3147: How to Finally Say Goodbye to Sentimental Items by Kerri Richardson on Emotional Liberation & Clarity

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[00:00:27] It's a minimalist Monday edition of Optimal Living Daily Episode 3147

[00:00:32] How to finally say goodbye to sentimental items

[00:00:36] By Kerry Richardson of KerryRichardson.com

[00:00:39] And I'm Justin Malik

[00:00:40] Happy Monday, welcome back to Optimal Living Daily

[00:00:43] Where I simply read to you with permission from the authors

[00:00:47] Just an article a day that adds up over time

[00:00:50] To create a bit more meaning, inspiration and happiness in our lives

[00:00:55] And we're going to get right to our minimalist Monday post

[00:00:57] As we optimize your life

[00:01:04] How to finally say goodbye to sentimental items

[00:01:07] By Kerry Richardson of KerryRichardson.com

[00:01:12] Today would have been my parents 60th wedding anniversary

[00:01:15] Well, I guess it still is

[00:01:17] Even though my father is celebrating on the other side

[00:01:20] It's quite a milestone

[00:01:22] Ever since my dad passed away almost two years ago

[00:01:25] I've thought about how great it would be

[00:01:27] If he could come back to human form a few days a year

[00:01:30] For special occasions such as this one

[00:01:32] You'd think with all the brilliant science minds out there

[00:01:36] Someone could make this happen

[00:01:37] Until it does, I'll keep relying on my memories of him

[00:01:41] I talk to a lot of people who share how difficult it is

[00:01:44] For them to let go of sentimental items

[00:01:47] Particularly those given to them by a loved one

[00:01:50] Who has since passed or something that belonged to a deceased loved one

[00:01:55] When considering letting go of these types of items

[00:01:58] There are a couple important things to remember

[00:02:01] Number one, the memory you have of that person

[00:02:05] Lives in your heart, not in the item

[00:02:08] And number two, if you no longer love the item

[00:02:11] It's more honoring to let it go

[00:02:14] And keep the relationship you have or had with your loved one

[00:02:17] Clean and uncluttered without any shred of resentment

[00:02:21] Or the weight of obligation

[00:02:23] The love-filled place where they now reside

[00:02:26] Has no use for these lower consciousness emotions

[00:02:29] They want nothing but joy and peace for you

[00:02:33] My father once bought me a beautiful music box

[00:02:36] In the shape of a phonograph

[00:02:38] I remember the day he gave it to me like it was yesterday

[00:02:41] He and my mother had come to visit my sister and me

[00:02:44] And we were all poking around some gift shops

[00:02:47] Which I'm sure was not how my dad wanted to spend the day

[00:02:51] After finishing at a store

[00:02:53] We got back in the car and he handed me a bag

[00:02:56] I thought you might like this kid, my dad said

[00:02:59] I could still see the joy on his face as I pulled the music box out of the bag

[00:03:04] I turned it upside down and wound it up

[00:03:07] The most beautiful song emitted that instantly made me smile

[00:03:11] Thanks dad, I love it, I said

[00:03:14] And I really did, I loved it

[00:03:16] What I loved even more was his thoughtfulness and joy in presenting it to me

[00:03:22] That music box sat proudly on a shelf above my desk

[00:03:26] Until one day when it fell and broke beyond repair

[00:03:30] Because of who gave it to me and the memory of that day

[00:03:34] I kept it in pieces on my desk for weeks

[00:03:38] That was until I realized looking at it made me sad

[00:03:42] It no longer gave me the heartwarming memory of our day together

[00:03:46] All I thought about was how disappointed I was that it broke

[00:03:51] It was time to get rid of it

[00:03:53] But I was hesitant

[00:03:55] I felt as if I was being disrespectful and ungrateful

[00:03:59] And then I got myself in check and realized that was the story I was telling myself

[00:04:03] Or hints of an old belief waving its finger at me

[00:04:07] Then I remember what I tell my clients and students

[00:04:11] Whoever gave you that item never intended to wrap up guilt and obligation with it

[00:04:17] If you're no longer enjoying it for whatever reason

[00:04:20] The respectful thing to do for your relationship with that person or the memory of that person

[00:04:26] Is to let it go

[00:04:28] So I threw out the pieces of the music box

[00:04:31] Man, while I miss it

[00:04:32] I get to enjoy the memory of that day again

[00:04:35] By no longer having the obliterated remnants staring me in the face

[00:04:41] Even now in this moment

[00:04:43] I think about that gift and our day together with love

[00:04:47] Even without the box being on my desk

[00:04:50] The box broke, but my memory didn't

[00:04:54] I can hear your resistance from here

[00:04:57] Yeah, but my item isn't broken

[00:04:59] I just don't want it anymore

[00:05:01] It feels wrong to get rid of it just because I don't like it anymore

[00:05:06] Well, you could always break it

[00:05:08] Kidding

[00:05:09] Sure, it may have been easier for me to get rid of my sentimental item because of its condition

[00:05:14] However, sometimes things are broken on the inside

[00:05:19] For instance, I have a beautiful blouse that I bought a couple years ago

[00:05:23] The practical part of me says to keep it because it's in perfect condition

[00:05:28] It's a flattering color on me

[00:05:30] And it's a good fit

[00:05:32] The problem?

