This post features comments from a thread in the OLD Podcast Facebook group.
We hear you when you share your struggles with our 7,000+ strong FB community. We hope this post is helpful to everyone who’s in the same boat!
Everyone knows the “high” from feeling motivated when you’ve set your mind on a goal.
However, none of us are superhuman — and we sometimes hit slumps or roadblocks which make us question if or when we’ll ever be able to pick ourselves up.
Sometimes, these obstacles are due to unexpected circumstances that we have little control over.
As bestselling author Mark Manson shares in Episode 1262:
“Emotions are not a choice. Behavior is.”
Listen to Justin narrate Mark’s article on Episode 1262 of Optimal Living Daily.
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Tough as the obstacles are, it’s what we do today that counts.
We’ve split the rest of this post into three parts. The first two sections summarize steps you can take to feel less stuck, while the third section gives more specific steps to some of the problems that members shared in our Facebook group.
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3 Things That Are Keeping You Stuck
Dr. Allison is a licensed clinical psychologist in the Chicago area.
She shares the three things that often hold us back:
- Feeling “ready.” Being “ready” makes us think we need to be 100% prepared, without any fears or doubts. While it’s important to think things through beforehand, Dr. Allison advises us to embrace feeling “ready enough.”
- Waiting for certainty. Uncertainty is part of the picture when it comes to big changes. Instead of being stuck because you don’t know what’s going to happen, be courageous and take a step forward anyway.
- Desiring a clear path. Dr. Allison says, “Life isn’t like a Google Map. You have to be willing to take wrong turns. You have to be willing to start the journey, even when you’re not sure what lies ahead.”
Taking things one step at a time and finding your own way are part of making your own way forward.
3 Things You Can Do Now To Become Less Stuck
Shir is a self-love advocate and podcast fan.
Here are her three steps to get out of a rut when you feel uninspired:
- Create space. You can create space in terms of time, mentally, or physically. Slowing down lets you reconnect with yourself. Having an open mind lets you see different perspectives. And keeping your living space decluttered helps you live a less cluttered life.
- Do something new. Seek out new content or switch up your weekly schedule. Doing something different might mean visiting a museum or listening to new music. Reaching out to others can be helpful too as other people’s experiences might be a source of support or inspiration.
- Take action anyway. Even a minimal step forward is a powerful one. Shir says, “You always have a choice to pick out a new, different thought for [a negative feeling].” Once you perform this small action, set out to complete the next minimal task to build momentum.
How Can I Apply These Tips to My Situation?
The following comments were posted by members in our FB group, on a thread about motivation and feeling stuck.
QUESTION #1: “I need some suggestions for workplace confidence. – N.M.”
ANSWER: Set small goals to build confidence. Create some mental space to shift your mindset so that you’re not always focused on “lacking confidence.” Take ownership for what you do so that you feel empowered by being responsible for your own thoughts, behavior, and actions.
If you identify as an introvert, read books and resources on how to harness your skills as an introvert. When you are more certain of your value and skills, your mentality and disposition are likely to be steadier and more positive. You can also check out resources on overcoming anxiety if it's something you struggle with.
QUESTION #2: “I’m struggling to find a way to combine work I don't like with two small kids. I hardly find any time for myself, which means almost zero physical activity and high levels of stress. – P.V.”
ANSWER: Balancing work and motherhood is one of the biggest modern day challenges.
In Episode 404 of Optimal Relationships Daily, Cara Harvey of A Purpose Driven Mom shares three easy steps to create a morning routine to get started on your day on a good note.
You could consider revamping your resume so that you can seek out a new job opportunity which offers work you enjoy. You might also want to check out work from home jobs for more flexibility with work life balance.
QUESTION #3: “I’m just getting out of a breakup and deciding how to best move on and heal. – A.E.”
ANSWER: In Episode 296 of Optimal Relationships Daily, Eddie Corbano talks about why being alone helps with healing after a bad breakup. He shares that feeling comfortable with being alone helped him to feel complete and “at home” with himself. There’s a difference between aloneness and loneliness, and it takes exercise and patience to feel comfortable by yourself. The upside is that it will improve your life and provide you stability.
In Episode 187, Eddie also shares some breakup mistakes that you must avoid. One of these mistakes is going on the rebound immediately. You need to take the time to work through your experience and learn what went wrong so that you make wiser choices in future.
QUESTION #4: “I need some help with motivation to continue onwards with my goals/projects. For example, I want to start a business but feel stuck on getting started. – B.O.”
ANSWER: In Episode 614 of Optimal Business Daily, Philip Taylor of PT Money shares five things to do before starting a business. Be sure you learn the fundamentals of your industry and test your idea before committing more time and money to your business.
Write down a small goal that you can accomplish within 24 hours to make positive steps forward with getting started.
And if you find yourself scrolling social media and dealing with feelings of fear or self-judgment from viewing accounts of successful entrepreneurs…stop! Remember that social media is a “highlight reel” and that endlessly comparing yourself to others is a surefire way to feel like you’ll never be “ready” to succeed.
QUESTION #5: “How do I build discipline in all aspects of life? I want to establish and keep good habits, exercising, meal prep, good time management.” – L.M.
ANSWER: Certified health coach Melani Schweder shares seven solid ways to make habits stick.
Stay tuned in June to listen to her blog post being narrated on Optimal Living Daily!
“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don't belong.” – Mandy Hale
Remember that it’s never too late to start fresh.
“People often start new goals for the New Year or with the change in season,” says Entrepreneur writer Nina Zipkin. “But you can have a fresh start whenever you want.”
Do you have tips or strategies on how to get out of a rut? Feel free to post a comment or ask a question in our Facebook Group!