3447: Staying Disciplined Vs. Living in the Moment by Greg Audino on Self-Discipline and Happiness

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[00:00:30] This is Optimal Living Daily, Staying Disciplined Vs. Living in the Moment by Greg Audino at greglesaudinoonmedium.com. And I'm Justin Malik. I'm ready to jump right into today's post as we optimize your life.

[00:00:49] Staying Disciplined Vs. Living in the Moment by Greg Audino at greglesaudinoonmedium.com.

[00:00:57] After reading a book of inspirational quotes and listening to three or four Greg Audino types on the internet, many people who get stuck in life will often find solace in going back to the basics and starting fresh.

[00:01:10] The all-I-need-to-do-is-this attitude kicks in, and the next day is the beginning of their new lives.

[00:01:17] Whether or not they follow through and commit to changing themselves varies from person to person, of course.

[00:01:22] But what doesn't have as much variation is how they choose to set sail on their journey.

[00:01:29] Depending on how they've lived up until that breaking point comes,

[00:01:32] many people will find one of two routes to be the best course of action.

[00:01:37] Discipline and living in the moment.

[00:01:40] Or commitment and experimentation, if it sits better with you.

[00:01:44] These two concepts are in direct contrast to one another.

[00:01:48] So much so that the failure of one is likely to lead to faith in the other.

[00:01:53] In spite of that, however, oftentimes they are the key ingredients within many people's plans to better themselves.

[00:02:00] So let's try to break them down a little further, see what's really working, and maybe they can become friends by the end of this.

[00:02:08] On one hand, you have the narrative you'll hear predominantly from hippies and self-proclaimed artistic types.

[00:02:15] My life has no structure, and living too freely has taken me away from things I wanted to do that is too late for now.

[00:02:24] This, of course, is a major generalization, which I try to avoid, but hey, it's a Friday.

[00:02:28] For those that at least a sliver of this idea does apply to, however,

[00:02:33] it's tempting to pack up your free-spirited lifestyle and take charge by creating a disciplined set of goals for yourself

[00:02:40] that are sure to get your life on track.

[00:02:43] After all, discipline can force you out of bad habits.

[00:02:47] It allows steady growth.

[00:02:48] If you're keeping track of it, which you soldiers probably are,

[00:02:52] then it's easy to view concrete progress.

[00:02:55] Now, on the other hand, you have the business-y types,

[00:02:58] who have dutifully followed the proper rules and steps their whole lives and are now thinking to themselves,

[00:03:04] well, I'm here now, and it's not what I thought it would be.

[00:03:07] I've powered through the path I needed to, and now I'm living a life I don't really want.

[00:03:13] Again, generalization, but again, Friday.

[00:03:17] If this sounds like you, though,

[00:03:18] the urge to throw it all away and start doing things for you

[00:03:22] and blindly follow your gut from moment to moment with no shred of a plan

[00:03:26] may be what's kicking in.

[00:03:28] After all, living in the moment eliminates a lot of obligations.

[00:03:32] It allows each day to be something new.

[00:03:35] It's a surefire way to get a glimpse of who you really are.

[00:03:39] Here's what they aren't telling you, though,

[00:03:41] even though I just sort of alluded to it.

[00:03:43] The progress provided by a regimented lifestyle will become stifling

[00:03:48] if it's all about growth and not about enjoyment.

[00:03:52] And living in the moment has the potential to quickly turn into a midlife crisis,

[00:03:56] pointing you towards what you want right now,

[00:03:59] which, depending on how suppressed you feel,

[00:04:01] could very well be different from what you truly value in life,

[00:04:05] and therefore is more about just making up for the lost time.

[00:04:10] Clearly, time has shown that, like anything,

[00:04:13] the proper side to take is relative to you as an individual

[00:04:17] and how you thrive.

[00:04:19] If you know your goal,

[00:04:20] it can be found by taking deliberate steps and staying disciplined.

