3447: [Part 1] How I Finally Cut Back on Drinking (+ Tips To Get You There, Too) by Kylee of A Blue Sky Mind on Alcohol Reduction
Optimal Health DailyJune 28, 2026
3447
00:13:13

3447: [Part 1] How I Finally Cut Back on Drinking (+ Tips To Get You There, Too) by Kylee of A Blue Sky Mind on Alcohol Reduction

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Episode 3447:

Kylee shares the intentional mindset shifts, tracking strategies, and belief-changing tools that helped her dramatically reduce her alcohol consumption after years of normalizing unhealthy drinking habits. By examining personal assumptions about alcohol, benchmarking drinking patterns, and surrounding herself with supportive people, she offers a practical framework for anyone looking to build a healthier relationship with drinking.

Read along with the original article(s) here: https://www.ablueskymind.com/blog/how-to-cut-back-on-drinking-tips

Quotes to ponder:

"Regretting how much you drank or your decisions around drinking might be “normal” in some social circles, but it is never “healthy.”"

"One of my big breakthroughs is that I associate drinking with a “fun” and “rich” life, one that makes me happy, interesting, and likable."

"Building awareness is a powerful tool for behavior change, and using a "drink counter" app or practice is a great place to start when it comes to drinking."

Episode references:

Quit Like a Woman: https://www.amazon.com/Quit-Like-Woman-Radical-Obsession/dp/1984825054

Reframe: https://www.joinreframeapp.com/

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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[00:00:59] Part 1 by Kylie of A Blue Sky Mind. And I'm Dr. Neal Malik. Welcome back to Optimal Health Daily, where I simply read to you from the best health and fitness websites for free. This is kind of like an audiobook, but with articles instead, and articles from a bunch of different authors. And of course, with permission from the sites. Now on Fridays, I answer your questions.

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[00:01:51] Now before we get to it, today's episode is a little longer than normal. So whenever that happens, I'll read the first half today and then finish up the rest for you tomorrow. So with that, let's hear part one as we optimize your life. How I finally cut back on drinking. Plus, tips to get you there too. Part one, by Kylie of ablueskymind.com

[00:02:19] If I can cut back, anyone can't. The path to a semi-abusive relationship with alcohol is long and meandering. Most people won't find the journey comparable on the way back. To cut back, I've had to be very intentional about redirecting this relationship. I spent a lot of time thinking about and working on this area, so I'm excited to share the advice, frameworks, and tools I've picked up along the way. My tips to cut back on or stop drinking.

[00:02:48] If and when you're ready, here's what helped me. 1. Figure out if you have a quote-unquote problem. 2022 was the first year since maybe 2008 that I did not once drink too much or drink to a point that I regretted the amount the next day. No blackouts, no nasty hangovers, no shame monster. It might not seem like much from the outside, but for me, it was the first time in 14 years of problematic drinking.

[00:03:18] And most of those years, I would have considered myself exceedingly normal. After a particularly big night out, I would laugh with my friends about the idiotic things I or we had done and become a puddle of shame and anxiety in bed at night, fully believing this was just what young adulthood was about. If you're wondering whether your habits could be considered problematic, try asking yourself the following questions.

[00:03:43] In the past year, have you had times when you ended up drinking more or longer than you intended? Have you more than once wanted to cut down or stop drinking or tried to but couldn't? Have you spent a lot of time drinking or being sick or getting over the after effects? Or have you wanted to drink so badly you couldn't think of anything else? The too-long-didn't-listen version. Regretting how much you drank or your decisions around drinking

[00:04:13] might be normal in some social circles, but it is never healthy. If this is more than an occasional occurrence for you, it may signal that there's work to be done on your relationship with alcohol. 2. Quantify and benchmark your drinking habits Building awareness is a powerful tool for behavior change, and using a drink counter app or practice is a great place to start when it comes to drinking.

[00:04:38] The Reframe app, for example, offers a neuroscience-based approach to reducing drinking and improving mental health, much like the weight loss app Noom, if you've ever heard of it. When I signed up for the app last January, I was asked to set a goal for my weekly number of drinks. I had no idea what a healthy or acceptable goal would be, having mostly grown up hearing about the risks of binge drinking versus learning what healthy moderation looked like. I decided I'd start by becoming average.

[00:05:06] If I'm being honest, I just wanted to know how many drinks I could get away with, according to science. I asked Google and was blown away. According to a 2021 Gallup article, American adults have, on average, just 3.6 drinks per week. This includes the 34% who say they had no drinks in the past week, 52% who said they had between 1 and 7, and 13% who say they had 8 or more.

[00:05:34] Considering a normal week for me includes a few social drinks on the weekdays and then a compulsory 1 to 3 on each weekend night, I'm easily part of the top 13% of drinkers. Here's something that might explain why, or my peer group, think that drinking is so normal. According to a 2021 article by Gallup, you're more likely to drink if you're a man, between the ages of 35 and 54, a college graduate, and don't identify as religious.

