1690: [Part 1] The Real Reason Self-Promotion Sucks by Margo Aaron of That Seems Important

[00:00:00] This is Optimal Work Daily. The Real Reason Self-Promotion Sucks, Part 1 by Margo Aaron of ThatSeemsImportant.com No one likes promoting themselves. It's awkward, it's uncomfortable, and it makes us all feel like we're bragging and annoying people. When you start to feel like, I'm not a salesperson, I'm the subject matter expert, I shouldn't have to do this, I'm above this, one of four things happens.

[00:00:26] 1. You start to explore your paid ad options because the thought of organically growing something makes you want to throw up. 2. You convince yourself affiliates are the way to go because it's efficient and gets you in front of other already existing audiences. 3. You seek out a social media expert who will do social for you. 4. You do nothing because you're waiting to get all your ducks in a row before you promote anything.

[00:00:51] The trouble with each of these approaches is that they don't solve the real problem. The real problem is that you hate self-promotion and you don't want to do it. And when we don't want to do something, we'll do anything to avoid it, including making bad business decisions, because we're being motivated by fear instead of being objective about what's best for our business and our customers. So I'm going to explain why these approaches are no bueno for this stage of the game, and then give you a better way. Why you don't want to start with paid ads.

[00:01:21] A general rule of thumb for paid ads is that your cost per acquisition, or CPA, needs to be less than your customer lifetime value, CLV. Which makes sense because if it costs you more to get a customer than the customer is worth, your business loses money, which defeats the purpose of your ad in the first place. A lot of people think, eh, I'll throw $100, $500, $1,000 at Facebook and go from there.

[00:01:45] But until you have consistent sales, you have no idea what your customer's lifetime value, or CLV, is. You're just guessing whether this strategy is positively impacting growth. Worse, you risk hyper-focusing on the wrong numbers, like impressions, or how many people saw your ad, instead of sales, how many people bought from you. To add insult to injury, there is sophisticated art and science to writing ads. If you are averse to selling in the first place, then you're going to suck at writing a strong,

[00:02:15] or even good, lead-generating ad the first few times around. Did I lead with the right benefit? Did I have a strong enough call to action? Was the design clean enough? Was it clear what my ad was trying to say? Should I send people to a landing page or to a sales page? Do I make them opt in first? Unless you're a huge weirdo like me who loves this stuff, you probably have a headache from listening to that paragraph. Running ads when you're just starting out is like doing a five-day cleanse when you're trying to lose 60 pounds.

[00:02:43] You'll lose a few pounds, but it won't fix the real problem. The Problem with Affiliates The logic I hear for this approach is solid. Get in front of already captive audiences. That's smart, but there are better ways to do this out of the gate than affiliate selling. The most effective way to sell is to develop a relationship with the audience before you start selling them something, which takes a long, long time. The reasons have to do with market norms versus social norms.

[00:03:11] Market norms are the unofficial laws governing behavior in a transaction involving money. Relationships governed by market norms are formal and strict. I will do X for you for X dollars. The end. This is how traditional businesses functioned in an industrial economy. Makes sense. In a connection economy, however, you want to lead with social norms, especially if you're trying to build a following. Let's say you went to a friend's place for dinner and realized you forgot to bring wine.

[00:03:38] So you hand them $30 cash when they open the door instead of wine. They're financially equivalent, technically, but how would your friend react? It would be weird. So weird. Same thing with your audience. You want to hand them wine. If you go the affiliate route and don't yet have a list, I'd recommend not selling anything at first. Provide value for free, like a PDF or lead magnet specifically for that audience. Get them on your list before you start selling to them.

[00:04:05] The affiliate approach is appealing because you can piggyback off someone else's existing relationship with their audience without having to do the work. But, most people are lying about how engaged their audience is. So, while you may be getting in front of them, you don't actually know if that person has the loyal, interested audience they promised. If you're starting out, you want to have a relationship with your audience first. That's where you want to spend the bulk of your time. Why you don't need to do social.

[00:04:33] Posting things randomly on social media is not doing social. I'm not sure what doing social is, but I suspect what people mean is that they want someone to post on social media platforms for them. The problem with this is that it assumes that your audience is sitting around ready and willing to buy, click, or comment on your posts. There's nothing wrong with hiring an expert and going out of house for your social media. If you're paying for social strategy because you don't have the bandwidth and your prospects are on Facebook, all good.

[00:05:03] If you're paying for someone to post broadcast messages because you think you're supposed to be on Facebook, then, Houston, we have a problem. Before you pay for an expert, you have to understand how social works and why you're on it in the first place. What is the business reason you're on Facebook? What about Twitter, Snapchat? How is it helping you to meet your goals? You're thinking, Margot, obviously it helps me to get the word out. And you're wrong. No one is sitting at home flipping through their feed waiting to hear about your promotion.

[00:05:32] People want to watch their besties engagement video or see pictures from a party last week or OMG a puppy in a sweater. We engage with content that's relevant, valuable, and interesting to us. You're on Facebook, you know this. You want to interact with your friends. There are no secrets about Facebook's function now that you have a business. The laws governing social media remain the same. It's social. The reason you feel unqualified to do it now is because you feel self-promotey. And rightfully so. It's uncomfortable.

[00:06:01] You have to post in front of friends, family, and people who might not be your target market. And it's terrifying because they're all judging you, or at least it feels that way. What's worse is that you're posting into the ether, being totally ignored, getting zero engagement, and feeling like poop about your efforts. It feels futile in the beginning because no one is paying attention, and that sucks. It's also really hard. Even if the rules remain the same, you're not the same. You're thinking like a business and start to speak in a different voice.

[00:06:30] Whenever we stop thinking like a person and start thinking like an entity, we talk like a used car salesman in what I call the overly chipper effect. It turns people off. Customers and prospects are people. It helps when you talk to them like people. That doesn't mean that you shouldn't create a social media strategy or editorial calendar, or eventually hire someone to help you manage social. But in the beginning, there is no substitute for you developing a relationship with your audience, and facing the awkwardness. To be continued.

[00:07:03] You just listened to part one of the post titled, The Real Reason Self-Promotion Sucks by Margot Aaron of ThatSeemsImportant.com. And thanks to Margot, our author today, in her quest to answer the question, how do you get people to care, and not finding the answers in her job, Margot set about learning all she could about persuasion, influence, direct response, copywriting, branding, and more, and eventually started her own business.

[00:07:30] But while she was making money, she still wasn't getting people to care. So she started writing about her experiences, and eventually gained quite a following. Today, Margot is the co-host of the popular internet talk show, Hillary and Margot Yell at Websites. And her website, That Seems Important, was named one of the top 100 websites for writers. So come on and check it out. You can find it at ThatSeemsImportant.com, and I have that linked in this episode's description. And that's going to do it for today's installment.

[00:07:58] Hope you have a great weekend, and I will see you back here on Sunday, where we're going to finish up this post, and where your optimal life awaits. the car have a very little priority, let's go ahead and see it. We're gonna see things very easily. And at this time, it's possible that we can see