Relationships by Angel Chernoff of MarcandAngel.com

[00:00:48] [SPEAKER_00]: This is one of the most important posts I could ever write for you.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_00]: It's super simple but absolutely vital.

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_00]: Recently, Marc and I had a conversation with our friend Tan about the importance of establishing

[00:01:01] [SPEAKER_00]: healthy, positive supportive relationships.

[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_00]: This is a topic that fascinates us, and it's something we know a lot about.

[00:01:09] [SPEAKER_00]: As I've mentioned in previous posts and emails, Marc and I met Tan at a business

[00:01:13] [SPEAKER_00]: conference in Las Vegas some years back.

[00:01:16] [SPEAKER_00]: We hit it off as friends almost immediately.

[00:01:19] [SPEAKER_00]: There was lots of synergy between our interests and personal development and in expanding

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_00]: our entrepreneurial business ventures.

[00:01:26] [SPEAKER_00]: But the kicker is the immense and immediate positive impact Tan's friendship has had on

[00:01:31] [SPEAKER_00]: both our personal and professional growth.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_00]: The undeniable truth became crystal clear to us rather quickly, who you associate with

[00:01:40] [SPEAKER_00]: makes all the difference in your life.

[00:01:43] [SPEAKER_00]: In many ways, we as human beings are like koi fish.

[00:01:47] [SPEAKER_00]: The koi fish grows in proportion to its environment.

[00:01:51] [SPEAKER_00]: If you keep it in a small bucket of water, it grows to only a few inches in length.

[00:01:56] [SPEAKER_00]: But if you let it loosen the wild, it can grow up to two feet long.

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_00]: So are you like the koi fish that has been kept in a small bucket?

[00:02:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Is your environment and social network stifling your personal and professional growth?

[00:02:09] [SPEAKER_00]: If so, how do you make changes and build healthier relationships?

[00:02:14] [SPEAKER_00]: During our conversation with Tan, all three of us agree that it's not hard to build

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_00]: and nurture healthy relationships, as long as you are willing to uphold three essential

[00:02:24] [SPEAKER_00]: rituals for doing so.

[00:02:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Number one, practice walking alone on your own two feet.

[00:02:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Ironically, the prerequisite to building healthy relationships is being comfortable when you're

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_00]: all by yourself.

[00:02:37] [SPEAKER_00]: Appreciating solitude starts with the conscious awareness of the freedom it brings.

[00:02:42] [SPEAKER_00]: When you enjoy your own company, you don't need others around for the mere sake of

[00:02:46] [SPEAKER_00]: having others around.

[00:02:48] [SPEAKER_00]: You can be flexible about who you choose to spend time with.

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Instead of letting your fear of being alone suck you into social situations and relationships

[00:02:56] [SPEAKER_00]: that are not right for you.

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_00]: With that said, however, journeying through life on your own two feet is a learning process.

[00:03:04] [SPEAKER_00]: You become stronger as you go.

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_00]: It's like a kid who can't find her way home when she's alone.

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Doing it the first few times is daunting and scary, but in the long run she is

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_00]: safer and better off having learned the way.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_00]: So just remember, it's always better to learn to stand on your own two feet and walk alone

[00:03:23] [SPEAKER_00]: when you must rather than have someone carry you around your whole life.

[00:03:28] [SPEAKER_00]: And once you are reasonably self-sufficient, then relying on someone else from time to

[00:03:32] [SPEAKER_00]: time is an active inner strength, not weakness.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_00]: Number two, practice generosity.

[00:03:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Find little ways to help people.

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Be friendly and introduce yourself to someone new when the opportunity arises.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Come from a place of generosity.

[00:03:49] [SPEAKER_00]: Focus on how you can help them.

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have information that could benefit them?

[00:03:54] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you have a skill that could assist them through their current situation?

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_00]: Do you know someone who they should meet?

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_00]: One of the best investments you can make in yourself is to take a genuine interest

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_00]: in other people.

[00:04:06] [SPEAKER_00]: The more you help others, the more they will want to help you.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Love and kindness begets love and kindness, and so on and so forth.

[00:04:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Ultimately the happiest and most successful people are always looking for ways to help others,

[00:04:21] [SPEAKER_00]: while the unhappiest and most unsuccessful people are still asking what's in it for me.

