2913: Friendships: the Spice That Make Everything Nice by Ellen Burgan of If It Brings You Joy on Making Time For Friends

[00:00:00] [SPEAKER_00]: Hey, you, with the podcast, you're here.

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[00:00:30] [SPEAKER_01]: This is Optimal Living Daily Episode 2913.

[00:00:34] [SPEAKER_01]: Friendships, the spice that makes everything nice by Ellen Bergen of if it brings you joy.com

[00:00:40] [SPEAKER_01]: and I'm just a molyc.

[00:00:42] [SPEAKER_01]: Welcome back to a Sunday bonus episode where I give you a little extra content from a podcast

[00:00:47] [SPEAKER_01]: in our network that I think will also help you live a life that's a bit more meaningful

[00:00:51] [SPEAKER_01]: and happier.

[00:00:52] [SPEAKER_01]: And this episode is coming from Optimal Relationship Staley.

[00:00:55] [SPEAKER_01]: So without further ado, here's Greg with another post as we optimize our life.

[00:01:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Friendships, the spice that makes everything nice by Ellen Bergen of if it brings you

[00:01:09] [SPEAKER_02]: joy.com.

[00:01:12] [SPEAKER_02]: As I fly home from an amazing long weekend with three life-long friends, it gives me time to reflect

[00:01:18] [SPEAKER_02]: on the joys of all types of friendships.

[00:01:21] [SPEAKER_02]: There's such joy in both new friendships and life-long friendships.

[00:01:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Some friends I don't see all that often.

[00:01:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Yet when we do get together, it seems like nothing changed between us.

[00:01:32] [SPEAKER_02]: Others I phone often but see seldom, yet we know each other inside and out.

[00:01:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Do you have these different types of friends in your life?

[00:01:39] [SPEAKER_02]: The local friends I'm about to see most often keep my fun factor going.

[00:01:44] [SPEAKER_02]: It's always fun to meet friends for an impromptu cup of coffee or cocktail, maybe dinner,

[00:01:49] [SPEAKER_02]: but definitely chatting and laughing.

[00:01:52] [SPEAKER_02]: Growing old long-term friends,

[00:01:54] [SPEAKER_02]: the inspiration for this post is a group of us friends who have survived the test of time.

[00:02:00] [SPEAKER_02]: Although I went to kindergarten with two of these ladies, our friendships really started around the junior high school years.

[00:02:06] [SPEAKER_02]: They all play a big role in my high school memories, the 80s were crazy and so were we.

[00:02:11] [SPEAKER_02]: We stood up in each other's weddings.

[00:02:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Eagually told and listened to kids' stories as our children were born and as they grew into adults themselves.

[00:02:19] [SPEAKER_02]: Supported each other through life struggles.

[00:02:21] [SPEAKER_02]: Celebrated successes and so much more.

[00:02:25] [SPEAKER_02]: Basically we've seen each other through good times and bad.

[00:02:28] [SPEAKER_02]: Knowing each other's roots gives us a bond that is acquired via nothing but years.

[00:02:33] [SPEAKER_02]: We know each other's parents and siblings from our childhood.

[00:02:36] [SPEAKER_02]: As adults, we know each other's spouses, children, and even dogs.

[00:02:41] [SPEAKER_02]: We know where each of us came from and what we each went through to get us where we are today.

[00:02:45] [SPEAKER_02]: Four decades later.

[00:02:47] [SPEAKER_02]: We've all changed throughout the years and have our differences,

[00:02:51] [SPEAKER_02]: but our roots are deep.

[00:02:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I think those roots help us understand each other and accept each other even with our

[00:02:57] [SPEAKER_02]: ideal synchroces.

[00:02:59] [SPEAKER_02]: We no longer live near each other but we still make it a priority to keep in touch.

[00:03:04] [SPEAKER_02]: And by keeping in touch, I don't just mean Facebook.

[00:03:06] [SPEAKER_02]: Sure, Facebook is a fun way for us to stay connected.

[00:03:09] [SPEAKER_02]: I especially love seeing their photos and we've reached the adult age where photos now

[00:03:14] [SPEAKER_02]: include grandchildren seems impossible, yet awesome.

[00:03:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Facebook would have been especially convenient during the busiest of years when we were in college,

[00:03:21] [SPEAKER_02]: raising children or building a career, but Mark Zuckerberg was only an elementary school at that time.

[00:03:27] [SPEAKER_02]: So although technology helps adult friends stay connected, seeing someone's face,

[00:03:32] [SPEAKER_02]: hearing their voice and giving them a hug is so much better.

[00:03:36] [SPEAKER_02]: Four of us lifelong friends just got together for a long weekend in Denver.

