3146: Building Your Routine by Danae Smith of This Wondrous Life on Intentional Living & Self-Improvement

[00:00:00] This is Optimal Living Daily, Episode 3146, Building Your Routine by Denay Smith of ThisWondrousLife.com

[00:00:09] and I'm your narrator Justin Malik, reading you blogs every single day of the year including holidays.

[00:00:14] And without further ado, let's get right to it as we optimize your life.

[00:00:22] Building Your Routine by Denay Smith of ThisWondrousLife.com

[00:00:28] We spend the first 18 to 22 years of our lives with some form of routine or structure.

[00:00:34] Take for instance school, in a general experience you grew up with the routine of waking up and going to school

[00:00:40] followed by extracurricular activities. The moment one leaves that, it falls into their hands.

[00:00:47] For me it was at the end of my college days that sustaining a consistent structure was my responsibility.

[00:00:52] No longer did I have a set of classes to attend from 9 to 4pm, followed by a dinner or night shift at the campus coffee shop.

[00:00:59] No longer were my friends just a hop and a skip away for a hang. Life after college revealed to me the value of having structure

[00:01:07] and how intentional we have to be to sustain it.

[00:01:10] It wasn't until about four years ago that I was drawn to this concept of a routine.

[00:01:15] I could feel my life falling into a steady pattern that was not life giving. It was honestly empty and time wise wasteful.

[00:01:24] Choosing to pursue a consistent routine for each morning and evening was the wake up call I needed.

[00:01:30] Since then it has been an invitation and challenge I step into.

[00:01:34] It hasn't been a cakewalk but it has transformed how I approach each day.

[00:01:39] Having a daily routine or system as James Clear would say has kept me grounded, providing a safe harbor to lean into when life swirls.

[00:01:49] Unexpected circumstances arise, work gets busier than usual, life honestly happens.

[00:01:56] We can all make a laundry list of how life can spiral within a moment.

[00:01:59] Having a daily routine has given me a harbor of familiarity and consistency that when everything else may be in an abnormal state,

[00:02:07] this one part of my day is not.

[00:02:10] It has allowed me to remain connected to myself and heart.

[00:02:15] Developing a daily routine has also given me space to connect with myself and my heart before I start my day and when I end it.

[00:02:23] Having this in place has helped me to not disconnect from myself as the day unfolds.

[00:02:29] It has made room for creativity to flourish.

[00:02:33] Having a routine has fostered creativity in the most practical way possible.

[00:02:37] I incorporated creativity in my routine.

[00:02:40] Whether it's writing for a few minutes or reading something, creativity has flourished because I made room for it by connecting it to my daily routine.

[00:02:50] And it has instilled new, healthier habits.

[00:02:53] There have definitely been times that my routine didn't go as planned.

[00:02:57] I wake up late or work required me to come in earlier or leave later.

[00:03:01] Even so, because I've been doing it a while, the activities that were part of my routine became habitual that even when things didn't go as planned,

[00:03:10] I was able to weave it into my day.

[00:03:12] All this to say, I'm leaning into this space more this year.

[00:03:17] Last year was a whirlwind of transition and newness that had become like a days ago with my systems.

[00:03:23] I started James Clear's Atomic Habits and it has confirmed the value and importance of having systems, or as I would say, routines.

[00:03:31] I'm a firm believer in having a daily routine and in having one, it helps sustain the pursuit of everything else.

[00:03:38] Clear writes, quote,

[00:03:40] The purpose of setting goals is to win the game.

[00:03:43] The purpose of building systems is to continue playing the game.

[00:03:47] True long-term thinking is goalless thinking.

[00:03:51] It's not about any single accomplishment.

[00:03:53] It's about the cycle of endless refinement and continuous improvement.

[00:03:58] Ultimately, it is your commitment to the process that will determine your progress, end quote.

[00:04:05] For so long, I was super goals, goals, goals, setting goals, planning goals, achieving goals.

[00:04:11] I never understood why none of it seemed to sustain or I felt dissatisfied after until I read the previous quote.

[00:04:19] Hear me out, having goals and setting them is good. It's not a bad thing, but having a system is what sustains you.

[00:04:26] Why? Because it actually allows you to not only achieve your goals, but to thrive after it's been attained.

[00:04:34] When we live to just achieve or gain something, we will always feel restless or even discontent.

[00:04:41] But when we live committed to the process as Clear writes, when we live out our systems leaning into small changes daily,

[00:04:48] we have more we are going after. We have more to stand on.

[00:04:52] Now all this is fine and dandy, but how do we actually do this?

[00:04:56] There are four things I associate with building a routine.