[00:04:24] Reasonably living in the moment, however,

[00:04:27] can help you find what it is you want,

[00:04:29] which, for many people, is always altering,

[00:04:32] if not changing completely.

[00:04:34] And that's precisely what most people are forgetting

[00:04:36] to take into consideration,

[00:04:38] the need for change and variation.

[00:04:40] We are not conditioned for too much routine,

[00:04:43] regardless of how many people are falling victim to it.

[00:04:47] We need to feel as though we're making some progress

[00:04:49] in retaining as much uncertainty in our lives

[00:04:52] as we are certainty.

[00:04:53] And as we become increasingly aware of that which is out there in the world,

[00:04:58] this hunger only intensifies.

[00:05:01] You might say,

[00:05:02] but Greg, isn't this need for variation honored by living in the moment?

[00:05:06] It is, but again,

[00:05:08] too much of anything can become cyclical,

[00:05:11] and that includes the lack of a cycle.

[00:05:14] So as always,

[00:05:15] I'm going to preach subjectively

[00:05:17] and say that real variation lies in drawing from both.

[00:05:21] I sometimes feel like I'm b***ing out

[00:05:23] when I resort to the gray area,

[00:05:25] but it's too important and I'm sticking to it,

[00:05:27] so how can we integrate the two?

[00:05:30] Because I believe in both.

[00:05:31] All right, well, let's start from the foundation.

[00:05:34] One thing to always remember is that

[00:05:36] if you're in distress or seeking some kind of change,

[00:05:39] it's a result of the fact that

[00:05:40] at least a portion of your core values is not being met.

[00:05:44] Whether it's you that's strayed from

[00:05:47] or someone or something else that has interfered

[00:05:50] with that which you believe is important,

[00:05:52] your needs are not being met.

[00:05:54] So the beginning of progress is to get serious

[00:05:57] and get specific about what your values are

[00:05:59] and what you really believe in at the deepest level.

[00:06:03] Now take a look at how you're spending your time.

[00:06:05] I've said this before,

[00:06:07] but track how you're spending your days

[00:06:09] and what you're doing.

[00:06:10] This could go on for a week or a month at a time maybe.

[00:06:14] After you've honestly assessed both what you believe in

[00:06:17] and what you're doing, bridge the gap.

[00:06:19] Ask yourself, do my actions really reflect

[00:06:23] what I believe at my core

[00:06:24] or what I'm tempted to act on right now?

[00:06:27] So presumably it's at least a little bit up.

[00:06:31] So reset and refocus on what you really want.

[00:06:34] Write up some steps as to how you think that life can be found

[00:06:37] while still being mindful

[00:06:39] of how you're currently spending your time.

[00:06:42] By the way, for those who are still in the dark

[00:06:44] about the job of a life coach,

[00:06:46] this kind of thing is exactly what we're trained to do,

[00:06:48] but I digress.

[00:06:50] The next time your week or month increment starts,

[00:06:53] keep a tally of both those natural habits

[00:06:55] and those habits you want to integrate.

[00:06:58] Start to set goals for yourself.

[00:07:00] I wanna bring this down to five times a month,

[00:07:02] but increase this to 10 times a month or whatever.

[00:07:05] This allows you to both have a schedule

[00:07:08] and stay disciplined,

[00:07:09] but between your week or a month time slots,

[00:07:12] assess how you're feeling.

[00:07:14] You can live in the moment by eliminating things

[00:07:16] that you no longer find useful

[00:07:18] while staying disciplined by acting upon the things

[00:07:21] that you do find useful.

[00:07:23] I, for example, do this very process.

[00:07:26] One time in an effort to lessen anxiety

[00:07:28] and keep my thoughts on track,

[00:07:30] I added journaling into my list of monthly goals.

[00:07:33] I didn't feel married to it, however,

[00:07:35] so when the time to journal came up,

[00:07:37] most of the time I decided I didn't feel like doing it.