[00:03:40] [SPEAKER_02]: We don't get to see each other often,

[00:03:42] [SPEAKER_02]: but we easily pick up right where we left off a year or two ago.

[00:03:46] [SPEAKER_02]: We each have different personalities, but I think those roots I mentioned earlier help us be

[00:03:51] [SPEAKER_02]: at ease with each other.

[00:03:53] [SPEAKER_02]: I'm the quiet one, but no worries because there are a couple of talkers in the group.

[00:03:57] [SPEAKER_02]: There was a nice mix of exploring the Denver area and simply relaxing.

[00:04:01] [SPEAKER_02]: We talked and laughed and chopped endlessly.

[00:04:05] [SPEAKER_02]: Next summer will be our 35-year high school reunion,

[00:04:08] [SPEAKER_02]: so that's always a good reason to get together.

[00:04:10] [SPEAKER_02]: As empty nesters or close to it, we are already thinking about our next vacation together,

[00:04:16] [SPEAKER_02]: which may include our spouses, although they don't know it yet.

[00:04:19] [SPEAKER_02]: This group of ladies along with a few others that were not able to join us

[00:04:22] [SPEAKER_02]: are truly priceless gems in my life.

[00:04:26] [SPEAKER_02]: Time with friends is self-care.

[00:04:29] [SPEAKER_02]: When I return home after a fun lady's weekend, I feel like I'm a better person.

[00:04:34] [SPEAKER_02]: I took time to focus and reconnect with people who are part of my support system.

[00:04:38] [SPEAKER_02]: I took time for me.

[00:04:40] [SPEAKER_02]: I feel a little rejuvenated and ready to get back home to my hubby, my dogs, and routine.

[00:04:45] [SPEAKER_02]: If you're too busy for friends, you're too busy.

[00:04:48] [SPEAKER_02]: Life gets busy and it's really easy to let friendships fall by the wayside.

[00:04:53] [SPEAKER_02]: It takes some effort, but friendships make life good.

[00:04:56] [SPEAKER_02]: If life has gotten away from you and maybe you don't have the friendships that you'd like to have,

[00:05:01] [SPEAKER_02]: take action.

[00:05:03] [SPEAKER_02]: People move, jobs change, and a whole host of other things happen.

[00:05:06] [SPEAKER_02]: But that doesn't mean you need to lose touch.

[00:05:10] [SPEAKER_02]: Everyone is busy, but you can make time.

[00:05:13] [SPEAKER_02]: Come up with creative ways to make time for friends and then make it happen.

[00:05:17] [SPEAKER_02]: Whether it's taking a vacation together, scheduling a monthly phone call or anything in between,

[00:05:23] [SPEAKER_02]: just do it.

[00:05:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Reach out to an old friend or to someone new in your community.

[00:05:27] [SPEAKER_02]: Friends truly are the spice of life, and are important to your well-being and happiness.

[00:05:33] [SPEAKER_02]: Reach out to someone and make some fun happen.

[00:05:39] [SPEAKER_02]: You just listen to the post titled Friendships.

[00:05:43] [SPEAKER_02]: The spice that makes everything nice by Ellen Bergen of IfItBringZewjoy.com.

[00:05:49] [SPEAKER_02]: Friendships are so valuable.

[00:05:51] [SPEAKER_02]: The only relationship we have that is free of blood, free of contracts and the like.

[00:05:57] [SPEAKER_02]: It's so easy to continually choose our friendships over time and show up purely because we want to.

[00:06:03] [SPEAKER_02]: It's important to keep this in mind as a sense of freedom makes it so easy to be ourselves with our friends.

[00:06:11] [SPEAKER_02]: Which can often give us a sense of relaxation, a sense of openness, and serve as a good

[00:06:16] [SPEAKER_02]: recharge which can be tough to do within our other relationships that can not always but can

[00:06:21] [SPEAKER_02]: come with more expectations.

[00:06:24] [SPEAKER_02]: Keep your friends close, plan things with them, and continue to build those relationships.

[00:06:29] [SPEAKER_02]: As they often slowly but surely form the bedrock of our lives and outlast many other things that we

[00:06:35] [SPEAKER_02]: thought might stick around, but didn't.

[00:06:38] [SPEAKER_02]: As you can see I think very highly of friendships and was so happy to share a post highlighting

[00:06:42] [SPEAKER_02]: those often forgotten relationships. Thanks a lot for joining me today and to Ellen for sharing

[00:06:47] [SPEAKER_02]: some great material. We'll be back tomorrow in the Wednesday show so that don't miss out folks.

[00:06:52] [SPEAKER_02]: I will see you there with more informative material and how to better your relationships

[00:06:56] [SPEAKER_02]: and that's where you're up to my life awaits.