3036: 9 Helpful Hints For Making Good Decisions by Rachel Shanken of MindBodyWise on How to Be More Decisive

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[00:00:58] Do you struggle with the process of making decisions? Whether it's a life-altering decision or a smaller choice, we've all been faced with this challenge at some point in our lives. In anecdote, I was recently faced with deciding between three fantastic opportunities.

[00:01:14] They all happened to fall on the same weekend. Although I recognize that this was, in the scheme of life, not anywhere close to the most important choice I'd have to make, it still challenged my decision-making skills.

[00:01:25] It still pulled me in different directions, and with this, I loved the lessons that I learned. When I realized that I would have to choose between these three options, I heard my mind say, oh no, I wish this wasn't happening.

[00:01:37] I had a feeling of overwhelm that churned in my gut. Next, I noticed resistance that felt like a surge of nervous energy running through my legs and there was noticeable tension in my stomach. The resistance had a lot to say.

[00:01:49] Why do they all have to be happening at the same time? No matter which I pick, I'll miss out on the others. It's impossible to measure which one is best for me right now.

[00:01:57] I felt the reverberation of internal chaos as thoughts, feelings and sensations were on high blast. I called two wise friends and my business coach to get guidance. They were helpful at shedding some light on the practical and the emotional angles of the dilemma,

[00:02:11] but still I felt rumblings of indecision. I wanted to listen to my body, but my body was so overwhelmed. It was just as flooded and chaotic as my mind. When I became aware of this flooding sensation, I knew to go to my tools, deep breaths, yoga and meditation.

[00:02:28] These body-mind self-care practices helped me clear the chaos of my mind and my body. That space helped me to realize that I had a little bit of time, not much, before making a final decision and that the pressure I was putting on this was my own.

[00:02:43] I paused, I sat with and moved with my fear of missing out and my fear of making the wrong decision, the pressure I created inside myself, the battling voices of my mind, the sensations that arose each time I thought about it

[00:02:57] and the frustration of making a big deal about fun opportunities. I witnessed myself in ways that felt uncomfortable. I breathed. After learning more details about each of the three events and sitting with and moving with all the stuff that showed up inside me,

[00:03:12] I had several realizations, reminders and ah-has that I hope you too will find helpful in making sound decisions. Although my example was a quote-unquote first world decision, I believe these realizations hold true in most decision-making processes. Number one, no wrong decisions.

[00:03:30] What if there were no wrong decisions and only life lessons? Unless it's life or death and even then sometimes, a decision simply leads you down a different road, not a right road or a wrong road, just different.

[00:03:43] I realized that whichever I chose, I'll learn from my decision-making process. That's a win all around. For me, this took the pressure off and allowed me to explore the exciting things about all of my great options. Number two, gather all the information.

[00:03:58] I was already launching into decision-making mode without knowing all the details of each event. I was weighing options that didn't yet officially exist. Then I was allowing the made-up information to impact my mind and my body.

[00:04:10] After gathering all the actual information and having conversations with the organizers of each event, the decision moved from murky to clear, leading me to feel much less conflicted. Number three, privilege of choice.

[00:04:24] In the midst of my self-induced overwhelm and fear, I had this moment where a thought popped into my head. How fortunate am I that I get to choose between three wonderful options that I live in a place where choice is taken for granted

[00:04:36] and decisions like these feel like burdens instead of privileges. I began to breathe easier. Number four, gratitude. After realizing my privilege to choose, I had a wave of gratitude wash over me. I am grateful for having so many choices every day

[00:04:52] for having a body and a mind and a life that provides me with options. We are so fortunate and choice is the key to freedom. Number five, saying no to say yes. I love it when I am reminded that anytime I say no to something,

[00:05:07] I am saying yes to a bunch of open doors. Saying no isn't nearly as difficult when I can see how many yeses await me. Number six, pausing to go. By pausing giving myself a little bit of time and space

[00:05:22] and using the tools that I know work for me, it gave me just what I needed to make a decision that felt aligned with who I am. It's tempting when in the discomfort of uncertainty to want it resolved now.

[00:05:33] But taking that extra bit of time, even a simple breath or two, can make all the difference. Rushing forward with decisions is rarely necessary. Number seven, self-induced pressure. I made my decision making process much more complicated and unnecessarily stressful by putting an artificial time limit on it.

[00:05:51] Notice where you are adding unnecessary pressures or unimportant factors to your process and let them go. Number eight, it's an inside job. No matter how wise, others can't make your decisions for you. They can shed light, help give perspective, point out things you missed,

[00:06:08] and be a nice support during your process. But in the end, it's up to you. And how fortunate is that? See number four. And number nine, good decisions don't always feel good. It doesn't mean it's a wrong decision if you don't feel a sigh of relief

[00:06:22] when you've made your final decision. Sometimes choices are tough and they create change in your life. Change is scary even when it's for the good. Hang in and breathe through it and trust that once you've made your choice,

[00:06:34] the new road you're traveling on is just where you need to be. You just listened to the post titled Nine Helpful Hints for Making Good Decisions by Rachel Shankin of MindBodyWise.com and I'll be right back with my commentary. Thank you Rachel.

[00:06:53] Those physical manifestations of stress that she talked about are real. I'm sure we've all experienced them on some level and some more than others. But it can really affect our health. I think that's why my brother regularly talks about stress management over on optimal health daily

[00:07:10] and something we really have to take care of. Our bodies tend to mirror what's going on in our heads. It's crazy how it works, but study after study shows the importance of taking care of our minds so that our minds really can take care of our bodies.

[00:07:26] I also like that she talked about getting guidance. She said that some people shed some light on the dilemma for her, but she still felt rumblings of indecision. And I think those perspectives are important from other people, even if they don't give you the answer.

[00:07:42] You never know what someone else will bring up when they hear it from a completely different angle outside of our heads. And like she said, even if it's the quote unquote wrong decision, it's really not. It's just a learning experience.

[00:07:58] Seeing each different decision as a path to a different experience might help get rid of that sense of pressure we have to make the perfect decision. And then hopefully we can have a better perspective with gratitude instead of stress and judgment.

[00:08:15] So hopefully this can help you with your decisions today. With that, have a great rest of your day. Thank you for being here and I'll see you tomorrow. Where your optimal life awaits.