[00:06:03] Binge drinking in the U.S. is also most prevalent in white populations, Midwesterners, and households making over $75,000 per year. Putting all my risk factors together, I have four of the seven, which likely explains why I'm exposed to more drinking than the average American. But, instead of assuming that's just the way things are, I can be intentional about which segment of the population I'd like to fall into. There's choice in these data.

[00:06:32] The too-long-didn't-listen version. It's common to both abstain from alcohol and drink very moderately. The majority of American adults have about 4 drinks per week. It's considered excessive drinking when you have more than 1-2 drinks in a day, and binge drinking every time you have more than 4-5 within a 2-hour period. 3. Investigate your beliefs about drinking Another tool that helped me cut back on drinking

[00:06:59] was a book I was assigned as part of my inner MBA coursework called Immunity to Change. The book centers on an admittedly strange premise that the body has a psychological immune system that intentionally resists change in one's life because the way you've always done things has kept you alive to date. The book leads you through a process developed by social scientists to help you name and debunk the hidden commitments, fears, and assumptions that are working against your goals,

[00:07:29] whether it be a change you want to make at work, to your waistline, or in the world. One of my big breakthroughs is that I associate drinking with a fun and rich life, one that makes me happy, interesting, and likable. Identifying certain beliefs about why I drink in my Immunity to Change map helped me change the way I think and therefore change the way I behave. Second, the aforementioned Reframe app was invaluable for reshaping my beliefs

[00:07:59] about alcohol. Each day, you complete a handful of short lessons, check-ins, and activities that bring mindfulness and education to your consumption habits. The lessons cover everything from the severe health impacts of alcohol to the media's role in driving drinking habits globally. It's easy to think that you've heard this all before, but trust me, learning about how alcohol is accelerating your skin's aging process and effing up your sleep hits differently when you're not a bright-eyed,

[00:08:28] bushy-tailed teen anymore. Finally, while I certainly never believed that my drinking habits were good for my health, it has been well worth my time to reacquaint myself with just how utterly terrible alcohol is for your productivity, mental health, and physical well-being. The Reframe app has a number of lessons on this topic. Books like Holly Whitaker's Quit Like a Woman and a particular podcast from professor and neuroscientist Dr. Andrew Huberman, What Alcohol Does to Your Body, Brain, and Health,

[00:08:58] shook me to my core. The Too Long Didn't Listen version. Revisit the facts of just how bad alcohol is for the body, brain, and society. Consider doing some deep excavation of your beliefs around alcohol, either with the immunity-to-change map, a therapist, or a trained coach. Four. Cultivate a community of moderates or non-drinkers. There's that trite but true saying, you're the combination of the five people

[00:09:27] you spend the most time with. If the five people around you are heavy drinkers, you're going to have to either bring them along on your journey or consider surrounding yourself with different people. Friends, with how important your community is to your thoughts and behaviors, you can and should choose and re-choose it over your lifetime. There's a lot of deeply biological-packed psychology we have to override when we actively choose to do something our people aren't already doing.

[00:09:56] It takes a lot of courage. The best advice I can offer you is to identify your most authentic self and put them out there. Seek out spaces that align with your values and consciously curate a community of people who have similar goals and worldviews. I've made huge strides in my relationship with alcohol by prioritizing time with friends who also want to reduce their consumption, try alternative lifestyles or hobbies, and allow me to connect deeply without alcohol.

[00:10:26] To be continued. You just listened to part one of the post titled How I Finally Cut Back on Drinking Plus Tips to Get You There Too by Kylie of AblueskyMind.com And I'll be right back with my commentary. This episode is brought to you by Google Health. Stop chasing someone else's definition of health. What matters is what's healthy for you. Google Health offers a new kind of coach built with Gemini

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[00:12:23] about how excessive drinking is defined. Kylie said that more than one to two drinks a day is considered excessive. We can actually get a bit more specific here. For women, one drink per day is considered drinking in moderation. An example of this would be one 12 ounce beer or another example of one drink would be five to six ounces of wine. If we're talking about hard liquor like whiskey or gin, one and a half ounces or about a shot

[00:12:53] of hard liquor would be considered one drink. For men, two drinks per day is considered drinking in moderation. moderation. So, men can have two 12 ounce beers in one day or five to six ounces of wine and one 12 ounce beer or one shot of hard liquor and one 12 ounce beer. You get the idea. So, why is drinking in moderation different for men and women? Well, I'll save that little detail

[00:13:22] for my commentary on tomorrow's episode. So, for now, that'll do it for today. Thank you so much for being a follower or subscriber to the show. I hope you have a great rest of your day and, of course, I'll see you back here tomorrow where we'll finish up this post and where your optimal life awaits.