3104: [Part 2] How to Get Good at Dealing With Massive Change by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits on Adaptability

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[00:01:03] This is Optimal Living Daily, episode 3104, How to Get Good at Dealing with Massive Change, Part 2 by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits dot net, and I'm Justin Malik. Happy Saturday, welcome back, or welcome for the first time if you're new here.

[00:01:19] This is where I read to you like a big ongoing audiobook, but from many different authors. And today being a continuation from yesterday, so I'd recommend listening to yesterday's episode first. But if you're all caught up, let's get right to part 2 and continue optimizing your life.

[00:01:38] How to Get Good at Dealing with Massive Change, Part 2 by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits dot net. How we can shift how we respond to change and stress continued. Number four, relax into the beauty of the changing moment.

[00:01:56] From this wide open place, we can relax our resistant mind and just relax into the ever changing moment. Notice the beauty of this change. Everything is moving, changing, shifting into a new moment. Nothing stays the same and nothing is really solid.

[00:02:14] It's flux, it's flow, it's the swirling ocean current of the universe. This is incredibly beautiful if we can relax and enjoy it. Number five, practice compassion, gratitude, and joyful appreciation. From this relaxed place, we can start to practice three things.

[00:02:35] First, see if you can find compassion for yourself and others for the suffering and struggle you're going through. Send out a loving wish to all beings that they find peace. Second, practice gratitude. Can you be grateful for this moment? Can you be grateful for the change?

[00:02:53] For me, even with a jolting change like the death of my father or one of my best friends along with the pain of loss, I could also feel gratitude that I had them in my life, which was an incredible gift.

[00:03:07] This doesn't mean you have to ignore the pain and stress. It just means noticing that both pain and gratitude can coexist in the same moment. Third, can you appreciate this moment for what it is? Can you appreciate its beauty, its swirling change, its wide openness, its heartbreaking gorgeousness?

[00:03:29] I often find joy in this appreciation for the universe as it is. And number six, practice loving things exactly as they are. Along those lines, take a moment to love the ever-changing moment exactly as it is.

[00:03:45] It includes suffering, wounded beings lashing out at others, loss and pain, but also constant shifting, constant growth and degradation, constant moving into something new. You are one with the wholeness of the universe, co-creating it with all other beings and matter

[00:04:04] and energy, and it's something to be loved fiercely. This is the process I suggest you try. What happens here is that we open up to change instead of resisting it. We learn to love things as they are, including the change, rather than complaining about them.

[00:04:23] We learn to find appreciation and joy in the change, rather than wishing things wouldn't change and being attached to our comfortable ways. Of course, we can't go through the whole process all the time, but it's worth going

[00:04:36] through step by step a few times, maybe one or two dozen times, until you feel like you have a physical understanding of it. With daily training, I can guarantee that something will shift in you. Daily training is the key.

[00:04:54] Going through the previous steps once or twice will help you learn it, but it won't really matter on a day-to-day basis in your life until you train in it. Daily training is the best method. Here's the training plan I recommend.

[00:05:09] Number one, sit for five minutes in the morning. Feel free to start with just two minutes and work your way to five. When five minutes is too short, extend it to ten. Practice the steps from before. Don't let yourself move for those five minutes.

[00:05:25] Just sit still and practice. Number two, practice during the day. After a week, in addition to the morning training, try to notice when you're stressed or resisting change. When that happens, think of it as a mindfulness bell that is calling on you to practice.

[00:05:43] Pause if you can and practice even for a few moments. You don't have to go through the whole process, just the parts that you have time for that are most helpful to you in the moment. Journal how these two trainings go and share with someone else.

[00:05:58] Number three, intermediate, give yourself some discomfort training. After you do the first two trainings for at least a month, and two months is even better, set aside five or ten minutes each day for discomfort training.

[00:06:13] For example, difficult exercise, or a cold shower, or a writing session every morning. This session is supposed to be more than mildly uncomfortable, but not crazy uncomfortable. Somewhere in the middle. As you put yourself in this discomfort, practice the steps from before.

[00:06:32] It's more challenging than morning meditation, but doable. And number four, advanced. After you practice for six months to a year, go on a week-long meditation retreat. It'll deepen your practice. Or go through a week of drastic change that you put yourself into on purpose.

[00:06:51] For example, purposely travel around the world with very little, like less than eight pounds in a small backpack. Or go on a week-long hike using the ultralight approach. The point of this kind of training is to give yourself an extended period of practicing

[00:07:07] with the method from before, not to see how tough you are or anything like that. Note, it's possible life will give you an unexpected month or more of incredible change, losing a loved one while changing jobs, or getting an illness while dealing with financial problems.

[00:07:24] If that happens, think of it as a gift of advanced training. So that's the training. I recommend just the first two steps for most people. I think it will make a world of difference.

[00:07:36] The next two steps are if you want to master the method, which isn't necessary to see some benefits. This is a form of self-care. In addition, other forms of self-care are also recommended, like going for a walk, exercise,

[00:07:52] taking a bath, doing yoga, eating well, getting sleep, having a support network to talk things out with, getting out in nature, and creating space for solitude and silence. These are all important. If you go deep into this practice, you'll see some profound shifts. I know I have. Quote,

[00:08:12] If we're willing to give up hope that insecurity and pain can be eliminated, then we can have the courage to relax with the groundlessness of our situation. This is the first step on the path. Pay my children.

[00:08:31] You just listened to part 2 of the post titled, How to Get Good at Dealing with Massive Change by Leo Babauta of zenhabits.net and I'll be right back with my commentary. Thank you again to Leo. I'm sure the practice he suggested can work.

[00:08:47] I think that difficulty is actually doing it, right? It takes time and work. Usually we're busy, adding one more thing to our plates, as nice as the practice or the benefits of the practice sounds. We just don't make it happen.

[00:09:04] There was a period in my life after business school when I wasn't quite sure what I was going to be doing, when I took some time off to volunteer up in the Rocky Mountains at a meditation retreat center. That was a bit of a reset for me.

[00:09:17] I was able to practice mindfulness and meditation many hours a day. And fun fact, I attended a class by Pay My Children who was quoted at the end of this article today. But anyway, that reset gave me the opportunity to build a meditation practice into my day

[00:09:34] and then keep it. Now that might not be possible for you, but when trying to implement something like this, maybe you can get someone to do it with you, a support network. Or find something extra enjoyable that makes you actually want to do that practice.

[00:09:51] We need that motivation to implement some of these things that we hear on this show. So hopefully you can find what best motivates you. But that should do it for today. Have a great weekend. Hopefully ready to take on some change.

[00:10:05] And I'll be back tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.