3564: Happiness and Satisfaction by Tynan on Success and Positive Mindset Shift

[00:00:00] Before we start, I want to share a super powerful practice I use called NSDR or Non-Sleep Deep Rest. In just about 10 minutes or so, this Yoga Nidra practice leaves you feeling as refreshed as after a nap without actually sleeping. Experience it for yourself on our guided podcast. Search NSDR and look for the one from Optimal Living Daily.

[00:00:22] This is Optimal Living Daily, Happiness and Satisfaction by Tynan of Tynan.com and I'm your narrator Justin Malik reading you blogs every single day of the year including holidays. And without further ado, let's get right to it as we optimize your life. Happiness and Satisfaction by Tynan of Tynan.com

[00:00:48] Seven years ago, I wrote a post called How to Be Happy Always. It's pretty poorly written but starts off with an important concept. We live in a society where happiness is the number one priority. Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. No one really questions that but maybe we should. Is happiness really the best goal we can come up with?

[00:01:11] In the time that's elapsed between when I wrote that post and now, I've thought a lot about happiness and I still think that maximizing it is a bad idea. But before I get into that, let's talk a little bit about what happiness is. Happiness is a good state of mind. It allows you to be optimistic, to see the good in people, and to be productive. On the other end of the spectrum, when you're very unhappy, you have a lot of barriers between things like productivity and socialization.

[00:01:40] Clearly, being happy is much better than being unhappy. It's important to be happy. Is there such a thing as being too happy? I don't think so. I've never seen someone make a mistake because he was just too happy. So what's my problem with maximizing happiness then? Well, it's the method mostly. The problem with the maximization of happiness is that it comes at a cost. If you're maximizing for happiness, you're taking focus away from other goals.

[00:02:07] I see happiness much like I see eating. If you don't have enough food, you are not going to get the most out of life, and you're not going to give the most to the world that you could either. You'll be in survival mode. If you don't have enough happiness, the same is true. But on the other hand, after a certain point of getting optimal nutrition, additional food you eat doesn't really do much good. People who dedicate their lives to enjoying food have always been a bit of a mystery to me.

[00:02:33] Is it really so important that fancy food passes through your digestive tract before you die? Sebastian Marshall has a really good quote on this same concept applied to happiness. Quote, Happiness, like food, is an important part of life, but not the purpose of life. Just as you want to avoid being starving, you also want to avoid being unhappy.

[00:03:04] So what's the purpose of life? This isn't a universal one, but I found that a good one is to try to make the world a better place for humans. I like this purpose because it extends past my lifetime, and because if that was everyone's purpose in life, the world would advance faster. On the other hand, your personal happiness dies with you. And I'm not sure that everyone optimizing for personal happiness would really be a good thing for the world. The interesting thing about happiness is that it can be 100% self-generated.

[00:03:33] We all agree, or at least parrot back, the axiom that money doesn't buy happiness. I'll extend that further and say that experiences don't buy happiness. This makes logical sense if you think about it. When I went through the ghettos of Haiti, the poorest country in this hemisphere, I met a lot of genuinely happy people. They don't have running water, don't have electricity most of the time, and many never leave their city, let alone their country. They're happy.

[00:03:59] On the other hand, we all know rich people who travel the world and enjoy the finest things in life, yet are still miserable. What buys happiness? Gratitude. When something good happens to you, you're grateful for it. When something bad happens to you, you're grateful for the challenge, and you're able to see the silver lining. When nothing happens to you, you're grateful to be alive. Cultivating this attitude takes a few months of practice. Just think of a good aspect to anything bad that happens to you.

[00:04:27] When you go through it, you will never be unhappy again. I'm not saying this will definitely work for everyone, but I am saying that I've recommended it to a lot of people, and everyone who actually follows through becomes happy all the time. Are there other ways to become happy? Sure, do drugs. Happiness is just a combination of chemicals in your brain, and drugs can certainly get them there. But that sort of happiness is fleeting. Or you can have a really fun experience, but that happiness leaves too. You can drive happiness from the people around you,

[00:04:57] but even that is a fickle happiness. The only happiness that is permanent and immobile is happiness that you generate yourself. When you install within yourself this permanent happiness, you have no desire for stimulation to make you happy. You know that you'll be happy no matter what. You stop chasing superficial things, but you still enjoy them when they cross your path. This happiness enables you to be truly independent, widening your range of possible activities

[00:05:25] to include things that don't involve stimulation. So if you're always happy, why do anything? Well, if you want to make an impact on the world, you need to understand it at a visceral level. That means experiencing great things and experiencing difficult things. Breath of experience is an incredibly valuable asset. Don't travel because you think it'll make you happy. Travel because the range of experiences you'll gain through it will help you understand the world and thus put you in a better position to do something good for it.

[00:05:54] Have people in your life not to make you happy, but to collaborate and learn together, to see different perspectives and to experience the range of human emotions. Choose your pursuits with the aim to either gain perspective on the world or to positively impact it. There's an ebb and flow to the process where you spend time absorbing the world and then you spend time putting that experience to work and producing. Throughout both of these phases, be happy. When you're experiencing the world, feel the joy in the high points

[00:06:24] and appreciate the struggle in the low points. When you're producing, take pleasure in your successes and be thankful for the challenges you face. Be happy all the time. Happiness is something to maintain and enjoy, but satisfaction is something to strive for. Happiness is simply a mixture of chemicals, but satisfaction comes only through positive action. I'd define satisfaction as a feeling of well-being derived through setting worthy goals and reaching them.

[00:06:52] Satisfaction isn't ephemeral like happiness because the achievement of goals isn't something that fades away. It also can't be tricked. You can't feel satisfaction through drugs or stimulation or even through positive thoughts. Satisfaction is a good indicator of your execution and is a carrot that pulls you towards doing good things. The actual feeling of satisfaction isn't that important, although it does feel good, but the pursuit of it would drive your life in a good direction.

[00:07:19] Life, liberty, and the pursuit of satisfaction. Sounds pretty good to me. Ironically, I'm posting this from a resort in Mexico that is basically built to promote happiness. You just listened to the post titled Happiness and Satisfaction by Tynan of Tynan.com. And I'll be right back with my commentary. Remember those childhood dreams? As we grow, our aspirations evolve. Instead of fantasizing about space travel,

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[00:08:47] Go to shopify.com slash OLD. Shopify.com slash old. Thank you to Tynan. This podcast is about happiness, among other things like minimalism, productivity, and so on. But I think we should be careful about getting caught in the trap of pursuing happiness being our main goal in life. We might have always thought that happiness is the ultimate objective. That's definitely what I used to think.

[00:09:16] But he makes a good argument for why that might be too narrow of a focus. The food comparison was a good one, I think. Too much of anything can backfire. That's probably one of the biggest lessons from thousands of episodes of this podcast. Even seemingly amazing things. Too much of it, and our utility or our value, starts to go negative. Let me know what you think. I always enjoy hearing your perspective on these bigger life questions.

[00:09:43] You can get in touch at oldpodcast.com. But I'll leave it there for today. Thank you for being here. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll catch you tomorrow, where your optimal life awaits.