[00:04:59] Decide, ask, write and live. Decide.

[00:05:05] Before anything else, you have to decide you want change. You have to make the intentional choice to shift the pattern of your daily life.

[00:05:14] Ask. Check in with yourself. Your habits and tendencies are important in building a routine.

[00:05:20] Examining the flow of your day to day, the habits you formed and asking the right questions is also crucial.

[00:05:26] James Clear has a cool resource to help with this called the Habit Scorecard.

[00:05:30] This resource allows you to assess your daily habits so you are able to see where you want to change.

[00:05:35] Write. The discoveries you make when asking yourself questions and examining your patterns help shape what your routine needs.

[00:05:43] From there, you got to write it down.

[00:05:45] Visualize what you want to do differently. Define what you desire your daily routine to look like and write it down.

[00:05:52] And live.

[00:05:54] After all of that, you simply have to do it. Building a routine or developing new systems is not instantaneous.

[00:06:00] It requires daily commitment and active choice.

[00:06:04] It is constant pursuit. It's a practice of self-awareness and connection.

[00:06:08] It truly is a day-by-day process, but it's in the action that you truly find what works, what's needed, and what you can do without.

[00:06:17] Quote, when you fall in love with a process rather than the product, you don't have to wait to give yourself permission to be happy.

[00:06:24] You can be satisfied anytime your system is running.

[00:06:27] And a system can be successful in many different forms, not just the one you first envision.

[00:06:33] James Clear.

[00:06:35] As we pursue living intentional lives, we have to fall in love with the process.

[00:06:40] We cannot be so fixated on outcomes and results that we miss the best part, the journey.

[00:06:45] What I love about this quote is the last line.

[00:06:48] And a system can be successful in many different forms, not just the one you first envision.

[00:06:53] I've seen this firsthand.

[00:06:55] My daily routines have transformed over the years.

[00:06:57] They've taken different shapes as the season required.

[00:07:00] Yet what has remained is the heart of it and the framework.

[00:07:04] It may look different each day, but the intention remains the same.

[00:07:08] This year my dream is to truly live out my systems.

[00:07:12] I want to clarify my intentions and put purpose behind each activity.

[00:07:16] Every moment, every task, and experience is an invitation to intention, slowness, and wonder.

[00:07:24] I desire to not just build routines and systems to be trendy.

[00:07:28] I desire to build these things to sustain and thrive in the life I create.

[00:07:38] You just listened to the post titled, Building Your Routine by Denay Smith of ThisWonderousLife.com

[00:07:44] And I'll be right back with my commentary.

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[00:08:53] Thinking it to nay, is a good tip about goals versus process.

[00:08:57] Even with this podcast I get the question often from other podcasters

[00:09:01] how do you manage to release an episode every single day

[00:09:05] or produce 35 episodes a week and get through all of that content?

[00:09:10] Well, I never set a goal. I can tell you that.

[00:09:13] I made sort of fake goals in my head like

[00:09:16] I can't wait until this show gets a thousand listens. That would be amazing.

[00:09:20] I think that goal was broken within a week of launching, maybe even days.

[00:09:24] So then I remember thinking, okay by the end of one year

[00:09:28] I want to get to 100,000 listens. That was done in only seven weeks.

[00:09:33] After that I stopped paying attention to those types of goals

[00:09:36] and instead focused on the process of adding more shows

[00:09:40] and growing those too.

[00:09:42] I learned to enjoy the building of the systems

[00:09:45] and now it's just sort of ingrained in me. It's what I do.

[00:09:48] I think that's what people who have been exercising consistently for example

[00:09:52] for years, that's what they would say.

[00:09:54] They might have had a goal to lift a certain number of pounds

[00:09:58] or workout X number of times per week

[00:10:01] but after some time it's probably just their lifestyle.

[00:10:05] They might still track the numbers of sets and reps

[00:10:08] and the weight or whatever. But maybe there is no more goal.

[00:10:11] I think that's totally okay.

[00:10:13] Some other authors we have agree too.

[00:10:15] I remember Leo Babout of Zen Habits had a post years ago

[00:10:18] about getting rid of goals.

[00:10:20] But hey, if they're helping you maybe don't get rid of them.

[00:10:23] Instead see if anything you heard today makes sense for you

[00:10:26] or for where you're struggling with progress.

[00:10:29] Maybe today's post can make the difference.

[00:10:31] Let me know how it goes. Thank you for listening and being here

[00:10:34] and for subscribing to the show.

[00:10:36] Have a great rest of your day and I'll be back tomorrow as usual

[00:10:39] where your optimal life awaits.