2528: Perfectly Imperfect by Shana Olmstead on Self-Compassion and Acceptance

[00:00:00] Hello everybody and welcome back to another bonus episode of ORD with me, your host, Greg Audino. Now this time I'll be sharing a previously aired episode of Optimal Living Daily, our parent show, a show that's all about personal development. So enjoy everyone, here is Justin, as we optimize your life. Perfectly Imperfect by Shana Olmstead of ShanaOlmstead.com

[00:00:27] I recently had a moment of misalignment with my higher self. I was going on vacation and parking at my best friend's house who lives close to the airport for convenience. The day of our trip, I was sick, which makes me very cranky. It was early. I had not slept well, partly because of being sick. We had time pressure to make it to the airport on time. It was pouring down rain, which just makes all of it more annoying. And I was having issues with the Uber app for some reason.

[00:00:55] I was only just a little tiny bit cranky with my kids and my friend as we got to her house and were transitioning into the Uber. We were going to Maui to have an amazing time, and I was still caught up in a moment of crankiness. I'd done all the things to feel better. I meditated in the morning. I listened to things that made me feel good in the car on the way there. I visualized everything going well. I asked for help from the universe to feel good and at peace.

[00:01:22] And still, I was a little cranky for five minutes between getting to my friend's house and getting all of our stuff into an Uber to get to the airport. That wasn't the worst part, though. When I'm not feeling well, my brain, like everyone else's, has a hard time staying positive. I'm also very sensitive in all ways, so I can really feel it very intensely when something is off in my body and mind.

[00:01:46] This made it harder for me to let go of the really very tiny and short and mild cranky moment I had. I was judging myself and questioning why I wasn't able to be more mindful in that moment. I was conscious of this train of thought and doing my best to shift it, but still, it was there behind the scenes saying, Why were you so irritable? And you are better than that.

[00:02:11] I have a view of myself as spiritual and calm and loving and always mindful. While I know rationally that I'm also a human being working through stuff like we all are, I have a hard time letting go of times when I don't feel I am being my best self. I've made it through so many hard things in my life, and I know that overall I'm a lovely person. All of this is true, and at the same time, I am flawed and a perfectly imperfect human just like all of us.

[00:02:41] I'm working on embracing and loving all of the parts of myself, even the parts that aren't perfect and magical and sparkly and zen all the time. Everything is here to help me grow, and this moment helps me to know that I want to continue working all the time on mindfulness and non-reactivity. I want to remember in every moment that I am doing the best I can. The judgment I had of myself in that moment was the thing that made it hard to let go of.

[00:03:11] As I grow in my self-love, I accept that, yes, I do have irritable moments now and then, and guess what? That's okay. Everyone, including therapists, spiritual teachers, and self-help gurus, are also humans that are working on themselves. If I can just let these moments pass through me, they move through quickly. The judgment is just like adding fuel to a fire, expanding and making it big, when it doesn't need to be any bigger than a little passing spark.

[00:03:41] The sooner I can let go of criticizing myself for not being perfect, the more quickly I can come back into alignment with my true self. Some practices that helped me to let go of the judgment, it didn't take long, this whole thing happened in maybe 30 minutes or less, were this. Number one, coming back to my body. As soon as I was able in the Uber on the way to the airport, I connected back to my body by slowing down my breath using the peace that begins with meditation.

[00:04:10] I took a slow, deep breath using the fingers on my right hand and touching them to my thumb for each word. Peace, inhale, exhale. Begins, inhale, exhale. With, inhale, exhale. Me, inhale, exhale. I repeated this for 2-3 minutes until I felt my body relax. Number two, bringing in the love. I then continued the slow, deep breaths while placing my hand on my heart

[00:04:37] and feeling love and appreciation for myself from the universe. I visualized white sparkly light coming down from the heavens and surrounding me with beautiful, loving energy. I did this for maybe 1-2 minutes and felt my energetic vibration increase. Number three, I reminded myself of the truth. Our brains don't understand the truth if we're still feeling triggered in the fight or flight response. So it's very important to calm yourself down

[00:05:06] before you try to shift your thoughts. Once my body was feeling great, I introduced more truthful thoughts again, like you're doing the best you can. There are no mistakes. And everything is happening in divine order. And you are a being of light surrounded by the loving energy of the universe. And number four, I remembered to laugh at myself. I usually am great at laughing at things like this. None of this is serious.

[00:05:35] What a cute little silly human person I am thinking this is a big deal. I recently sucked my hair into the vacuum cleaner attachment, the horror. And after I screamed and turned it off, I just couldn't stop laughing about it as I untangled my hair from the machine. When I can remember to lighten up, I can feel into the light of remembering that all there is is love and light and energy and that there is no reason to worry about anything ever.

[00:06:04] I hope any of this is helpful for you. You are a lovely human learning and growing. There are no mistakes. It is all helping you to evolve. The more quickly you can let go of your self-judgment when you have an unaligned moment, the sooner you can get back to feeling good. You just listened to the post titled Perfectly Imperfect by Shana Olmsted of shanaolmsted.com.

[00:06:32] I think it is Shana, a nice reminder in there. She said, everyone, including therapists, spiritual teachers, and self-help gurus are also humans that are working on themselves. Sometimes it's easy to look into someone else's life, especially someone with a large online presence who is in this space of personal development or coaching or spirituality, gurus as she called them. And it looks like their life is perfect as we peer in through the window.

[00:07:01] It's nice and neat, no clutter, either literal or metaphorical. All of their pictures on Instagram are super happy and seem to be happening daily. Maybe you even get that impression from me because usually when I'm recording, I'm in a good headspace. But it's all curated. Those pictures that are posted aren't necessarily from that same day, even if they release one, one a day. Even me recording this. Not to spoil the fun, but I didn't actually record this the day you're hearing it. It was sometime before,

[00:07:31] and that allows me to have days in between that aren't the best or where I don't feel well, which as Shana said, is totally okay. And I'd argue, actually important to have. We need those down days to appreciate and understand the ups. Now, how we react in those cases, how we treat others during those times, that's very important. Because if we disrespect those that we care about just because we're having an off day, well, that's going to give them a bad day as well, and then the cycle continues.

[00:08:01] That's a little bit off topic from the article, but just something I wanted to mention. Even when we're not in the best place, it's really important to consider everyone else. And with that, have a great rest of your day, and I'll be back tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.