3340: Choose One of These Two Ways to Change by Anthony Ongaro of Break the Twitch on Personal Growth

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: This is Optimal Living Daily. Choose One of These Two Ways to Change by Anthony Ongaro of BreaktheTwitch.com

[00:00:07] [SPEAKER_00]: and I'm Justin Malik. I read an article every day of the year and give a little bit of commentary

[00:00:12] [SPEAKER_00]: at the end just to give us both a bit more inspiration, motivation, or happiness in our days.

[00:00:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Really adds up in my experience. So with that let's get right to our next one as we optimize your life.

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Choose One of These Two Ways to Change by Anthony Ongaro of BreaktheTwitch.com

[00:00:35] [SPEAKER_00]: For as long as I can remember, I've been super into personal development,

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_00]: habits, and other intentional living topics. Even when I was 12 or 13 years old you could find me

[00:00:46] [SPEAKER_00]: in the self-help section of the Borders Bookstore in Ann Arbor, Michigan. May it rest in peace.

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_00]: This is to say that I've spent decades thinking about this beyond the six years

[00:00:56] [SPEAKER_00]: that I've spent making content and exploring this stuff here at BreaktheTwitch.

[00:01:01] [SPEAKER_00]: And throughout this time, I found that there are only two effective ways to change your life,

[00:01:06] [SPEAKER_00]: at least change your life sustainably. So what are they? Number One, Slow and Steady.

[00:01:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Well one of the ways to change your life is slow and steadily. If you've been with me

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_00]: here at BreaktheTwitch for even a small amount of time, you've most certainly heard me

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_00]: talk about the power of small, consistent changes. I mentioned this quote from Annie Dillard a lot,

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_00]: How We Spend Our Day is, of course, how we spend our lives, end quote.

[00:01:35] [SPEAKER_00]: It's the little things we do each day that become who we are. We're no longer just

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_00]: a person who runs, we are a runner. Not a person who lifts, but a weight lifter.

[00:01:46] [SPEAKER_00]: We become the things that we do. This slow and steady option is incredibly effective

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_00]: because anytime we make a change in our lives, we're breaking out of the status quo.

[00:01:57] [SPEAKER_00]: We're breaking out of our comfort zones, what we're used to. And often we can only do that

[00:02:02] [SPEAKER_00]: at little bits at a time. Imagine if I told you to learn to speak Spanish in a day.

[00:02:08] [SPEAKER_00]: That'd be an overwhelming task. In fact, you might not even know where to get started.

[00:02:13] [SPEAKER_00]: But if I asked you to learn just how to say hello in Spanish, could you do that?

[00:02:18] [SPEAKER_00]: Yes, you absolutely could do that. Ola. It's just one word. But it's learning a new word

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_00]: consistently that creates a vocabulary in Spanish. And eventually, you're not just a person who is

[00:02:29] [SPEAKER_00]: learning a few words of Spanish. You're a language learner and then eventually, a Spanish speaker.

[00:02:35] [SPEAKER_00]: And number two, burning the bridge. There is a second option to create sustainable change

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_00]: in your life, whether it's learning Spanish or something else. And that is burning the bridge.

[00:02:47] [SPEAKER_00]: Here's how that works. Burning the bridge would be changing something drastically in a way that makes

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_00]: it incredibly difficult to go back to what you were doing before. Because if you make a big change

[00:02:58] [SPEAKER_00]: that is really uncomfortable, it can be really hard to sustain it unless you have some friction

[00:03:03] [SPEAKER_00]: between you and your comfort zone. The example I gave earlier, learning Spanish in a

[00:03:09] [SPEAKER_00]: short period of time is a completely overwhelming proposition. But what if you were on a plane

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_00]: to a Spanish speaking country where you didn't know anyone at all, and you stayed there for three

[00:03:20] [SPEAKER_00]: months? What do you think would happen? I'd be willing to bet that in that environment,

[00:03:25] [SPEAKER_00]: you would learn Spanish a heck of a lot faster because it will literally come down to your

[00:03:29] [SPEAKER_00]: survival. Asking for food, asking for things that you need, communicating, and making friends.

