3119: The Weight of Emotional Clutter - And 4 Steps to Letting Go by Erica Layne with NoSidebar

[00:00:00] Before we start, please check out our new podcast Good Sleep. Have you ever noticed how a calm mind can really set the stage for a good night's sleep? That's the idea behind our new podcast Good Sleep. Greg, our host from Optimal Relationships Daily is here to help ease you into a peaceful night's rest with some positive affirmations and these affirmations aren't just comforting. They can help ease anxiety and nurture positive thoughts, setting you up for true Good Sleep.

[00:00:30] Just search for Good Sleep in your podcast app and be sure to pick the one from Optimal Living Daily.

[00:00:37] This is Optimal Living Daily Episode 3119, The Weight of Emotional Clutter and Four Steps to Let and Go by Eric Olene with NoSideBar.com.

[00:00:48] And I'm Justin Malik and we're going to jump right into today's post as we optimize your life.

[00:00:54] The Weight of Emotional Clutter and Four Steps to Let and Go by Eric Olene with NoSideBar.com.

[00:01:05] I've struggled for most of my life with this recurring thought. No one really sees or appreciates the things I do.

[00:01:13] I can vividly remember venting this frustration with tears filling my eyes to a mentor of mine as early as my mid teens.

[00:01:21] And it only became more pronounced when I started my career, got married and had children. Toddlers are not known for articulating their heartfelt thanks.

[00:01:31] But over the last few years, I've begun to recognize this internal narrative as emotional clutter. It weighs me down and creates resistance in my soul.

[00:01:42] It holds me back from focusing on the good. I'm now working hard every day to throw out the manual I had for how others should act,

[00:01:51] to stop waiting for them to notice my efforts and to instead own that I do the things I do because I want to.

[00:01:59] I declutter our home because I enjoy a tidy, visually peaceful environment and the satisfaction of my hard work.

[00:02:07] I give my husband and children my best because I love them and want the best for them too.

[00:02:13] I've by no means mastered this new way of thinking, but I feel emotional freedom as I move in this direction.

[00:02:21] Do you have emotional clutter that's swaying you down?

[00:02:24] Most of us are familiar with the weight of physical clutter, but emotional clutter has a weight of its own.

[00:02:31] Emotional clutter is a type of clutter that is the most unseen but has the greatest impact on your happiness and well-being.

[00:02:39] This clutter is made up of persistent thoughts that are so familiar they may almost feel like old friends,

[00:02:46] except when you drag them out into the light of day you realize that they aren't friends at all. They never were.

[00:02:53] Here's some common thought loops that can drain our emotional energy.

[00:02:57] Do any of these sound familiar? If you were to make your own list, what would you add?

[00:03:02] I do everything around here. No one really cares about me.

[00:03:07] My boss or partner or child doesn't appreciate me.

[00:03:11] I'm a bad parent or partner or sibling or friend.

[00:03:16] I'm terrible at making friends. I'm so awkward, I'm bad at talking to people. I'm not cut out for this.

[00:03:24] The more you allow yourself to think these types of thoughts, the deeper the pathways they carve in your brain.

[00:03:31] This is why it may feel like your negative thoughts run on autopilot.

[00:03:35] Thankfully our brains are malleable. In scientific terms this is called neuroplacicity.

[00:03:42] This means that with conscious effort and consistent practice over time, you can actually short circuit negative thoughts

[00:03:49] and slowly replace them with better feeling thought loops.

[00:03:53] Four steps to letting go of emotional clutter.

[00:03:57] Number one, start by identifying the harmful scripts that are playing out in your mind.

[00:04:03] Write them down, get to know them. Notice them the next time they arise and question them instead of accepting them as truth as you may have in the past.

[00:04:13] Number two, make small shifts to more positive thoughts.

[00:04:18] Once you've identified a recurring negative loop, don't try to immediately switch to a thought that's 180 degrees from the original. Your brain won't buy it.

[00:04:27] For example, it's a big leap to go from nobody cares about me to everyone loves me.

[00:04:34] Instead, make a small positive shift that you really believe such as my family cares about me and I care about myself.

