3397: 6 Things Happy People Never Do by Marc Chernoff of Marc And Angel on Inner Peace and Authentic Joy

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: This is Optimal Living Daily, 6 Things Happy People Never Do by Marc Chernoff of MarcAndAngel.com and your narrator Justin Malik. I read to you every single day of the year from the best articles and blogs I can find, with permission from the authors of course. It's all in an effort to make your and my day even a tiny bit better. And with that let's get right to it as we optimize your life.

[00:00:28] [SPEAKER_00]: 6 Things Happy People Never Do by Marc Chernoff of MarcAndAngel.com

[00:00:35] [SPEAKER_00]: Happiness is not something you postpone for the future, it's something you design into the present.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Happy people do a lot of things. They spend time expressing gratitude, cultivating optimism, practicing kindness, nurturing loving relationships, committing to meaningful goals,

[00:00:54] [SPEAKER_00]: savoring life's little pleasures, and so on and so forth. But, they never, number one, mind other people's business.

[00:01:05] [SPEAKER_00]: Forget about what others are doing. Stop looking at where they are and what they have. Nobody is doing better than you because nobody can do better than you.

[00:01:15] [SPEAKER_00]: You are walking your own path. Sometimes the reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes circumstances

[00:01:23] [SPEAKER_00]: with everyone else's public highlight reel. We listen to the noise of the world instead of ourselves.

[00:01:30] [SPEAKER_00]: So stop the comparisons. Ignore the distractions. Listen to your own inner voice. Mind your own business.

[00:01:38] [SPEAKER_00]: Keep your best wishes and your biggest goals close to your heart and dedicate time to them every day.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't be scared to walk alone and don't be scared to enjoy it.

[00:01:48] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't let anyone's ignorance, drama, or negativity stop you from being the best you can be.

[00:01:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Keep doing what you know in your heart is right for you.

[00:01:59] [SPEAKER_00]: Because when you're focused on meaningful work and at peace with yourself, almost nothing can shake you.

[00:02:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Number two, seek validation of self-worth from others.

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_00]: When you're content to simply be yourself without comparing and competing to impress others, everyone worthwhile will respect you.

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_00]: And even more importantly, you will respect yourself.

[00:02:23] [SPEAKER_00]: How are you letting others define you? What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

[00:02:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Truth be told, no one has the right to judge you.

[00:02:32] [SPEAKER_00]: People may have heard your stories and they may think they know you, but they can't feel what you're going through.

[00:02:37] [SPEAKER_00]: They aren't living your life. So forget what they think and say about you.

[00:02:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Focus on how you feel about yourself and keep walking the path that feels best under your feet.

[00:02:49] [SPEAKER_00]: Those who accept you are your friends.

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_00]: And those who don't are your teachers.

[00:02:55] [SPEAKER_00]: If someone calls you something and it's true, it's not your problem because it's true.

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_00]: If someone calls you something and it's not true, it's not your problem because it's not true.

[00:03:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Either way, whatever they call you is not your problem.

[00:03:07] [SPEAKER_00]: What other people call you is their problem.

[00:03:10] [SPEAKER_00]: What you call yourself and what you decide to become is your problem.

[00:03:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Number three, rely on other people and external events for happiness.

[00:03:22] [SPEAKER_00]: Unhappiness lies in that gap between what we have now and what we think we need.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00]: But the truth is, we don't need to acquire anything more to be content with what we already have.

[00:03:33] [SPEAKER_00]: We don't need anyone else's permission to be happy.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_00]: Your life is magnificent, not because someone says it is or because you have acquired something new,

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_00]: but because you choose to see it as such.

[00:03:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't let your happiness be held hostage.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_00]: It's always yours to choose to live and experience.

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_00]: As soon as you stop making everyone and everything else responsible for your happiness, the happier you'll be.

[00:03:58] [SPEAKER_00]: If you're unhappy now, it's not someone else's fault.

[00:04:02] [SPEAKER_00]: Take full responsibility for your own unhappiness and you'll instantly gain the ability to be happier.

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_00]: Stop seeking in vain to arrange conditions that will make you happy.

[00:04:13] [SPEAKER_00]: Simply choose to appreciate the greatness that is yours in this moment,

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_00]: and the right conditions will start to line up around the contentment you seek.

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_00]: The greater part of your happiness or unhappiness depends upon your outlook and not upon your situation.

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Even if things aren't perfect right now, think of all the beauty still left around you.

[00:04:34] [SPEAKER_00]: A good reason to smile is always one thought away.

[00:04:39] [SPEAKER_00]: Choose to tap into it anytime you like.

[00:04:42] [SPEAKER_00]: Number four, hold on to resentment.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_00]: Let today be the day you stop being haunted by the ghosts from your past.

[00:04:50] [SPEAKER_00]: What happened in the past is just one chapter in your story.

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't close the book, just turn the page.

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_00]: We've all been hurt by our own decisions and by others.

[00:05:00] [SPEAKER_00]: And while the pain of these experiences is normal, sometimes it lingers for too long.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_00]: Feelings of resentment urge us to relive the same pain over and over.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_00]: We have a hard time letting go.

