4135: The Only Remedy for FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) by Courtney Carver on Mindfulness

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[00:01:04] [SPEAKER_01] This is Optimal Living Daily. The only remedy for FOMO, the fear of missing out by Courtney Carver of BeMoreWithLess.com and I'm Justin Malik. And I'm gonna jump right into today's post as we optimize your life. The only remedy for FOMO, the fear of missing out by Courtney Carver of BeMoreWithLess.com.

[00:01:29] [SPEAKER_01] FOMO is the acronym for the fear of missing out and isn't just something that's fun to say, it's real. We're struggling with the fear of missing out on activities, information, opportunities, connection, and many other things. We struggle to keep up, to catch up, to be included, noticed, and loved all in the name of FOMO. You may have FOMO if you're doing any of the following.

[00:01:55] [SPEAKER_01] Saying yes when your heart says no, scrolling endlessly through Facebook and other social media feeds, constantly checking your phone, sleeping less, compromising self-care practices, rushing, choosing convenience over quality, wasting time feeling bad about what you missed, or being exhausted for attempting to do it all. The only remedy for FOMO is to be present.

[00:02:21] [SPEAKER_01] When you're truly present, there is no regret for the past or fear of the future. When you're present, you notice everything and everyone around you. The big picture, the little pictures, and all the tiny details that contribute to the moments which make up the here and now, which make up your life. And that's just what happens on the outside. Your body, heart, and soul change on the inside too when you give yourself permission to be fully alive and aware, to show up for your life.

[00:02:50] [SPEAKER_01] That's presence. Five ways to stay present and eliminate FOMO. Number one, stop acting like everything is an emergency. If you're living and or working in a reactionary state or under stressful conditions, you might be used to treating everything like an emergency. It's not. Instead, choose to underreact. Respond thoughtfully. Leave the drama and stress out of it.

[00:03:18] [SPEAKER_01] The simple act of giving yourself room to breathe will bring you into the present. From there, you can make your decisions based on fact, not fear. Number two, turn off your devices. We say we keep our devices on in case someone needs to reach us or in case there's an emergency. And then we make everything an emergency. See number one. When our minds are on our phone notifications in the anticipation of new information coming across our devices, we simply cannot be present.

[00:03:47] [SPEAKER_01] We're scattered, distracted, and completely unaware of what matters now. It's then that we ignore the people we love most, make crazy decisions, and feel stressed when we should feel peace. Find a way to make your devices add value to your life by setting limits. Experiment. Set limits and create your own experiment. Instead of checking all day long, schedule two intentional sessions with your digital device a day or less.

[00:04:17] [SPEAKER_01] The distraction of a check-in is not nearly as damaging as the time lost trying to come back to what you were doing. That recovery takes more time than you think, about 23 minutes, to be present again. Number three, say, yeah. Derek Sivers' approach to feeling like you're doing too much is this. Quote, Those of you who often overcommit or feel too scattered may appreciate a new philosophy I'm trying.

[00:04:44] [SPEAKER_01] If I'm not saying, yeah, about something, then say no. Meaning, when deciding whether to commit to something, if I feel anything less than, wow, that would be amazing, absolutely, yeah, then my answer is no. When you say no to most things, you leave room in your life to really throw yourself completely into that rare thing that makes you say, yeah, we're all busy. We've all taken on too much.

[00:05:11] [SPEAKER_01] Saying yes to less is the way out. End quote. Good stuff, right? Number four, bring recess back. Remember recess? It was that free time after lunch at school. It was a time to play. When you were a little kid and went out to play, you didn't worry about tomorrow or yesterday. You didn't care about how you looked or what people thought of you. Instead, you jumped in the puddles, rolled down the hill, and laughed until you cried.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_01] If you want to be present, fold up your to-do list and go play. Take a walk, sing a song, paint a mural, hike up a mountain, or go jump in a puddle. Bring recess back and play your way. And number five, choose deep versus wide. Would you rather have just a taste of a hundred things on your bucket list to say you accomplished them, or the opportunity to savor a few?

[00:06:07] [SPEAKER_01] Give in to FOMO, go wide and take a taste, have a little bit of everything, or choose a deep, meaningful dive into something you care about. Choose a life-changing experience. Choose true love. Choose magic. Be more with less. FOMO signals a lack of engagement. If you're worried about what you're missing, you cannot be present. Letting go of FOMO means abandoning the need to catch up, keep up, and measure up

[00:06:37] [SPEAKER_01] in exchange for a chance to connect and engage with what or who is right in front of you. Experiment with these recommendations to stay present in your life and turn your FOMO into JOMO, the joy of missing out. Feel joy that you have a choice, joy that you're protecting what matters most, and joy that you are present because you are finally living.

[00:07:07] [SPEAKER_01] You just listened to the post titled, The Only Remedy for FOMO, The Fear of Missing Out, by Courtney Carver of BeMoreWithLess.com. And I'll be right back with my commentary. Support for today's episode comes from Square, the business platform that helps sellers become neighborhood favorites. Payments, point of sale, online orders, inventory, staff, all in one place. So you can focus on your customers instead of your to-do list. One thing about my favorite gelato place, besides the flavors,

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[00:08:03] [SPEAKER_01] Right now, listeners can get up to $200 off Square hardware when you sign up at square.com slash go slash old. That's S-Q-U-A-R-E dot com slash go slash O-L-D. Get started with Square and build a setup that works the way you do. Back to school starts now. Get long-lasting battery life on the Dell XPS laptop powered by Series 3 Intel Core so you can work from anywhere.

[00:08:32] [SPEAKER_01] Now starting at $699 with exclusive student pricing starting at $599. Complete your setup with savings on select monitors and must-have electronics and accessories. Limited time deals and free shipping on PCs and more await you at dell.com slash deals. That's dell.com slash deals. Thank you to Courtney for the posts. One thing that hit home for me is the first tip

[00:09:02] [SPEAKER_01] that was stop acting like everything is an emergency. Now I'm generally a very laid-back person, and you might be too, but this could still be relevant because an email might come in and while again I'm laid-back and go with the flow, I might fear that I'll miss a very important email or text or some other notification if I'm not within arm's reach of my phone. I think a little time here could go a long way,

[00:09:29] [SPEAKER_01] both in terms of time seeing the email in the first place, but also after reading the email and before responding, because then there's a little bit more processing, thinking, and settling time, which is important. There's a quote in there from Derek Sivers, and it's funny to me because that quote is from an article that I narrated a very, very long time ago, all the way back in episode 44, in fact.

[00:09:56] [SPEAKER_01] I don't love referencing episodes that old usually because I cringe a bit when I hear the sound of it. It's changed a lot since then, but I guess that's okay. I just might cringe at this in seven more years, who knows, but yeah, if you wanna hear that full article by Derek Sivers, I did narrate that in a special episode. That was episode number 44. But I'll leave it there for today. Thank you for listening. Have a great rest of your day, and I'll see you tomorrow where your optimal life awaits.