3565: Make Better Decisions by Only Making them Once AND Feeding the “Good Wolf” Inside of Us by Jay Harrington

[00:00:00] Before we start, please check out our new podcast, Good Sleep. Have you ever noticed how a calm mind can really set the stage for a good night's sleep? That's the idea behind our new podcast, Good Sleep. Greg, our host from Optimal Relationships Daily, is here to help ease you into a peaceful night's rest with some positive affirmations. And these affirmations aren't just comforting, they can help ease anxiety and nurture positive thoughts, setting you up for true good sleep.

[00:00:25] So press play on Good Sleep tonight because a good tomorrow starts with a good night's sleep. Just search for Good Sleep in your podcast app and be sure to pick the one from Optimal Living Daily. This is Optimal Living Daily. Make better decisions by only making them once AND Feeding the Good Wolf Inside of Us. Built by Jay Harrington of LifeAndWim.com

[00:00:50] Hello, old friend. I'm your narrator, Justin Malik, reading you blogs every single day of the year to help you live a more meaningful life. There are no interviews on this show, so not really a typical podcast. Just me narrating some amazing articles. I have two posts for you today, actually, both from Jay Harrington. So let's get right to them as we optimize your life.

[00:01:14] Make better decisions by only making them once by Jay Harrington of LifeAndWim.com Most mornings, I'm a model of productivity. I get up early, make coffee, and I'm typically at my computer by 5.30 a.m. I get important work done, make a to-do list for my day, and fit a workout in before my kids get up. I eat a healthy breakfast, get the kids off to school, and then it's back to work.

[00:01:42] In other words, I have a good morning routine. However, by the time the sun sets, things typically start unraveling. By the time the kids get to bed, I'm usually exhausted and default to beer and Netflix. Often I complete the gluttonous trifecta with a salty snack. It's pretty obvious my evening routine, if you want to call it that, is lacking. Of course, I'm not alone in making suboptimal decisions, especially late in the day.

[00:02:10] And that's largely the result of having to make so many decisions throughout the day. For example, one study found that we make an average of 217 food-related decisions alone in a single day. Is it any surprise then that I'm reaching for chips instead of an apple at night? Every decision we make throughout a day progressively depletes our ability to make good decisions. This is called decision fatigue. We run short on mental energy.

[00:02:39] The more decisions we make throughout the day, the harder each one becomes for our brains. We start defaulting to easy, comfortable choices, which helps explain why my morning routine is solid, but my evening one is lacking. One and done decisions. The antidote to decision fatigue? Make a decision once, so you never have to make it again. Here's a small example of how one and done decision making works.

[00:03:07] In October, I decided to post content on LinkedIn every day. LinkedIn is the most important platform for our marketing agency to develop new business, so it's important for me to be visible to our audience there. Had I decided to post on LinkedIn more often or three times a week? Every day I would have been confronted with the decision of whether or not to post. That would have made it easy to decide that tomorrow would be better, or that I didn't have anything interesting to say.

[00:03:36] By making the decision once, I didn't have to grapple with it every day. I don't have to rely on willpower. I just do it habitually. It's automatic. Undoubtedly, there are people who have greater willpower and discipline than I do, for whom a one-and-done approach isn't necessary. But for me, and perhaps for you too, if I leave the door open even a crack, I'll find a way to make an exception despite my best intentions. It's far easier for me to shut the door completely

[00:04:05] so that I leave no choice but to take some beneficial action. I remove the variable of my fatigued decision-making. This principle can be applied to things big and small in life, from exercise and investing to snacking and website browsing. Here's how. Examine what decisions you routinely wrestle with, systematize as many of them as possible by making one big decision, not many little ones,

[00:04:33] and continue looking for ways to simplify your life to the point where the decisions you do have to make relate to things you really care about. Nobody is perfect. Willpower rises and falls. There's no way to get around the fact that decision fatigue will result in Netflix binges and one too many beers. But it's possible to take small, positive steps forward by taking more decisions off the table. One-and-done is an approach that can help you make fewer decisions

[00:05:02] and therefore make those decisions better. Feeding the Good Wolf Inside of Us by Jay Harrington of LifeAndWim.com You may have heard the parable about the old Cherokee who is teaching his grandson about life. A fight is going on inside me, he said to the boy. It's a terrible fight and it's between two wolves. One is evil.