[00:07:40] Quite simply, that taught me that I don't journal.

[00:07:44] Sounds nice, works for a lot of people,

[00:07:47] but it's not for me, so I don't journal.

[00:07:49] The next month, I added something else in its place

[00:07:52] that I felt might be useful.

[00:07:54] In doing so, I honored my desire in each moment,

[00:07:57] but also stayed disciplined to my journey

[00:08:00] by experimenting with a substitute action.

[00:08:03] I checked in with myself and altered my approach

[00:08:06] rather than blindly sticking to something

[00:08:08] I knew wasn't for me,

[00:08:10] even though I know how useful it can be for many others.

[00:08:14] You can do the same.

[00:08:16] Get as close as you can to narrowing down

[00:08:18] what you're about and what you want.

[00:08:21] Make a plan towards that,

[00:08:22] but be loose enough to flow with those momentary feelings

[00:08:26] while not completely being ruled by them.

[00:08:29] Disciplinarians may at first find the looseness

[00:08:32] to be counterproductive,

[00:08:33] and free spirits may at first find

[00:08:35] the deliberate course of action to be counterproductive,

[00:08:37] but with practice, the balance is more than attainable,

[00:08:42] and you can take charge of your life.

[00:08:49] You just listened to the post titled

[00:08:51] Staying Disciplined Versus Living in the Moment

[00:08:54] by Greg Audino at gregelsaudino on medium.com,

[00:08:59] and I'll be right back with my commentary.

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[00:10:08] Thank you to Greg,

[00:10:09] our host of Optimal Relationships Daily,

[00:10:11] and Good Sleep,

[00:10:12] our sleep affirmations podcast.

[00:10:14] When I started this show in 2015,

[00:10:17] I was pretty rigid about it.

[00:10:19] I committed to releasing an episode every single day,

[00:10:22] no matter what.

[00:10:24] Even if I was sick,

[00:10:25] I'd still record the intro and outro from my bed.

[00:10:28] That discipline helped get the podcast off the ground,

[00:10:32] but looking back,

[00:10:33] maybe it was a bit extreme.

[00:10:34] But then on the flip side,

[00:10:36] I've also had periods

[00:10:36] where I was probably too flexible,

[00:10:39] like with exercise.

[00:10:40] I used to try these intense workout programs

[00:10:43] thinking I needed that kind of structure,

[00:10:45] but they never stuck.

[00:10:46] Now I do Tai Chi a couple times a week,

[00:10:49] and I walk there when I can.

[00:10:51] Sometimes I do rowing,

[00:10:52] basically what feels right for me in the moment

[00:10:55] while still having some consistency.

[00:10:57] It's that balance Greg was talking about.

[00:10:59] So I think the key takeaway here

[00:11:01] is that it's not about choosing

[00:11:02] between being totally structured

[00:11:04] or completely free flowing.

[00:11:06] It's about finding that middle path

[00:11:07] that works for you.

[00:11:09] Maybe that means having some more core daily habits,

[00:11:12] but being flexible about how and when you do them.

[00:11:15] Really up to you.

[00:11:16] So if you're struggling with feeling too rigid

[00:11:18] or too scattered,

[00:11:20] maybe try experimenting with that balance.

[00:11:22] See what mix of structure and spontaneity

[00:11:25] feels right for you.

[00:11:26] And remember,

[00:11:28] there is no one-size-fits-all approach.

[00:11:30] We're all different.

[00:11:32] That's a good thing.

[00:11:34] Now with that,

[00:11:35] thank you for being here and listening.

[00:11:36] It means a lot.

[00:11:37] I couldn't keep going without you.

[00:11:39] Wishing you a great rest of your day

[00:11:41] and start to your weekend,

[00:11:42] and I'll see you tomorrow.

[00:11:44] Where your optimal life awaits.

[00:11:46] Where your optimal life awaits.