3603: Valuable Things AND Can't Live Without by Colin Wright of Exile Lifestyle on Minimalism and A Simple Life

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[00:00:45] [SPEAKER_00] It's a Minimalist Monday edition of Optimal Living Daily. Valuable Things and Can't Live Without. Both by Colin Wright of ExileLifestyle.com and I'm Justin Malek, your narrator. I read to you from some of the best blogs in the world every day covering personal development and growth, lifestyle, minimalism, and more. I have two posts today, both from Colin Wright, so let's get right to them and continue optimizing your life.

[00:01:16] [SPEAKER_00] Valuable Things by Colin Wright of ExileLifestyle.com Possessions can make us happier, but only if we own the right things. I should note that this doesn't mean possessions are a replacement for experiences and relationships and a rich internal life. Most ideally, the things we own are mere additions to a fulfilled existence. They add spice to something that's already satisfying and satiating.

[00:01:43] [SPEAKER_00] But all too often, the things we bring into our lives become anchors instead of wings. They don't psych our thirst, they just make us more parched. That can result in a spiral of consumption that for many, lasts their entire lives. It's important to question one's own feelings about things because there is a consistent, low-level manipulation happening around us at all times.

[00:02:07] [SPEAKER_00] Like having just a little more oxygen in the air than usual, it's unlikely that we'd notice the addition, yet it can still influence our behavior, adjust our priorities, and even hijack our rationality. Many of us don't have experience doing the math that might help us ascertain what a thing is actually worth to us. Is this thing I'm thinking about buying a subjectively valuable thing? Will it fulfill my needs, my wants, my priorities?

[00:02:35] [SPEAKER_00] Will it help me get where I want to be? Will the price I pay for it be a good investment? Will I net more than $500 of value from a $500 television? How much more? And what other costs, monetary and otherwise, are associated with owning such a thing? I find that working through these figures helps pour cold water on the riled-up reflexes that can flare during holiday seasons and sales.

[00:03:02] [SPEAKER_00] Clever marketing elevates the tempo on our internal must-consume chemical cocktails, and getting really specific, truly granular about how I intend to use something and what specific value I'll derive from it helps me maintain a semblance of rationality, even when something is really cool and available at a deep discount. Will I use this nifty device all the time?

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_00] Will that use justify its costs and the space it occupies in my life and in my home? Is there some other way to achieve the same end without accruing a new possession? Is there some other way I'd rather be spending this money? Will I feel better knowing this money is there in the bank, available at need in the future? Or will I feel better knowing I've spent it, the money lost to me forever, on this thing?

[00:03:52] [SPEAKER_00] We can make use of the systems that are out there, the same ones that try to manipulate us and which compel us to consume, but we can only do so if we know what we want, why we want it, and what it's worth to us. If we don't have an understanding of ourselves and our hopes, needs, priorities, and yes, financial realities, then we can't hope to consume intentionally, to buy assets, rather than just more stuff.

[00:04:25] [SPEAKER_00] Can't live without by Colin Wright of exilelifestyle.com. If you had to make a list of things you couldn't live without, what would be on it? What people, possessions, ideas, foods are so important that without them, you would not, could not, wouldn't even want to go on. I aspire to keep my list empty. Not because I'm a hateful person or vacant of joy, but rather because I prefer to internalize my happiness.

[00:04:54] [SPEAKER_00] I don't want it to be dependent on anything outside of me or outside of my control. Consider that you can have a life rich with amazing friends and family, foods and experiences, possessions and creations, and not lean on any of them. Meaning that if they were to disappear, you wouldn't be crushed. You'd be truly saddened by the loss of a loved one, obviously,

[00:05:20] [SPEAKER_00] and the destruction or loss of a phone or other gadget tends to put a pall over an otherwise wonderful night. But to not be able to live without something goes a step further than that. It implies that you are defined by these people, these activities, these things. There's such a part of you that were they to disappear, so would you. That's not healthy. It's not stable. It's not something worth striving for, these entanglements with entities and objects outside your person.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_00] People can leave, that's their right. Objects can be stolen or destroyed because such is the nature of objects. If you can find your happiness internally, your satisfaction with life derived from how you experience the world, not in the experiences themselves, then your quality of life is determined by you, not some external factor. Don't shut out the world around you, but don't depend on it either.

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_00] Trust that you have everything you need to be happy already, and the myriad influences around you only add to that. You can enjoy the world more freely, in fact, knowing that you needn't always be on guard against your wonderful thing disappearing and leaving you with nothing. Because there is no nothing. Even in an empty room, you've always got you. Make sure you're excellent company.

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[00:08:59] [SPEAKER_00] That's P-E-S-T-I-E dot com slash OLD for an extra 10% off. Thank you to Colin. He has an update to the second post. I'll read that for you right now. Update April 16th, 2017. This is a foundational concept to a lot of what I write about, and it does sound pretty cold when you're first exposed to it.

[00:09:23] [SPEAKER_00] But the idea isn't to empty your life of meaningful things, but rather to ensure that things in which you imbue meaning are valuable additions to your life, not foundational requirements. If you can ensure that you are all you need at the base level of your needs pyramid, then you're good to go, whatever you might want to stack atop it. Infrastructurally, you're in good shape. So thank you to Colin. I think there's a big distinction there.

[00:09:52] [SPEAKER_00] He's not saying we shouldn't enjoy things or people, but instead we shouldn't make our happiness dependent on them. But I think there's a balance. I agree, we shouldn't be so attached to things that we feel like we can't live without them. But on the other hand, I do think it's natural and human to form meaningful attachments to people and even certain possessions that have maybe sentimental value. Maybe the key is recognizing the difference between healthy attachment and unhealthy dependence.

[00:10:21] [SPEAKER_00] So something to think about today for Minimalist Monday. Thank you for being here every day and thinking about this stuff along with me. Have a great rest of your day and I'll see you tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.