[00:05:33] I bought it to wear it to my father's wake

[00:05:36] I wear it every now and then, but every time I pull it from the closet

[00:05:40] I'm reminded of that day

[00:05:43] And strangely enough, something about adorning it feels respectful of my father

[00:05:48] Even though it makes me sad to see it in my closet

[00:05:51] Would I be dishonoring him by getting rid of it?

[00:05:55] Logical care he says, of course not

[00:05:57] Emotional care he says

[00:05:59] Well yeah, you kinda would be

[00:06:02] The mental gymnastics are real, my friend

[00:06:05] However, just last night, I decided to let it go and I added it to the donations box

[00:06:11] It's time to let someone else wear it with joy

[00:06:14] The sadness attached to it for me beats out the BS story I tell myself about it

[00:06:19] Being disrespectful to get rid of it

[00:06:22] Although the blouse is in perfect condition

[00:06:24] What it represents feels the same as the broken music box

[00:06:29] Are you wrestling with sentimental items?

[00:06:32] If so, consider this

[00:06:34] Think about where these items are kept

[00:06:37] If they've been sitting in a box in your basement for the last five years

[00:06:40] They might not mean as much to you as you say

[00:06:44] And if you don't love these items enough to use them or display them, they're clutter

[00:06:49] If you do really love them, honor them, display them, use them

[00:06:54] This way you can benefit daily from the joy they bring you

[00:06:58] Whenever you struggle with what to keep and what to clear

[00:07:01] Remember this mantra

[00:07:03] If you don't love it, need it, or use it, it's clutter

[00:07:08] Clutter clogs the channels of opportunity and abundance

[00:07:11] And I'm sure, like me, you have big plans for your life

[00:07:15] You don't need things holding you back

[00:07:19] As Elizabeth Gilbert once said

[00:07:21] Don't let your house become a museum of grief

[00:07:26] You just listened to the post titled

[00:07:31] How to Finally Say Goodbye to Sentimental Items

[00:07:34] by Carrie Richardson of CarrieRichardson.com

[00:07:38] And I'll be right back with my commentary

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[00:08:46] This episode is brought to you by sacks.com

[00:08:50] At sacks.com it's easy to find your new vibe

[00:08:53] Dive into the western trend with gold cowboy boots from stott

[00:08:56] Or go full 90s throwback with platforms from Prada

[00:09:00] You can shop for everything on your agenda

[00:09:02] Whether it's a breezy Zimmerman dress for garden party

[00:09:05] Or a bright chloe blazer for brunch

[00:09:08] Find inspiration for your new vibe

[00:09:10] Every day at sacks.com

[00:09:14] Thank you to Carrie

[00:09:15] This is probably one of the most common questions I see when it comes to minimalism

[00:09:20] What to do about sentimental items

[00:09:23] But just asking that question to me means you're looking for a reason or permission really

[00:09:29] To get rid of something

[00:09:31] And you might be feeling guilty about it

[00:09:33] But there's a good quote in there

[00:09:35] She said whoever gave you that item never intended to wrap up guilt and obligation with it

[00:09:41] If you are no longer enjoying it for whatever reason

[00:09:44] The respectful thing to do for your relationship with that person

[00:09:48] Or the memory of that person

[00:09:50] Is to let it go

[00:09:52] And I think that's true

[00:09:53] Whoever gave it to you

[00:09:55] If it has meaning

[00:09:56] They gave it to you to bring joy into your life

[00:09:59] And if it's doing anything but adding joy

[00:10:03] Wouldn't they want you to do something about that?

[00:10:06] Plus it doesn't have to be trashed

[00:10:08] It could be donated to someone in need

[00:10:10] It can possibly bring joy to another person

[00:10:13] Spreading the happiness

[00:10:15] Which would also probably make the person who gave it to you happy

[00:10:18] So I think if it seems like you're looking for permission to do it

[00:10:23] Well just do it

[00:10:24] And you can always take a picture of the item before moving on

[00:10:28] Something to think about as we start the week and for minimalist Monday

[00:10:31] Have a great start to your weekend

[00:10:33] I'll catch you tomorrow with another article

[00:10:35] Where your optimal life awaits