[00:04:44] Number three, repeat, repeat, repeat.

[00:04:48] To replace the negative pathway previously carved in your brain, you'll need to create a new one.

[00:04:54] And the way to do that is by running the new thought through your brain over and over again.

[00:05:01] Consciously repeat that new thought loop in your mind every time the old one comes up. Write it in your journal every day.

[00:05:08] Speak it out loud while you drive a familiar route, while you take a walk in nature or while you look at yourself in a mirror.

[00:05:16] Repeat it so much that your brain slowly starts taking this path on automatic rather than the old one.

[00:05:23] And number four, reinforce your work with self-love and self-care.

[00:05:29] This is deep work. It's very different from clearing out the junk drawer in your kitchen or the clutter in your attic.

[00:05:35] It has an emotional component that I think requires plenty of compassion towards yourself as you struggle through the process.

[00:05:42] Keep yourself short up by practicing purposeful self-care and remembering that you are whole and beautiful and worthy no matter what.

[00:05:52] You'll learn to build a life based on what you really value and you'll simplify everything from you, your home, and family life to your work, relationships, and your use of time.

[00:06:05] Most importantly, you'll discover the peace and joy of living with less.

[00:06:14] You just listen to the post titled The Weight of Emotional Clutter and Four Steps to Let It Go.

[00:06:20] I air it a lane with no sidebar.com, and I'll be right back with my commentary.

[00:06:25] Being in control of my health means being super mindful of what I put in my body which is why I'm so excited to tell you all about Thorn.

[00:06:32] Thorn takes up personalize and scientific approach to health and wellness with their supplements.

[00:06:37] They manufacture all their supplements in the US using top notch ingredients sourced globally.

[00:06:42] Plus, they team up with leading medical professionals to bring highly effective nutritional supplements to over 5 million customers, 47,000 health care pros, and 100-plus pro sports teams including multiple US national teams.

[00:06:56] I got their product GI relief which has ingredients shown to help gastrointestinal discomfort and it's helping me.

[00:07:02] And I particularly love that all the Thorn supplements I checked which were independently tested were approved or even ranked as the lab's top choice.

[00:07:11] Give your body what it really needs with Thorn.

[00:07:14] Go to Thorn.fit slash optimal and use code optimal for 10% off your first order.

[00:07:20] That's THORNE.FIT slash optimal code optimal for 10% off your first order.

[00:07:28] Thorn.fit slash optimal code optimal.

[00:07:31] These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration.

[00:07:35] This product is not limited to diagnosed, treat, cure or prevent any disease.

[00:07:40] Thank you to Erica.

[00:07:42] Actually, an area from her site too, EricaLane.co, but this one was a guest article on no sidebar.

[00:07:49] And it's another take on a common theme for this week about figuring out our own self-limiting beliefs.

[00:07:55] And we talked about this yesterday and earlier too.

[00:07:59] Our own belief that we tend to claw onto is something that comes up pretty regularly here and for good reason.

[00:08:05] And I thought these were some great steps to take.

[00:08:08] It's definitely not easy to free ourselves of thought patterns that we could have almost since birth.

[00:08:15] You could take help from a professional, but some of these definitely can be worked on if we're able to become aware of them in the first place.

[00:08:23] So how do you become aware of them? Also not easy.

[00:08:27] And outside of having professional help, you can take a lot of work and practice.

[00:08:32] Something done daily and consistently.

[00:08:35] And something like journaling or meditation can help.

[00:08:38] The first step in pretty much everything we talk about here is awareness.

[00:08:42] And for me, I found something daily like this podcast can help too because it's a constant touch point of us questioning something in our lives.

[00:08:51] The more we do that, the more things begin to unravel in a good way.

[00:08:56] We can challenge some of the things that we might have thought were permanent or didn't even know existed in the first place.

[00:09:03] So thank you for being here for the daily practice. It means a lot.

[00:09:06] Couldn't do this without you.

[00:09:08] Have a great rest of your day and I'll see you over the weekend where your optimal life awaits.