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Episode 3103:
Krista O'Reilly-Davi-Digui shares the kind of person she wants to be: someone who listens well, shows up in hard times, and holds hope for others. Her reflections are relationship advice in its purest form, a blueprint for building healthy relationships rooted in compassion and authenticity.
Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.alifeinprogress.ca/the-kind-of-person-i-want-to-be/
Quotes to ponder:
"I want to be the kind of person who listens well. I want to listen far more than I speak."
"I'll be quick to forgive and slow to take offense."
"When you have no hope I will bear hope for you. When you have no light, I will share the tiny bit I have."
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[00:00:00] Hey, it's Justin from Optimal Living Daily. Before we start, I want to share a super powerful practice I use called NSDR or Non-Sleep Deep Rest. In just about 10 minutes or so, this Yoga Nidra practice leaves you feeling as refreshed as after a nap without actually sleeping. Experience it for yourself on our guided podcast. Search NSDR and look for the one from Optimal Living Daily.
[00:00:26] This is Optimal Relationships Daily, The Kind of Person I Want to Be by Krista OReilly-Davi-Digui of A Life In Progress I want to be the kind of person who listens well. I want to listen far more than I speak. And when I don't know what to say, I want to shut up and be the kind of person who offers a hug and a homemade meal.
[00:00:49] I want to be the kind of person who shows up at the emergency room when called. I don't need all the details, I won't make assumptions or make up stories. And I will hold your private details for you if that's what you need. Or I'll rally the troops on your behalf.
[00:01:05] I won't tell you just to pray more or cover you with shame when you have the courage to tell the truth or ask for help. I won't suggest your loved one is in a better place now, because I understand that you are left behind, hurting, and that matters.
[00:01:19] I will offer compassion and tears, because I've been in dark places myself. I've walked through seasons of depression, pain, and grief. And though I may not fully understand what you're walking through, I have needed others to just love me through the valley. I want to be the kind of person who doesn't assume your child did something wrong when I see their face on a missing poster. And I want to be a person who lets you talk as much as you need to about the person you loved who you helped bury.
[00:01:50] I will do my best to see to you as a messy person, like myself. Gifted. Worthy of love. Imperfect. And beautiful. I'll be quick to forgive and slow to take offense. I'll try to remember that I have much to learn, and stay open to hearing from your perspective. I'll be real about my struggles, so you know you can be real too. I want you to know that when you're afraid, you're not alone.
[00:02:17] That when your marriage is imploding, or you're struggling with addiction, or your child is in pain, or everything feels like it's breaking at once, and you're not sure you have what it takes to hold on, I will hold you up. I won't pretend I have the answers, or that I have any idea how to fix it. I won't offer you unsolicited advice, but I will help hold you up. When you need a safe place to talk, I will do my best to hear you.
[00:02:43] I will practice holding space for your anger and rage, for your grief and fear and longing, for all your brokenness. And though I may not say this aloud, I will believe for you that light will come again. When you have no hope, I will bear hope for you. When you have no light, I will share the tiny bit I have. I will use up my breath and energy, my time and my talents, to call out the beauty and strength I see in you.
[00:03:13] I will laugh alongside you at all our imperfections, the ways we bumble our way along, and we can tell the truth about the ways we want to grow, and how we're learning to love who we are. I will speak up if you or other people talk meanly about you. I will have your back. I want to be the kind of person who helps build a world that's safe to live in. I will lift up, rather than tearing down.
[00:03:39] When people offer hate and meanness, I'll try to remember that I always get to choose my response. I know I'll make mistakes, but I'll pick myself up and keep a light on for your child who doesn't feel safe in this world. For your friend who wonders if she is worthy of taking up space. And for you who are weary and heavy-hearted. I will be the kind of person who believes in dialogue, and that when we lay down our weapons and come together,
[00:04:06] we build a stronger, safer, and healthier community. I will examine my beliefs and the thoughts that I have, and alter course when I realize now I know better. I will hold fast in some areas, but even then do my best to remember I only see in part. In a world that can feel scary and harsh, I want to be the kind of person who keeps believing in better. Who doesn't give up, and who keeps on fighting.
[00:04:34] Who isn't too busy to lift up others. I often feel weak or afraid, and like I have little to offer. But I want to be the kind of person who shows up anyway. You just listened to the post titled, The Kind of Person I Want to Be, by Krista O'Reilly-Davi-Digui of alifeinprogress.ca Hey, it's Justin from Optimal Living Daily.
[00:05:01] Before we start, I want to share a super powerful practice I use called NSDR, or Non-Sleep Deep Rest. In just about 10 minutes or so, this Yoga Nidra practice leaves you feeling as refreshed as after a nap. Without actually sleeping. Experience it for yourself on our guided podcast. Search NSDR, and look for the one from Optimal Living Daily. And thanks a lot to Krista for this post.
[00:05:28] And even just for taking the time to reflect on her relationship goals. You know, many of us have a hard time even considering them, let alone articulating them on a public forum as she has. And this kind of work is really grounding, and I think speaks to the music of relationships, you know? You know, the beauty they have that's more attached to feeling than it is words and description. And while I'm sure you've taken a lot of inspiration from this post, or at least I hope you have,
[00:05:54] I encourage you to take note of one thing that all of her pledges today share. The lack of conditionality. Krista is solely focused on putting good into the world and treating others lovingly, regardless of what people are giving to her. This is a really active choice that stemmed in something as close to true love as one can imagine. And it's a real act of humaneness to approach relationships and the roles we play in relationships like this.
[00:06:22] Though it's important to consider how we're being treated and how to not turn into martyrs, what she's laid out here for us today is an absolutely wonderful example to follow. But that's going to do it for today, everyone. Thank you, as always, for tuning in and doing something good for your relationships. I appreciate you, and we couldn't do this without you. So have a great rest of your day, and be sure to tune back in tomorrow for more, where your optimal life awaits. Thank you, and we'll see you next time.