[00:03:37] [SPEAKER_00]: All of your existence during that time would be in a Spanish speaking country,

[00:03:40] [SPEAKER_00]: and so you need to speak Spanish more than you would back at home, without having a quick way

[00:03:46] [SPEAKER_00]: to escape the discomfort and go back to where your native language is spoken. That's an example

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_00]: of burning the bridge. An example of burning the bridge for me and Amy was selling our house

[00:03:56] [SPEAKER_00]: in Minnesota and making our way down to Phoenix about a year and a half ago. We needed a change,

[00:04:02] [SPEAKER_00]: and while part of us didn't want to move, we knew that taking that big step would push us

[00:04:07] [SPEAKER_00]: out of our comfort zones. There are many ways you can burn bridges in your life to support a change

[00:04:12] [SPEAKER_00]: for the better. While the term may have some negative connotations, when it comes to changing

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_00]: something difficult, I think it can be a really positive thing. You can help yourself stick

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_00]: with a big change by burning the bridge behind you. That way, you won't be able to easily

[00:04:27] [SPEAKER_00]: revert back to what's comfortable when you feel the discomfort or resistance to that big change

[00:04:32] [SPEAKER_00]: you're creating. What you'll find in these situations is that, as humans, we're incredibly

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_00]: adaptable. We will do our best to make it work. The circumstances in 2020 are a perfect example

[00:04:44] [SPEAKER_00]: of that. So if you're going big and fast, burn the bridge to help you keep the change going.

[00:04:50] [SPEAKER_00]: Choosing one of the ways to change

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_00]: It's important to be intentional in the approach we take in changing our lives.

[00:04:58] [SPEAKER_00]: When you change something in your life, which one of the ways to change do you choose?

[00:05:02] [SPEAKER_00]: You can either take the slow, steady, methodical route, or you can go big and fast and burn the

[00:05:08] [SPEAKER_00]: bridge behind you. But you have to choose one. There is no middle path here if you want the

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_00]: change to be sustainable. Those week-long detox diets you see on the cover of magazines at

[00:05:19] [SPEAKER_00]: the grocery store checkout aisle don't do much. Any benefit you see from these quick solutions

[00:05:25] [SPEAKER_00]: will disappear once you stop doing the work. Lasting benefits will be from the

[00:05:31] [SPEAKER_00]: long-term actions you take from the consistent work that's not very sexy. So if the change you

[00:05:37] [SPEAKER_00]: want is big and fast, then you better do some bridge burning behind you to make it stick.

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_00]: In my experience, these two ways to change are what end up creating the most sustainable

[00:05:48] [SPEAKER_00]: lasting impact. What's been your experience? You just listened to the post titled

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_00]: Choose One of These Two Ways to Change by Anthony Anguero of BreaktheTwitch.com

[00:06:02] [SPEAKER_00]: and I'll be right back with my commentary.

[00:06:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you to Anthony. The slow and steady method is a big theme that comes up across pretty much

[00:06:11] [SPEAKER_00]: all of the shows in the Optimal Living-Dealing Network, and probably one of the top five ones

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_00]: that I think we should keep in mind. It's really easy to get sucked into thinking that

[00:06:20] [SPEAKER_00]: big changes will happen quickly. I guess they can and do sometimes, but we shouldn't expect

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: it in most cases. But I think he's right in that burning the bridge can force us to adapt,

[00:06:32] [SPEAKER_00]: making change a bit more drastic. And the language learning example is a great one. Same with moving,

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_00]: because if you put yourself in a very different environment than you're used to,

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_00]: there's going to be so much going on that certain habits and routines will be left behind

[00:06:48] [SPEAKER_00]: while you'll be forced to create new ones. So going into that with an intention of positive

[00:06:53] [SPEAKER_00]: change could work really well. But of course we might not be in a position where we can do that.

[00:06:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Definitely takes being comfortable with being uncomfortable, which is another theme of this show.

[00:07:05] [SPEAKER_00]: But I'll leave it that for today. Thank you for being here and listening every day,

[00:07:08] [SPEAKER_00]: and thank you if you've ever shared this show with someone. That's the greatest thing you can

[00:07:12] [SPEAKER_00]: do to help keep all of this going. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll see you tomorrow,

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_00]: where your Optimal Life awaits.