2312: What If My Spouse's Eating Habits Are Triggering to Me? By Crystal Karges on Marriage & Healthy Living

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Hello everybody and thank you so much for joining me here on another weekly bonus episode of ORD.

[00:00:06] [SPEAKER_00]: I'm your host Greg Audino and in this week's Sunday Extra, we're going to be sharing an old episode from Optimal Health Daily.

[00:00:13] [SPEAKER_00]: I think you're going to like this one. So without further ado, let's hear Dr. Neal's narration and commentary as we optimize your life.

[00:00:24] [SPEAKER_01]: What if my spouse's eating habits are triggering to me by Crystal Karges of CrystalKarges.com

[00:00:31] [SPEAKER_01]: Whether you are an eating disorder recovery or practicing intuitive eating, you may notice how you have become more aware of the dieting culture around you.

[00:00:39] [SPEAKER_01]: This may include eating habits of loved ones in your life who may not be practicing your newfound way of eating and living.

[00:00:47] [SPEAKER_01]: How can you sustain the changes you've made for yourself if your spouse, partner or loved ones are still engaged in a dieting mentality or have abnormal eating behaviors themselves?

[00:00:57] [SPEAKER_01]: This is often a point of struggle for many who may have proactively made the choice to heal from a chaotic past of dieting and move toward a more peaceful relationship with food and body.

[00:01:10] [SPEAKER_01]: Making this decision means learning how to work through situations that can be potentially triggering, including how to navigate diet culture when you're encountering it on a daily basis.

[00:01:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Because the truth is, even though you have made the decision and choice to say goodbye to dieting or to be committed to your eating disorder recovery, there will be people in your life who won't understand why or what you are doing.

[00:01:34] [SPEAKER_01]: The behaviors of those closest to you can become triggering, particularly if your loved one is entrenched in the dieting culture that you're working so hard to break free from.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_01]: Some behaviors that you might encounter with the loved ones in your home might include restrictive eating behaviors, yo-yo dieting or frequently going from one diet to another, recurring binge eating episodes, hoarding or hiding food, body shaming talk,

[00:02:01] [SPEAKER_01]: talking negatively about certain foods like calling certain foods good versus bad and food shaming, meaning getting shamed for your food choices.

[00:02:10] [SPEAKER_01]: It can be difficult to focus on maintaining your own recovery and healing journey when you encounter these types of scenarios from your loved ones.

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_01]: Here are some practical ways to help you through these potentially triggering situations that you might encounter in your own home.

[00:02:28] [SPEAKER_01]: It can be challenging to push through triggering situations, especially if you feel alone on your journey.

[00:02:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Always go back to the reason why you decided to make a change in the first place.

[00:02:39] [SPEAKER_01]: What motivates you to keep going, especially when times get hard?

[00:02:44] [SPEAKER_01]: A trigger can feel like a setback in some ways, but stand resolute in your commitment to yourself.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_01]: Ultimately, your motivation factors are stronger than a trigger.

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Even if you feel like your partner doesn't understand what you're experiencing as a result of their behaviors, it's still important to communicate your thoughts, feelings and needs.

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_01]: Establishing healthy boundaries with your spouse is essential to not only your relationship, but to your journey forward, finding peace with food and your body.

[00:03:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Setting healthy boundaries in your relationship can include clear communication about your needs, being specific and direct, advocating for yourself and speaking up when you think you've been disrespected.

[00:03:28] [SPEAKER_01]: Working on establishing appropriate boundaries with your loved ones can help you protect your recovery efforts.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_01]: While you cannot change your spouse, you can encourage open and honest discussions.

[00:03:43] [SPEAKER_01]: If your spouse is engaging in behaviors that are triggering to you, use it as an opportunity to invite them into a meaningful discussion, if you feel ready to do so.

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_01]: Let them know why their behavior is upsetting and how they might be able to better support you.

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_01]: You may also share about the changes you're experiencing in your life as a result of giving up dieting, normalizing your eating habits and so on, and involve your spouse in the process.

[00:04:11] [SPEAKER_01]: Even if you've not been able to find support in your own family or partner, it's important to stay connected to like-minded individuals who are encouraging your efforts and helping you stay focused.

[00:04:20] [SPEAKER_01]: Whether this means meeting regularly with a professional, having an accountability group or friends that understand, make sure to build a support system that can help you when you feel like you're struggling.

[00:04:31] [SPEAKER_01]: A trigger can feel overwhelming in the moment, but remember to fall back on your positive coping skills to help you work through a challenging situation.

[00:04:40] [SPEAKER_01]: Rather than defaulting to chaotic eating habits, allow yourself to work through the discomfort and you will always come out stronger.

[00:04:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Triggers can be clues about areas in your life that may need some extra TLC, so be sure to take a mindful inventory of where you're at and what you need.

[00:04:57] [SPEAKER_01]: Stay committed to your journey toward food and body freedom. You deserve it.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_01]: You just listened to the post titled, What if my spouse's eating habits are triggering to me? by Crystal Kargis of CrystalKargis.com.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_01]: Dr. Neal here for my commentary.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_01]: Today's author, Crystal, was right when she said that support is so important when working through some of the difficult feelings that those with a disordered pattern of eating may be experiencing.

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_01]: In fact, researchers found that having relationships with others that provide empathy to you led to those with disordered eating to be more successful with their recovery from either bulimia nervosa or anorexia nervosa

[00:05:38] [SPEAKER_01]: when compared to those without these types of positive relationships.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_01]: So empathetic support from others is super important.

[00:05:47] [SPEAKER_01]: Researchers have also found that family members should focus on accepting and supporting their loved one as opposed to trying to get them to stop their disordered eating.

[00:05:56] [SPEAKER_01]: This probably sounds like the opposite of what someone would want to do, but that's where a team of health care professionals can be so helpful.

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_01]: A therapist, for example, can guide the patient and their partner with ways to cope during these instances where one may be triggered by the other's behavior.

[00:06:11] [SPEAKER_01]: All right, that'll do it for today. I hope you have a great Tuesday. Thank you so much for listening.

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_01]: And I'll be back here tomorrow as usual. So I'll see you there where your optimal life awaits.