[00:04:26] [SPEAKER_00]: And number three, practice putting yourself out there in the right social settings.

[00:04:32] [SPEAKER_00]: The best places to plant new seeds of friendship are at organized events,

[00:04:36] [SPEAKER_00]: covering particular topics that interest you.

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_00]: For example, a good event might be a community focus group,

[00:04:43] [SPEAKER_00]: a professional association meeting, a fitness class, a weekly group meditation hour,

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_00]: or any other gathering of people who share common values and goals.

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_00]: The bottom line is that finding the right group of people that share your values and goals

[00:04:57] [SPEAKER_00]: may require some time and effort, but it is worth it.

[00:05:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Finding a community of like-minded souls is the most effective component

[00:05:05] [SPEAKER_00]: in building positive, lasting relationships.

[00:05:09] [SPEAKER_00]: Next steps for building new, healthy relationships.

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_00]: If the aforementioned points make sense to you, but you're still struggling with what seems to be

[00:05:18] [SPEAKER_00]: unhealthy, unsupportive relationships in your life, then I have a suggestion for you.

[00:05:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Make a list of the five people you spend the most time with,

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_00]: and your top three personal and professional values and goals.

[00:05:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Then compare the lists.

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_00]: Are the people you spend the most time with congruent with your values and goals?

[00:05:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Are you and your daily rituals congruent with your values and goals?

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_00]: If not, it's time to make some positive changes.

[00:05:46] [SPEAKER_00]: It's time to get comfortable and proficient standing on your own two feet,

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_00]: reaching out to others with a helping hand, and meeting some brand new,

[00:05:54] [SPEAKER_00]: like-minded people that can bring positive energy into your life.

[00:05:59] [SPEAKER_00]: A few years ago, Mark and I actually moved from San Diego to Austin

[00:06:03] [SPEAKER_00]: to live near Tan and other inspiring, like-minded entrepreneurs in the personal development niche,

[00:06:09] [SPEAKER_00]: because we knew we needed to be surrounded by the right people and energy

[00:06:12] [SPEAKER_00]: while we were making some significant lifestyle and business changes.

[00:06:17] [SPEAKER_00]: And let me assure you, we experienced incredible productive breakthroughs because of it.

[00:06:23] [SPEAKER_00]: The bottom line is that you need to get your mindset and rituals in order,

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: and spend some time in a positive environment with positive people.

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_00]: You just listened to the post titled,

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Three Powerful Rituals for Building New Healthy Relationships

[00:06:41] [SPEAKER_00]: by Angel Shurnoff of MarkandAngel.com,

[00:06:45] [SPEAKER_00]: and I'll be right back with my comments.

[00:06:47] [SPEAKER_00]: And thank you so much to Angel for this enlightening post today.

[00:06:51] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a post that I think is relatively easy to put to practice,

[00:06:55] [SPEAKER_00]: which is a great part of their writing.

[00:06:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Always delivering inspiring lessons without much complication.

[00:07:02] [SPEAKER_00]: However, a problem we might run into if we're not careful is whether or not we can look at the

[00:07:09] [SPEAKER_00]: people around us objectively. Sometimes we have so much trouble either letting people go

[00:07:14] [SPEAKER_00]: or fully understanding people that it's really difficult to tell whether or not those we spend

[00:07:20] [SPEAKER_00]: our time with are actually aligned with us when it comes to our goals, values, or whatever.

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_00]: So I do think that while this post definitely packs a punch,

[00:07:31] [SPEAKER_00]: one's ability to successfully apply its teachings is predicated on how effectively and how honestly

[00:07:37] [SPEAKER_00]: we can consider those around us. It's easier said than done, but one place to start could be

[00:07:43] [SPEAKER_00]: listening to how others speak about those around you versus how you see them.

[00:07:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Are you constantly standing up for them or telling a lot of people that they have

[00:07:52] [SPEAKER_00]: the wrong idea about them? That could be a sign that you might not have a totally full

[00:07:57] [SPEAKER_00]: understanding of who they are. But with that, we're going to wrap things up for today everyone.

[00:08:02] [SPEAKER_00]: As always, I thank you for being here and making another post possible.

[00:08:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Enjoy the rest of your day and be sure to come back tomorrow and join us again

[00:08:09] [SPEAKER_00]: where your optimal life awaits.