Hello everybody, and welcome to episode 100 of Optimal Living Advice, the podcast where we take any questions you might have about the many struggles of life and get them answered for you here on the show.
I’m your host, certified life coach Greg Audino but I am taking the day off, people. Yes, to celebrate the 100th episode, I’ve compiled the best advice that our listeners have to offer about life, but also about relationships and finances.
Now you may be thinking to yourself, “Well thanks, Greg. You never mentioned it on the show. How were we supposed to submit our advice?”
And what I say to that is that the listeners were asked through both the Optimal Living Daily email list, through my own email list and through my Instagram story. I would’ve loved to shout this out on the show, but in all honesty, I just thought of the idea way too late and too close to crunch time. By the time I would’ve mentioned it on a prior episode, this one would’ve already been off for editing. So while this is a bummer, it just goes to show that it’s important to listen when I mention our email lists and Instagram handles – just saying!
Anyway, I thank you all so much for the support you’ve given to help this show get to 100 episodes. It’s my pleasure to now read for you some of the advice that you all have had to share based on your experiences. Enjoy…
Advice from Our OLA Listeners
Be kind to people.
Stay out of trouble.
Live happily and stay positive, do the things that makes you happy and love yourself.
Create such a compelling vision for yourself that not fighting for it is simply not an option.
Be yourself regardless of what others want you to be. Also, own it!
Life isn’t worth living if you’re going to live in fear.
There are two things no one can take from you…your knowledge and your name.
Don’t give up that easily.
Work to live, don’t live to work.
Just go with the flow.
Don’t grow up.
Nothing lasts forever!
Love your enemy.
Live like you’re dying.
Don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone.
From my Dad: do something that scares you every day (that’s someone else’s Dad, not my Dad. Smart guy, though).
Do what makes you happy. People are going to judge you anyway, and cares what they think?
Physical and Mental Health
The best advice I ever got was to do 15 push-ups every day. Not to build up to doing more, but to have this be your base level of fitness. Even if you work out, do 15 push-ups daily including rest days. The difference between doing 15 push-ups and doing nothing, is astounding. I've been doing this since I heard the idea (about a year and a half) and I haven't missed a day. It's been amazing. I have an awesome base level of fitness.
Based on a quote by Beau Taplin, “Whoever said the small things don't matter has never seen a match start a wildfire.” So, don't underestimate the power of micro-decisions and small beginnings because everything starts with micro-steps in each moment. Your thoughts lead to your actions, your actions turn into habits, and habits define your life.
Don’t be afraid to get help. People won’t think any less of you if you need support. We all do it at times.
You cannot heal what you are unwilling to acknowledge.
No regrets, just lessons learned (I might tweak that a little and say “no regurts, just lessons learned” because I love that commercial).
Be an inspired and loving person to other people.
Once you change the way you look at things, the things around you will change.
Be brutally honest with yourself. We always want to sugarcoat the truth to ourselves, because its difficult for most humans to accept that we could be wrong or have made bad decisions. We even downplay the good things we do because we don't don't think we are worth it, or are incapable of being good or making the right decisions. Being honest with yourself is the most simple, but often the most difficult thing to do.
You are the master of your own emotions. Never let them control you. You control them.
Trust your intuition. Don’t wait for others to give you permission or to validate you.
People’s reaction to you is a reflection of them, not you!
Oxymoronically, it’s the Dumas quote on advice, which is “As a general rule, people ask for advice only in order to now follow it; or if they do follow it, in order to have someone to blame for giving it.” (I really like this one a lot, but if it’s true, I might find myself in a spot of trouble)
Stay in the moment
The pursuit of happiness will always exist because life isn’t 100% happiness all the time.
Never stop learning, read!
Don’t take anything for granted.
My favorite life expression is “don't trouble trouble until trouble troubles you”. It's so easy to remember….not always so easy to implement. One of my coworkers said that to me years ago and I still use it constantly. Getting worked up about things that haven't actually happened is something I still work on.
(And finally, a segment from a story we received…)
I had been attending Al-Anon meetings, which are for the family members coping with an alcoholic. The meetings themselves were somewhat helpful, but it was the informal discussions with the attendees afterward that were invaluable. One night after a meeting, in a dark and snowy parking lot, I ended up in a long conversation with a man whose wife was an alcoholic. I told him how I was crippled by my dilemma–I couldn't in good conscience leave my husband because of a disease he couldn't help, but neither could I continue living with his drinking. The man said something to me that changed my life. He said, “You don't have to make that decision right now. Something will happen to make the decision for you.” I can't really explain why, but his advice immediately relieved me of my anxiety over making the right decision. It was out of my hands–it was in fate's hands.
