2261: Life Skills: How to Teach Your Kids to Organize by Julie Morgenstern on Parenting Advice & Parent Lessons

[00:00:00] This is Optimal Relationships Daily, Episode 2261, Life Skills, How to Teach Your Kids to Organize by Julie Morgenstern of JulieMorgenstern.com Hello everybody and thanks so much for joining today. It's another Parenting episode of O-R-D

[00:00:17] and I am your host and narrator Greg Audino. Great to have you here for an article that is sure to help parents maintain some of their sanity as we'll be learning about how to teach children

[00:00:27] to organize complete with an age-by-age breakdown of instructions. So listen closely as we get into the post now and optimize your life. Life Skills, How to Teach Your Kids to Organize by JulieMorgenstern of JulieMorgenstern.com

[00:00:48] There's only one thing more frustrating than not being able to clear your own clutter and that is coming home at the end of a stressful day and being confronted with your

[00:00:57] kids' mess. It feels like facing your own failure as a parent. You want to teach them a life skill that you know will make their life easier and lead to more success, but how can you teach

[00:01:08] something that you yourself don't even know how to do? Believe it or not, organizing is not an innate talent. It can be learned. And yes, even if you never mastered this life skill, you can facilitate your child's mastery of organizing. Start by spending time together

[00:01:24] working on something small like the fridge or front hall closet, then tackle their bedroom together. Organizing a child's room is one of the best ways to get to know them because it's a window into how

[00:01:36] they think and what's important and what's no longer of interest to them as they evolve and grow. The key to successfully organizing a kid's room is involving your child in the project

[00:01:47] as much as possible. As tempted as you may be to sneak in there with a dumpster to clear out all the quote-unquote junk, long-range success comes only through allowing your child to participate

[00:01:58] in the design, transformation, and maintenance of his or her own space. Kids love to solve problems, which is what organizing is all about. And provided you stay calm and supportive, rather than judgmental, your child will enjoy the special attention and time together with you.

[00:02:16] Yes, organizing can actually serve to strengthen your relationship. Here is an age-by-age guide to organizing lessons. Preschool kids 2-5 years old Help your kid learn the concept that all items have homes. At this stage, you are undoubtedly in

[00:02:33] the lead. Your job is to set up systems and your kid's job is to help clean up and put away toys before moving on to the next task. Be cheerful with your messaging by narrating

[00:02:44] how you do this with everyday items. I'm putting the brush back here so we can find it next time we need it, and involve them in putting every item back in its place. School-aged kids 6-10 years old

[00:02:57] From age 5-10, kids can learn to rearrange their own things. The first step to creating a successful organizing system is to group similar items. Here's the kicker. For the system to be successful for your child, items should be grouped based on the way that they think.

[00:03:14] Not the way that you think. Creating their own unique system enables them to always know where to find and put items. Start with things they use every day, such as clothes, do they look for

[00:03:25] things by type of clothing, by color of clothing, or by occasion, like school weekend and dressy. Books, by subject, type or alphabetical order. School papers, by class, due date, in progress or completed. Once their unique system has been designed, they can be held

[00:03:45] accountable for maintaining it. Tweens 11-13 years old The tween years are a big transition time when kids' rooms tend to get really messy as they transition gradually between little kid belongings and new more grown up items. Teach kids how to identify and preserve the most meaningful

[00:04:05] memorabilia and give away the rest to make room for the new clothes, books, hobbies that are important to them now. Decluttering the obsolete can be an empowering experience. It creates space for them to reflect on who they were, who they are, and who they want to become.

[00:04:23] Teenagers 14-18 years old As kids get older and more social, they begin to understand the value of organization to support a busy life and stretch hard earned dollars. Learning to care for, store, and access their favorite

[00:04:39] possessions aligns with their motivations to look good, feel good, and always be ready to go, go, go. When kids learn how to get organized, there are fewer frantic searches for homework, soccer cleats, and backpacks in the morning. Teaching your kids how to set up systems

[00:04:55] will make it easy for them to find what they need when they need it, feel comfortable in their space, and spend time on the things that are important to them. Don't expect instant results. Organizing is a process, mastered and refined over a lifetime.

[00:05:10] Do your best to make it a positive experience and build their confidence as you coach them along the way. Eliminate the phrases, you are so disorganized, you are such a slob. Clean your room, it's a pig's die. Everybody is organized in some ways. Identify and recognize the

[00:05:28] ways in which your child is organized, and repeat to them constantly and confidently. You just listened to the post titled, Life Skills How to Teach Your Kids to Organize by Julie Morgenstern of JulieMorgenstern.com

[00:05:46] and hang on I'll be right back with my commentary. And a big thanks to Julie for this age by age guide which are so effective in these parenting posts. This idea of gamification is so helpful

[00:05:58] and another thing to keep in mind that keeps kids and people of all ages motivated is what she mentioned at the end, reinforcement. So once your children do cooperate and organize

[00:06:08] the way you'd like them to, let them know how thankful you are. Speak to how helpful they are and how attentive they are and what a big part of the household they are. You know our use

[00:06:19] of language, even very subtle language, is a tremendously underrated tool when it comes to learning of any kind. So the more you can speak in such a way that lets your kids know that

[00:06:31] their efforts are valued and appreciated, as opposed to taking more of a, well it's the least you could do type of tone, the more enthusiastic they'll be about contributing in the future. But that'll do it for today here on Optimal Relationships Daily. Thank you

[00:06:46] as always for being here parents and do be sure to come back and do the same tomorrow because there's going to be another parenting post for you. And that's where your optimal life awaits.