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Episode 2350:
Carrie Williams Howe presents actionable tips for raising critical thinkers, focusing on nurturing curiosity and open-mindedness in children. By creating environments where questioning is encouraged and problem-solving is embraced, parents can help their children develop the cognitive tools to navigate and respond to a rapidly changing world with thoughtful awareness.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.gottman.com/blog/raise-critical-thinkers-world-desperately-needs/
Quotes to ponder:
"Curiosity is the cornerstone of critical thinking, and it’s up to us to nurture that in our children."
"Empathy allows children to see things from different perspectives, a crucial element of critical thinking."
"Help children explore their own thoughts, ask questions, and understand that it’s okay to challenge ideas."
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[00:00:00] This is Optimal Relationships Daily, How to Raise Critical Thinkers in a World That Desperately Needs Them by Carrie Williams Howe with Gottman.com
[00:00:11] Hello everybody, I am your personal narrator Greg Audino. If you're new here, parenting posts are usually scheduled towards the end of the week and during the rest of the time, anything goes.
[00:00:22] Today, I am sharing a post from the Gottman Institute, a post on why it's vital to encourage the skill of critical thinking in your kids.
[00:00:31] And if you'd like more helpful and inspirational life tips like the ones we'll talk about today, be sure to sign up to our mailing list at oldpodcast.com.
[00:00:39] As you can probably tell, we have all sorts of resources there for you.
[00:00:43] Enough of that though, we are going to get into this post and we are going to start optimizing your life.
[00:00:48] How to Raise Critical Thinkers in a World That Desperately Needs Them by Carrie Williams Howe with Gottman.com
[00:01:01] Our world is facing a lot of challenges, with even more coming.
[00:01:05] We need citizens and leaders who question things that are presented as fact, who ask critical and thoughtful questions of their leaders,
[00:01:13] and who think carefully about how they make decisions that impact their own and others' lives.
[00:01:17] In short, this world is in desperate need of strong critical thinkers.
[00:01:22] As a doctoral student, I spent four years studying college student and adult development,
[00:01:28] with a focus on whether innovative teaching and learning strategies were helping to foster critical thinking skills.
[00:01:34] I came to passionately believe that critical thinking skills are some of the most important skills we can emphasize in higher education.
[00:01:42] But as a parent, I became passionate about starting well before college.
[00:01:47] Learning to think critically and to make decisions based on those thinking skills is a lifelong pursuit.
[00:01:53] Even traditional-aged 18-24 year old college students do not always possess the complex analytical skills that allow them to balance their own needs with the needs of others,
[00:02:04] or to analyze the extent to which an expert's perspectives are well informed.
[00:02:08] We can't expect our young kids to achieve these skills right away either,
[00:02:12] but we can plant the seeds that will help them to be prepared for complex thinking as they grow older.
[00:02:18] In my studies, I found that critical thinking skills are developed when four conditions are in place.
[00:02:23] 1. The individual needs to feel that their contribution to knowledge development is welcomed within an environment of trust.
[00:02:31] 2. Learning experiences need to offer both challenges and support.
[00:02:37] 3. Development often emerges from unexpected or new experiences,
[00:02:42] in which a person needs supported time to reflect and process.
[00:02:46] 4. Educational experiences need to support both intellectual and emotional growth of the individual.
[00:02:54] So, how can we translate these conditions to our role as parents?
[00:02:59] Create an environment of trust in which your kids feel that their opinions are welcome.
[00:03:04] By asking your children to contribute to family discussions,
[00:03:07] you're helping them learn how to ask respectful questions of those in authority,
[00:03:11] like their doctors or teachers,
[00:03:13] and encouraging them to ask questions even if they worry that their questions are silly.
[00:03:18] 5. We can listen closely to their questions,
[00:03:21] stop what we are doing to engage in the conversation,
[00:03:24] compliment them on their curiosity,
[00:03:25] and let them know that we appreciate how hard they're thinking.
[00:03:29] 6. Instead of simply telling our children that their conclusions are wrong,
[00:03:33] we can ask them if they have considered alternative interpretations,
[00:03:36] or we can tell them what we think about when we make conclusions.
[00:03:40] 7. Offer challenges and support as your children navigate complicated concepts.
[00:03:45] One way to do this is by selectively utilizing the Socratic method.
[00:03:49] While sometimes our children just want an answer from us,
[00:03:52] there are other times when they benefit from answering a question with a question.
[00:03:57] When my six-year-old asks,
[00:03:58] why don't you let me use toy guns?
[00:04:00] I could launch into a complicated political discussion about my feelings on gun control,
[00:04:05] or I could ask him to speculate on why he thinks I have that rule.
[00:04:09] His speculation, in turn, helps me understand how complex his thinking is on the topic
[00:04:15] before I choose my own words.
[00:04:18] I challenge him to answer his own question,
[00:04:20] but also support him to figure it out as the conversation continues.
[00:04:25] Thus, I am also helping him learn that he has the right and responsibility
[00:04:29] to try to answer his own questions and formulate his own opinions.