[00:05:29] He is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego. He went on, The other is good. He's joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

[00:05:59] The same fight is going on inside you and inside every other person too. The grandson considered this and then asked his grandfather, Which wolf will win? The old Cherokee replied, The one you feed. To feed a wolf is to bless it with our attention, to give it energy, to allow it to dominate our thoughts and narrative. The evil wolf reflects scarcity thinking. The good wolf, an abundance mindset.

[00:06:28] David Foster Wallace warned in not so many words of the dangers of the evil wolf in a commencement speech at Kenyon College. He described one of life's greatest challenges as resisting one's default setting. Quote, To keep from going through your comfortable, prosperous, respectable adult life, dead unconscious, a slave to your head and to your natural default setting of being uniquely, completely, imperially alone, day in and day out. End quote.

[00:06:58] The good wolf alternative, as Wallace describes it, is, quote, Being conscious and aware enough to choose what you pay attention to and to choose how you construct meaning from experience. End quote. Choosing what to pay attention to sounds simple, but is devilishly hard. The evil wolf looms large in the regrets of the past and the anxieties of the future. The good wolf flourishes in the present moment. Success, happiness,

[00:07:27] contentment, joy, accomplishment, all of these things hinge on one's ability to tame the mind, to be conscious and aware, to make our minds our servants, not our masters. That's easier said than done at a time when our attention is being sold to the highest bidder. Taking back control is possible, but requires unplugging from the grid that feeds our worst instincts. A pattern interrupting walk outside in the fresh, cold air can do wonders

[00:07:57] for mental health. A new book can inspire a new way of thinking. A conversation with an old friend can break the spell. Limiting beliefs and negative self-talk can stop us from living purposeful, intentional, happy lives. Abundant thinking and positive narratives can set us free. It's our choice. We get what we feed. You just listened to the posts titled

[00:08:26] Making Better Decisions by Only Making Them Once and Feeding the Good Wolf Inside of Us both by Jay Harrington of lifeandwim.com and I'll be right back with my commentary. Remember those childhood dreams? As we grow, our aspirations evolve. Instead of fantasizing about space travel, perhaps you're now dreaming of launching your own business around your passion for minimalism or sustainable living. But doubt creeps in. Do I have the skills? Can I build a website? How will I find customers? Enter Shopify.

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[00:09:27] their award-winning support team is available 24-7. Turn those dreams into and give them the best shot at success with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com slash old. Go to shopify.com slash O-L-D shopify.com slash old. Thank you to Jay. I'm a big fan of making one-time decisions. That's how I am about breakfast

[00:09:56] 99% of the time and even lunch and dinner about half the time. It's why Steve Jobs chose to wear the same outfit every day. And decision fatigue is why grocery stores pack more items in the checkout line and online stores do this as well. You've already made so many decisions it's difficult to make the right one towards the end of that trip. The quality of our decisions seems to deteriorate the more decisions we make. And as for the second post, I think this goes well

[00:10:25] with the idea of chasing happiness too. That constantly chasing it might be putting our energy into the wrong place. If we're constantly chasing happiness, doesn't that imply that we need it? That we aren't happy enough? It could be argued that that's the bad wolf saying we aren't happy. That we need more happiness. That something is wrong with us. Instead, if we feed the good wolf by doing things like taking care of ourselves, being kind to others, spending time outside,

[00:10:55] just good things, maybe that happiness we're looking for will be the byproduct. So maybe today we can feed that good wolf and or make a good decision and try sticking to it. Thank you for being here and thank you to Jay for the posts. Wishing you a wonderful day and I'll see you tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.