3338: On Chasing Rainbows - Dreams vs Fantasies by Helene Massicotte of Free to Pursue

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[00:01:00] On Chasing Rainbows Dreams vs Fantasies by Helene Massicotte of Free to Pursue.com

[00:01:06] And I'm Justin Malik, reading to you every day covering happiness, productivity, self-help,

[00:01:12] minimalism and more.

[00:01:14] Today's post coming from Helene Massicotte, so with that, let's get right to it and start

[00:01:18] optimizing your life.

[00:01:24] On Chasing Rainbows Dreams vs Fantasies by Helene Massicotte of Free to Pursue.com

[00:01:31] I've met a number of rainbow chasers over the last number of weeks.

[00:01:36] I'm sure you have too. They're all around us.

[00:01:38] Their head is in the sand, in the clouds.

[00:01:41] It's anywhere other than where it matters most.

[00:01:44] I know the type. I used to be one.

[00:01:47] I used to chase rainbows. Those fantasies we're all taught to chase.

[00:01:51] But fantasies aren't our dreams.

[00:01:54] Their ideas we know deep down aren't real, but we kid ourselves into thinking they'll

[00:01:59] solve our problems forever.

[00:02:02] Conversely, dreams are desired future states that are plausible.

[00:02:08] In what you can picture, you're still you, only better and more fulfilled.

[00:02:13] It's not perfect, but it's the good life you aspire to.

[00:02:17] It's a potential future state of what's real.

[00:02:20] Here's a short list to help illustrate the contrast.

[00:02:24] Dream, a future state that's more in line with who we are and what we care about.

[00:02:29] We see ourselves achieve a goal that will make us see ourselves differently.

[00:02:33] We want the personal satisfaction that will come with achieving this dream.

[00:02:38] Our dream focuses on what we care about most, the feeling of being complete, purposeful.

[00:02:44] It's intrinsically driven.

[00:02:46] It's more about what we create than what we acquire.

[00:02:49] It's a state that's true to ourselves.

[00:02:52] We focus on a potential future reality.

[00:02:56] In fantasy, a future state that is perfect.

[00:03:00] Nothing is messy or out of place.

[00:03:02] We lust after what we can picture.

[00:03:04] It's surreal.

[00:03:05] It's our life superhero style.

[00:03:07] We want to achieve it because of how others will perceive us.

[00:03:11] The fantasy often focuses on aesthetics, the unreal, the empty pursuits.

[00:03:17] Our fantasies are extrinsically driven.

[00:03:19] It's more about what we could capture or acquire than what we feel we can create.

[00:03:24] We chase fiction.

[00:03:26] We know the difference.

[00:03:28] From a young age, we know the difference between make-believe and the real world.

[00:03:33] We use our imagination to entertain ourselves and to play with others.

[00:03:37] Fantasy is a fun form of escape.

[00:03:39] We get to be and do whatever our imagination can conjure up,

[00:03:43] knowing that we'll get back to more practical everyday matters once the fun is over.

[00:03:49] Fantasy is, well, fantastic as an escape from the everyday.

[00:03:53] We also start to dream about our lives at a young age too.

[00:03:57] We think about what we want to be when we grow up.

[00:04:01] We dream of being an athlete, a firefighter, a ballerina, a painter, a builder, a parent.

[00:04:08] The list is as varied as what we experience as children.

[00:04:12] Dreams tend to be an extension of ourselves and of what we think could be possible in our lives.

[00:04:17] Right or wrong, dreams have boundaries.

[00:04:21] Fantasies don't.

[00:04:23] But despite the built-in limitations, dreams are realizable.

[00:04:27] Even big ones.

[00:04:29] Fantasies can only be chased.

[00:04:31] They'll never materialize.

[00:04:33] Fantasies are about shortcuts to nowhere.

[00:04:37] Dreams are just as much about the journey as they are about the destination.

[00:04:42] We easily forget the difference.

[00:04:46] In today's world, we can easily forget the difference between the two.

[00:04:50] As TLC's 1994 song titled Waterfall suggests,

[00:04:54] we live in a time where we can become convinced that what we have in life

[00:04:58] and the dreams we aspire to aren't enough.

[00:05:01] We start to believe that we have to chase some fictitious version of ourselves,

[00:05:05] perfect looks, perfect stuff,

[00:05:08] perfect partner and kids,

[00:05:10] perfect lifestyle,

[00:05:12] perfect everything.

[00:05:14] Advertisers play a big part in blurring the lines between our dreams and our fantasies.

[00:05:18] They relabel fantasies as dreams.

[00:05:21] They convince us that we'll achieve nirvana by buying their product or service.

[00:05:26] When we capture the rainbow by buying what they're selling,

[00:05:29] we don't get what we thought we'd get, a happier version of ourselves.

[00:05:34] So what do we do?

[00:05:35] We chase the next big promise, the next rainbow.

[00:05:39] This cycle fits the definition of insanity to a T.

[00:05:43] Advertisers need to play that shell game with us because

[00:05:46] a lot of what's involved in actually achieving our dreams don't involve their products.

[00:05:51] Our dreams are more real than any fantasy they can peddle.

[00:05:55] We get to have a taste of a dream every time we move towards it with some action,

[00:05:59] some step that gets us just a little bit closer.

[00:06:03] Best of all, we get to feel the satisfaction of working towards it

[00:06:07] because fulfilling a dream is just as much about the journey,

[00:06:10] the work it takes to get there, as it is the finish line.

[00:06:14] Working on our dreams feels good.

[00:06:17] It feels real.

[00:06:18] It feels like joyful.

[00:06:20] It feels like we're working on a better, truer version of ourselves.

[00:06:24] And fulfilling a dream makes us believe we can keep dreaming and achieving them one by one.

[00:06:29] Dreams are the true stuff of life because you can't live your fantasies,

[00:06:35] but you can and should live your dreams.

[00:06:43] You just listened to the post titled,

[00:06:45] On Chasing Rainbows, Dreams vs Fantasies by Elen Massicotte of freetopersoo.com

[00:06:51] and I'll be right back with my commentary.

[00:06:54] Thank you too, Elen.

[00:06:55] She made a great point that we actually do know the difference between fantasy and real life,

[00:07:00] we always have,

[00:07:02] yet we can trick ourselves into thinking that they're the same or equivalent.

[00:07:06] It's funny how that works.

[00:07:08] But she had a great quote in there that I think sums it up and I'll leave you with for this episode.

[00:07:13] Fantasies are about shortcuts to nowhere.

[00:07:17] Dreams are just as much about the journey as they are about the destination.

[00:07:22] So keep that in mind this week.

[00:07:23] Thank you for listening and being here.

[00:07:25] Have a great rest of your day and I'll see you tomorrow

[00:07:27] where your optimal life awaits.