[00:05:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Forgiveness is the remedy.

[00:05:16] [SPEAKER_00]: It allows you to focus on the future without combating the past.

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_00]: To understand the infinite potential of everything going forward is to forgive everything already behind you.

[00:05:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Without forgiveness, wounds can never be healed and personal growth can never be achieved.

[00:05:32] [SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't mean you're erasing the past or forgetting what happened.

[00:05:36] [SPEAKER_00]: It means you're letting go of the resentment and pain and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.

[00:05:44] [SPEAKER_00]: Number five, spend prolonged periods of time in negative environments.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_00]: You can't make positive choices for the rest of your life without an environment that makes those choices easy, natural and enjoyable.

[00:05:59] [SPEAKER_00]: So protect your spirit and potential from contamination by limiting your time with negative people and the environments they inhabit.

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_00]: When other people invite you to act like victims, when they whine and moan about the unfairness of life for example,

[00:06:14] [SPEAKER_00]: and ask you to agree, to offer condolences, and to participate in their grievances, walk away.

[00:06:22] [SPEAKER_00]: When you join in that game of negativity, you always lose.

[00:06:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Even when you're alone, create a positive mental space for yourself.

[00:06:31] [SPEAKER_00]: Make it a point to give up all the thoughts that make you feel bad or even just a few of them that have been troubling you,

[00:06:36] [SPEAKER_00]: and see how doing that changes your life.

[00:06:40] [SPEAKER_00]: You don't need negative thoughts.

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_00]: They are all lies.

[00:06:43] [SPEAKER_00]: They solve nothing.

[00:06:45] [SPEAKER_00]: All they have ever given you is a false self that suffers for no reason.

[00:06:50] [SPEAKER_00]: And number six, resist the truth.

[00:06:54] [SPEAKER_00]: It's a certain death trap when we spend our lives learning how to lie,

[00:06:58] [SPEAKER_00]: because eventually these lies grow so strong in our minds that we become bad at seeing, telling, and living our own truth.

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_00]: Lives come apart so easily when they've been held together with lies.

[00:07:11] [SPEAKER_00]: If you resist the truth, you'll live a lie every day as the truth haunts your thoughts every night.

[00:07:17] [SPEAKER_00]: You simply can't get away from your truth by moving dishonesty from one place to the next.

[00:07:23] [SPEAKER_00]: So don't bend.

[00:07:24] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't water it down.

[00:07:26] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't try to hide the truth with deception.

[00:07:28] [SPEAKER_00]: Don't edit your own soul according to the fashion of what's popular.

[00:07:32] [SPEAKER_00]: It's better to offer no explanation or excuse than a false one.

[00:07:36] [SPEAKER_00]: It takes courage and strength to admit the truth, but it's the only way to truly live.

[00:07:43] [SPEAKER_00]: Accept what is, embrace it fully,

[00:07:45] [SPEAKER_00]: and live for the possibilities that lie ahead.

[00:07:53] [SPEAKER_00]: You just listened to the post titled,

[00:07:55] [SPEAKER_00]: Six Things Happy People Never Do by Mark Chernoff of markandangel.com.

[00:08:00] [SPEAKER_00]: I'll be right back with my commentary.

[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you to Mark.

[00:08:04] [SPEAKER_00]: Some of these may be easier said than done, but good stuff to consider nevertheless.

[00:08:10] [SPEAKER_00]: Like, not minding other people's business and not making comparisons.

[00:08:14] [SPEAKER_00]: Everyone's probably been guilty of this one because it's really easy to get caught up in looking at what everyone else is doing, especially with social media these days.

[00:08:23] [SPEAKER_00]: But I think more than eliminating it altogether or being hard on ourselves for doing it.

[00:08:29] [SPEAKER_00]: Articles like these can help us notice it, become aware of it, and then over time limit it.

[00:08:36] [SPEAKER_00]: It'll still happen from time to time, but we might see it happening less and less over the days, weeks, months, or years.

[00:08:44] [SPEAKER_00]: And like he's saying in this article, happiness is not just about what we're doing, but what we're not doing.

[00:08:52] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:53] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:54] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:56] [SPEAKER_00]: We're not doing that.

[00:08:58] [SPEAKER_00]: So maybe today we can try to catch ourselves when we start falling into these habits.

[00:09:03] [SPEAKER_00]: Maybe next time we find ourselves comparing our lives to someone else's or seeking validation from others,

[00:09:09] [SPEAKER_00]: we can stop and actually think about if this is helping or hurting.

[00:09:15] [SPEAKER_00]: Just that one moment can make our day.

[00:09:19] [SPEAKER_00]: So thank you to Mark for this one.

[00:09:20] [SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for being here and for coming back to listen every day.

[00:09:24] [SPEAKER_00]: That's what helps keep all of this going.

[00:09:27] [SPEAKER_00]: And thank you if you ever shared this show with someone else.

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_00]: It really means a lot.

[00:09:30] [SPEAKER_00]: Have a great rest of your day and I'll see you tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.