[00:04:32] If he later wants to argue a different perspective,
[00:04:36] I can respectfully enter into that conversation even though I will sometimes have the last word.
[00:04:41] Expose your children to unexpected and new experiences.
[00:04:45] Bring your children into the world with you at whatever level is appropriate.
[00:04:49] I take my child with me to vote and talk to him about why I am choosing certain candidates
[00:04:54] without getting into confusing or even scary conversations about terrorism or healthcare debates.
[00:04:59] In order to help him learn how to process these experiences,
[00:05:03] I try to model critical thinking by walking him through some of my own decision-making
[00:05:08] without overcomplicating things or talking for so long that he gets distracted and stops listening.
[00:05:13] We can also expose our children to new experiences by going out of our way
[00:05:18] to ensure that they are engaged with diverse perspectives in our communities and our daily lives.
[00:05:24] Living in a predominantly white community means that my child is not often exposed to children or families of color.
[00:05:30] Thus, I spend time thinking about diversity as it is represented in other sources of input, like books or media.
[00:05:38] When my child has questions about people who are different from him,
[00:05:41] I do not aspire to the old colorblind perspective.
[00:05:43] If my child notices that there is a person of color or a person with a disability or a transgender person
[00:05:50] and is unsure how to talk about it, I try to help him explore his questions and choose respectful language.
[00:05:56] I do not say, shh, don't talk about it.
[00:05:59] Support the intellectual and emotional growth of your children in the critical thinking sense.
[00:06:04] Realize that engaging in critical thinking and the discussions that go along with it can be emotionally draining.
[00:06:10] While it is important to ask our children good questions and to challenge them to come up with their own answers,
[00:06:17] there are times when they are going to be too tired or overwhelmed to do so.
[00:06:21] We can observe our children and be sensitive to their emotions
[00:06:24] and sometimes simply help them to find a resolution that works for the time being.
[00:06:29] Likewise, when a topic arises that is intellectually complex but also emotionally challenging,
[00:06:35] we can help them to name the emotions that are coming up for them.
[00:06:38] Are you feeling confused, honey?
[00:06:40] It is okay if you want to take a break from this conversation and come back to it later.
[00:06:44] We can also model observation and acknowledgement of our feelings.
[00:06:48] Isn't it hard to understand this idea?
[00:06:50] I sometimes can't make up my own mind how I feel about it.
[00:06:53] That can be frustrating, but I know I don't have to make this decision right away, so that helps me.
[00:06:59] And lastly, we can help them develop the ability to understand others' emotions,
[00:07:04] a highly important component of critical thinking,
[00:07:07] by engaging with them in discussions about putting themselves in someone else's shoes.
[00:07:12] I know it seems like it doesn't cause much harm to pick an apple from someone else's tree,
[00:07:16] but how would you feel if you looked out our window and saw someone picking from our tree?
[00:07:21] As my children grow older, I hope to translate these lessons into more complex situations.
[00:07:27] I want to teach them things like the danger of a single story or
[00:07:31] the ways that politicians or media can twist statistics to serve their own purposes.
[00:07:36] I want dinner table conversations to equip them with the skills to engage in respectful dialogue with others,
[00:07:42] even when we disagree.
[00:07:43] When they go to college, if they so choose, I want them to be the students who are already equipped
[00:07:49] to make the most of their classroom and real-world learning.
[00:07:52] The ones who ask questions that even the professor can't answer
[00:07:56] and who come up with new ways of interpreting even the most accepted theoretical concepts.
[00:08:01] If we can succeed in raising these kinds of children,
[00:08:04] just think about the potential for innovation and leadership for generations to come.
[00:08:13] You just listened to the post titled,
[00:08:15] How to Raise Critical Thinkers in a World That Desperately Needs Them by Carrie Williams Howe with Gottman.com.
[00:08:23] Really, really wonderful work here from Carrie.
[00:08:25] I appreciated this read a lot.
[00:08:27] So often it's easy for parents to not only underestimate their children's cognitive abilities,
[00:08:33] but also to want to hide them from the bad in the world.
[00:08:36] It's very tempting to want to glaze over complicating conversations or topics with children,
[00:08:41] but a great skill parents can practice is the rhetorical skill that comes with encouraging kids to reflect on certain things using language in a way that they understand.
[00:08:51] Children aren't incapable of thinking about such things.
[00:08:54] They just need the information to be presented to them with structure and awareness.
[00:08:59] And this is one of the best gifts, the best gifts that a parent can give to make their children more aware of themselves,
[00:09:04] and of course, more aware of the world around them.
[00:09:07] And with that, I am going to go ahead and wrap up today's episode.
[00:09:11] Have a fun and fulfilling weekend, and I will see you right back here with more exciting content where your optimal life awaits.
[00:09:18] Let's do the best gifts.
[00:09:19] We'll see you next time in the next video.
[00:09:19] We'll be right back here.
[00:09:19] We'll see you next time in the next video.
[00:09:19] Thank you.