2399: Intentional Motherhood: Parenting With a Purpose by LaToya Granados with Simply Fiercely on Self-Healing & Self-Care

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[00:00:30] Now before we start, you might want to check out our other podcasts covering topics like personal development and minimalism, money, health, relationships, and more. So to optimize your life in other areas, just search for Optimal Living Daily in your podcast app. Now on to the show.

[00:00:48] This is Optimal Relationships Daily. Intentional Motherhood. Parenting with a Purpose by LaToya Granados with SimplyFiercely.com.

[00:00:59] The baby bump appears, and it's love at first sight. Sometimes. Everyone has a different story. My love for my daughter was, in fact, instant and has never wavered. But my feelings about motherhood definitely have. It's a little hard to talk about, honestly.

[00:01:14] But I'm going to keep it real with you, friends. There are moments where I have honestly thought to myself,

[00:01:20] what in the world did I freaking sign up for? But even on the hard days, I have known that more than anything,

[00:01:28] I want to give my child everything that matters to me. Essentially, I want our life to be built upon our core values.

[00:01:35] As a mother, I want to build her an environment, every day, where I take hold of as many opportunities as possible

[00:01:42] to give her a childhood that creates a healthy foundation for the rest of her life to be built upon.

[00:01:48] I want her childhood to be filled with wonder and exploration, and physical safety and emotional security.

[00:01:55] As a yoga instructor, I entered motherhood with an aim to be mindful, to be present,

[00:02:00] and to do motherhood on purpose, and with a purpose. I'm writing this today because I believe in the notion

[00:02:07] that motherhood can actually be amazing. I believe that doing life with your child can be the most fun

[00:02:13] and rewarding experience of your life. The Decision to Heal

[00:02:17] But backtrack a little. Some of you may know that I've been in a difficult season of life in the last six

[00:02:24] months. I have decided to address childhood trauma that I repressed for many years. I've been diagnosed

[00:02:30] with PTSD and have been in therapy to learn how to manage my life and recover from this trauma.

[00:02:36] I have been terrified to enjoy the life I have for fear that the other shoe will soon drop.

[00:02:41] I want to run from the pain and discomfort and never look back. I want to eat and shop my way out of the

[00:02:47] dark tunnel. But friends, let me tell you, I went into the tunnel on purpose, with a purpose. Months ago,

[00:02:56] I made a conscious choice to look backwards and do the work to heal in order to become the best mom I

[00:03:01] could be. I had no idea what I'd embark on. As a result, I get to tell you that the only way for me

[00:03:08] to be whole, to be aware, to experience perfect closeness with my daughter, is to do my work to heal.

[00:03:15] Choosing to be intentional

[00:03:17] In order to be intentional as a mama, I have to be aware enough to know I'm not parenting from my

[00:03:23] wounds. For example, some of us are really codependent with our kiddos, that's me, or easily

[00:03:29] frustrated or struggle with discipline, or take your pick. I lean towards parenting out of fear when I'm

[00:03:35] not aware and present. When I am unhealthy, I show my daughter unhealthy patterns. I am not perfect,

[00:03:41] nor am I aiming to be, and I will, for a variety of reasons, have to apologize to my daughter.

[00:03:47] But, the more intentional I am, the more I can sleep in peace, knowing I truly did my best to

[00:03:54] show up for her and myself. Let's not forget ourselves in all of this.

[00:03:59] An Abundant Life

[00:04:01] I am now seeing that I have been given this beautiful opportunity to be here and enjoy the

[00:04:06] amazing life I currently have. I have issues, don't get me wrong, but I get to shift my

[00:04:11] focus to the blessings. Doing healing work allows me to open my eyes and see things differently,

[00:04:17] more honestly. I can miss blessings when I get stuck in what I was or when I focus on what doesn't

[00:04:23] serve me. But I realize today that motherhood does not equal misery sprinkled with some magic along the

[00:04:30] way. It is the abundant life with all the ups and downs and glory that life can possibly offer.

[00:04:36] So if you want more out of your motherhood journey, if you want to

[00:04:39] offer your children the most wonderful childhood imaginable, join me. I am not talking about

[00:04:45] perfection. I am talking about healing, fun, joy, learning from mistakes, and moving forward.

[00:04:52] I am talking about freedom and wisdom with your values at the forefront. We are going to take back

[00:04:58] our lives and we are going to create an amazing childhood for our littles while finding our true

[00:05:03] identities in the midst of it all. How to parent with a purpose. Okay, the practicals for intentional

[00:05:11] motherhood. Number one, make space in your life for reflection. It's got to be part of your weekly

[00:05:18] rhythms. I try to do yoga three times a week and I go to therapy once a week. I also sit in journal

[00:05:24] at least once a week. Number two, establish your support system. For me, it's two friends who I can be

[00:05:31] totally transparent with. I often tell them ahead of time, I don't want advice. I just need someone

[00:05:37] to listen and validate my feelings. Also, my husband and my therapist. Number three, have a go-to

[00:05:44] affirmation. Either daily, sometimes weekly, or even monthly, I'll grab an affirmation for the hard

[00:05:51] moments. This month, it's, I am strong enough to face the pain. Number four, make self-care a priority.

[00:05:59] I know we all try to do this, but just start with one manageable thing every day. My goal this month

[00:06:05] is to wake up a little before my kiddo to exercise and have coffee. Number five, simplify your life by

[00:06:13] getting rid of whatever takes away time from you being the healthiest you possible. Having more stuff

[00:06:19] means cleaning more stuff, which means less time for you to take care of yourself. Overpacking your

[00:06:24] schedule means less time for what matters most to you. You just listened to the post titled,

[00:06:34] Intentional Motherhood, Parenting with a Purpose, by Latoya Granados, with SimplyFiercely.com.

[00:06:41] And another great post on behalf of Latoya highlighting the value of bringing a full

[00:06:46] version of oneself to motherhood. Whether it's filling your life with a diverse array of passions

[00:06:51] and pursuits, or filling your life with regular understanding and healing practices for

[00:06:55] your emotional health, it's not until mothers and fathers alike are willing to see parenting as just

[00:07:01] one part of their identities that they can be the best parents they can be. Throwing all other mental

[00:07:07] health practices by the wayside just to spend time with our children is not what's best for them,

[00:07:12] as we can unknowingly project our mental health struggles onto them. Follow Latoya's guidance and

[00:07:18] take care of these parts of yourself so that you can truly bring purpose to your interactions with

[00:07:23] your children. Both you and they will be thankful for it, I promise you. And I'll leave you to it now as

[00:07:28] we wrap up another episode of ORD. Thank you so much for tuning in as always. We could not do this

[00:07:33] without you. Enjoy your Saturday and be sure to come back tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.