And now onto relationships, buckle up:
Love yourself first.
Would they still love you after seeing your entire family gatherings? Yes = keeper.
There’s a reason you’re thinking about one person while dating someone else.
Be quick to forgive and don’t hold past mistakes over your significant other’s head.
Take it slow.
Read “The 5 Love Languages.” They are a thing, and when understood can really help. (Good one, this person is right. Well you’re all doing fine, but I thought I’d comment here since it’s a book reference.)
Do not try to impress, persuade, or sell yourself to your potential partner. The right person will love and appreciate all of you.
Be honest and straightforward for both.
Be happy alone, become the best version of yourself you can be. Like attracts like.
Treat your partner the way you’d like to be treated.
Marry for passion, not convenience. Easy isn’t always right.
Don’t fall in love with someone’s potential and don’t try to change your partner.
Take time to calm emotions, focus on facts. And laugh…a lot…even/especially at yourself
Marriage is like college, it isn’t for everyone no matter how much they like to push it on you. Define happiness on your own terms.
Love isn’t enough. When someone shows you who they really are, believe them.
If someone wants to date you after they broke up with someone else, don’t. You’re not a second choice.
Communicate with your partner!
Marry old and wealthy.
Have your own blanket on your side of the bed. Avoid middle of the night fights.
Take responsibility. Observe how you contributed to the challenging moments.
Just talk to them. Tell them what you’re thinking, feeling, worrying about. It’s a partnership for a reason.
Always be honest to each other.
Love someone for what they are, not for what they could be.
And finally, we’ll see what the people had to say about finances:
Create a budget.
Live like a minimalist. Your mind and your wallet will both thank you.
Save money by thinking “Do I need it or do I want it? Want is usually a no.”
Understand that money is fundamentally emotional. Once you get the emotional part down, it’ll be much easier to manage, make and spend your money.
1. Find a time machine, 2. Invest in Amazon. It’s going to be huge!
Don’t spend more than you earn.
The more you make, the less important each dollar becomes. I heard once that the jump from 25k a year to 50k a year is huge for your quality of life. The jump from 50k to 75k makes things just a little bit easier. Anything over 75k doesn’t make much of a difference.
Spend money on experiences, not objects.
Tiny houses are the future.
Much of the world lives on less than $2 a day. Keep perspective and be grateful for any salary you have.
Solar panels, man.
Save, save, save.
Match your 401k and spend 30% of income or less on living expenses.
Start investing young.
Keep 9-12 months of expenses in the bank. Invest the rest.
Start saving early in life, automatic transfers to savings, don’t try to keep up with the Jones’.
Pay yourself first.
Always plan and look at your bank statements.
(And I’ll end with some advice submitted by one of my best friends and financial advisor, John Kashmanian. Yes, his last name has “cash” in it, K-a-s-h-m-a-n-i-a-n. The irony is delicious. No free ads here, but if you’re looking for a financial advisor, I highly recommend looking him up and giving him a shout. He’s one of the good guys. Here it goes:)
- It's never too early, or too late to start saving and investing.
- There's no such thing as too small an amount to start investing with; whether you can afford $10/month or $1,000/month, let compound interest do it's magic.
- Spend your money on experiences with the people you care about
- Cash flow management and understanding your budget (if even loosely) is key. Must control your finances, not let them control you.
- The future is uncertain and can be scary, have a plan!
(Ah, I was wrong. There is one more that snuck in there. Sounds oddly familiar…)
Get dis money…(“d-i-s”).
Again, everyone, I can’t stress enough how much I appreciate all of you. Being a part of this show and a part of Optimal Living Daily is truly a treasure for me.
I’m so grateful to be doing what I’m doing here. Originally, Optimal Living Advice was just going to be tested for 20 episodes, but thanks to you all, it’s smashed through that and hopefully has a long and bright future ahead. Needless to say, you’re all a huge part of this team, and hopefully getting a chance to voice your advice today reinforced that for you.
We’re going to be back to our regularly scheduled programming next time, so keep those questions coming. Send them on over to advice AT oldpodcast DOT com
Thanks again everyone. Here’s to 100 more.